As someone who has honestly, seriously, actually – honest to God – watched every single episode of NXT UK, even I don’t think this worked – not as a payoff to a series of pro wrestling stories, and certainly not as an introduction to NXT UK.
1. Trent Seven vs. Eddie Dennis
It was under 10 minutes and they kept the pace quick, but I still couldn’t shake how weird a choice this was for the opening match. The Very Tall Eddie Dennis’ thing is that he’s a creep, but that’s a tough sell in this fast-paced world – currently, he’s a guy with no momentum wearing completely ludicrous gear. A low stakes clash of styles with Trent Seven wasn’t the remedy.
Poor Seven got dropped to the floor with a Razor’s Edge in a wild spot, and you bet your ass Trent Seven was selling the HELL out of it, just limping around to make this all work. They had to get cute with the finish though, Seven awkwardly getting sent into an exposed turnbuckle, and this really needed a better finish to both work as a TakeOver opener and also get anything over. Some stuff worked, a lot more didn’t. *3/4
2. Triple Threat Match – NXT UK Women’s Title: Kay Lee Ray [c] vs. Toni Storm vs. Piper Niven
Love Kay Lee Ray, Toni Storm, Piper Niven – but another NXT UK Women’s Title match that was pretty good and not the breakout match the championship needs. At the end of the day it was a Triple Threat Match, inherently silly with good action and big pops but also some awkward story beats. I am still not sure what a Kay Lee Ray is but she will definitely do a dive or two in big matches that make you deeply respect her. She got the win when she pinned Piper after a frog splash from Toni Storm, which felt kind of dumb. ***
3. Tyler Bate vs. Jordan Devlin
The match kind of ruled, though it wasn’t without the pitfalls of a match both promoted as a possible Match of the Year and one featuring what World Wrestling Entertainment thinks is going to appeal to the fan that says things like “Match of the Year.” Bate’s slow head-bounce off the ropes and their decision to drop the theatrics and punch at each other got rightfully laughed at in GIF form on Twitter, but my biggest problem here came when Devlin hit Bate with a Stunner on the apron, which Tom Phillips called “the hardest part of the ring” to simply re-enforce the fact that Devlin just hurt his own ass.
In between the pander wrestling (can that be a new term?), the atmosphere was great and the boys went all out. Tyler Bate and Jordan Devlin are both incredibly well-rounded pro wrestlers that blend fundamentals, the right charisma for their roles, and the capability of pulling off pretty much anything… they just love that Spanish Fly. The Tyler Driver kickout was a special apex. A great match that will somehow end up both overrated and underrated, and if anything a heck of a presentation from two exciting talents on their way up. ****
4. Fatal 4-Way Ladder Match – NXT UK Tag Team Title: Wolfgang & Mark Coffey [c] vs. Mark Andrews & Flash Morgan Webster vs. Fabian Aichner & Marcel Barthel vs. The Grizzled Young Veterans
A god damn Ladder Match. Mark Andrews & Flash Morgan Webster’s improvised double somersault plancha off a ladder through a table in a very confined space was a nice thing that happened here, and I thought Fabian Aichner’s skills translated well to the ladder gimmick – the springboard moonsault onto the propped up ladder was especially cool. Still – a god damn Ladder Match. Less a match, more a presentation. A Ladder Presentation.
WWE Presents: An Occasionally Entertaining but Ultimately Empty and Dangerous Ladder Presentation
A table imploding under Mark Coffey’s weight was a low point, but lower is that there was a WE WANT TABLES chant to begin with. Live crowd seemed to love it but ultimately it felt too long and is a rough statement on the NXT UK tag division that they can barely have a straight tag team match for the Tag Team Titles. **3/4
5. WWE U.K. Title: WALTER [c] vs. Joe Coffey
I appreciate things about this. I really do. I appreciate that WWE is putting these two big heavyweight MASTODONS against each other, like this is Mid-South Wrestling and only the men are allowed to compete for the title. I appreciate that for two years in a row, WWE and NXT UK have decided to just go with it on Joe Coffey as a marquee guy. His group Gallus is so frustratingly boring I won’t even expand on it, but I appreciate that he really has held his end of the bargain in the ring both times. And I appreciate the idea having Joe Coffey go thirty plus minutes in each big match, but after spending thirty plus minutes watching it again I think it’s a bad idea.
He did fine, but it was against WALTER. WALTER!!! 30 MINUTES! What was the reasoning? What was the intent? At what cost did WALTER spend 30 minutes trying to put away Gallus’ Joe Coffey? And that’s no offense to Joe Coffey! They kept it physical, obviously, and they didn’t lose the crowd or anything – they were relatively invested, in fact. But neither guy has enough tricks to keep interesting or even warrant a 30-minute slugfest, especially when it’s – I’m sorry – Gallus’ Joe Coffey vs. WALTER.
Passable main event but a counterproductive chapter in the WALTER title reign. ***
Then WALTER got his ass kicked by The Undisputed Era – duh. A cool moment, but after 30 minutes of watching WALTER try to put away Gallus’ Joe Coffey to see that this was really all a lead-in for the NXT vs. NXT UK special was a little demoralizing, especially when smart money is on NXT coming out of that better than not. C’mon – the lads only get a couple big shows a year! 3/10
