How can a production so big make its starring cast feel so small?
What a bleak time we are in. There’s always strings like this in WWE that really, really suck. Things cool down and the heat revs up on the Road to WrestleMania, blah blah blah. But nobody ever seems to learn how much periods like this rot the roster.
Is it that surprising that when an entire roster of wrestlers is put in boring or nonsensical situations week after week that when they’re given a shot to make some waves, it doesn’t work out?
Remember when Finn Balor, Braun Strowman, Bayley and Sasha Banks were fun to watch? Now they just feel like buffoons for going along with this stupid script. Same with Rollins. Same with Ambrose.
And then you have guys like Scott Dawson or Chad Gable, who once felt like can’t-miss prospects and now not only come off as missed chances but completely worthless dweebs.
Maybe in 2018 the whole formula of “one top guy” WWE follows might not be so good after all.
At least SmackDown is good.
RAW (11/26/18)
What are we doing here?
This is a review that should probably just be replaced with some GIF, as putting any effort into this feels like a waste.
There were a few choice moments on this show that revealed that the cogs backstage know that not only are they not all in on this production, not only that they know it’s bad, but that it might just be killing the town for good.
You’ve got Renee Young’s response to Alexa Bliss being made GM of the RAW Women’s Division (because, like all jobs, there are separate bosses for men and women): “This is absolutely ridiculous. This makes no sense.”
Then there was Nia Jax’s line in her awful promo opposite Ronda Rousey: “I’m not making excuses… I’m just stalling for time.”
RAW seems to be trying a storyline with Baron Corbin in charge of some corrupt corporation, but the execution is horrible and nobody really has confidence that they’ll get it right anyways. There’s no joy in watching corporate corruption at work. I’m not positive anyone will even really get comeuppance outside of maybe Strowman powerslamming Corbin a couple times.
Like, maybe Alexa Bliss becoming the leader of women’s division being a haphazard decision after she nonchalantly asked if the General Manager needed anything is some kind of satire on how businesses are run?
Nah, I don’t think so.
This show had some serious negative energy – the “SAY YEAH” in the Revival’s theme got cut off and even Gran Metalik screwed up the backflip spot that he NEVER screws up.
Corbin, Lashley and McIntyre as a lead trio is terrible – it’s like everyone’s a heater and nobody’s the star. Plus, the whole point of Drew with Dolph was that Drew looked big.
I’m glad Elias is getting some shine, but up against these three I’m not sure I like his chances. He and Lashley had a match and to be honest Elias is a little stiff as a babyface. Work in progress.
Lucha House Party Rules is one of the stupidest things WWE has done and trust me I know how big of a statement that is.
Ember Moon beat Alica Fox, Jinder Mahal beat No Way Jose, and I’m not sure anybody was any better for it. Sasha Banks and Bayley’s “Open Forum” had those two coming out worse.
DOLPH ZIGGLER answering Seth Rollins’ Open Challenge an hour after Dean Ambrose cut a promo from a doctor’s office while getting a shot in his ass kind of summed up the awfulness of the Rollins/Ambrose feud, didn’t it?
Am I supposed to be impressed that Rollins won with the superplex Falcon Arrow? Am I supposed to be happy? The fact that this was the most talked about thing of this show behind “I am never watching this shit again” speaks volumes about how weak this brand is right now.
Ziggler putting Rollins in chinlocks and Corbin doing the exact same thing to Balor in the main event was just not a great way to spend an evening.
Baron Corbin as the thread of RAW, Rollins and Ambrose just tanking a feud that came from Ambrose turning on Rollins after their wrestling brother announced he had CANCER, Balor and Bayley in angles meant to push them that are met with uncomfortable silence… BLEAK.
SMACKDOWN (11/27/18)
Meanwhile, this was a really fun show with every segment having a purpose and moving folks forward. Pretty much everything here felt like a consequence from last week too. It shouldn’t be exciting to say that but here we are. Where the fuck is Andrade Almas though?
I’ll ask it several times a year (and last year the shows were reversed), but how are RAW and SmackDown produced by the same company? SmackDown is so clearly a wrestling show with angles and matches and championships and whatnot and RAW is just… I can get wanting to differentiate them but I don’t even know what RAW wants to be anymore.
Big Show and The Bar ending via backstage segment was the worst, but The Bar vs. The Usos was the truth. Saying they can do this match in their sleep is a compliment. There’s such a formula to so many WWE matches but The Usos play with that formula to create hot finishes, as all the obvious closes that feel like the perfect culmination of a WWE finishing stretch just… don’t end it. Cesaro missed a couple of his uppercut counters but otherwise this was so good.
Big E’s 10-second “uhhhh” after he outed himself as a Marine fan – nice. I will take it to my grave that the original The Marine was a fantastic movie.
AJ Styles did a promo. It was fine. We are building to Styles vs. heel Daniel Bryan to close out the year and that feels very nice.
The Nakamura attacking Rusev before the bell angle has been done a million times but I’ll take a good old-fashioned wrestling angle over an Open Forum or Lucha House Party Rules or some bullshit.
Jeff Hardy’s 20th Anniversary Celebration was completely random but a very cool deal. I’m glad we have an awesome Jeff Hardy video package to replace that one during his Orton feud a decade ago sung by that guy who’s in jail for, well – just look up Lostprophets. Samoa Joe crashing the party and bringing up Jeff’s Demons™ was awesome, but I wish Joe wasn’t made to look like a chump so often prior to this.
Kofi Kingston bumping wildy for Miz’ weak strikes looked a little odd, otherwise these two had a solid match like they always do. Is Miz working Shane at Mania? If so that’s cool for Miz, though the match might have the all-time record for whiffed punches.
Randy Orton following up his thievery of Rey Mysterio’s mask with, “That wasn’t about disrespecting his heritage… it was about embarrassing him” was a wonderful bit of corporate bullshit covering for a traditional wrestling angle. I love that Rey could’ve very easily become just another guy (remember that tag team with Sin Cara?), but they’ve done an admirable job of keeping him over.
The Battle Royal main event was just like most Battle Royal’s so here’s a few random things I am loving about the SmackDown ladies: I love that Naomi remains super, insanely over with live crowds. I love that Carmella is a face who can act like a cowardly heel. I loved Mandy’s insane jumping knee to Asuka. And I loved the Asuka/Sonya staredown, complete with Sonya’s well-timed spear after she ducked a few kicks.
Charlotte vs. Becky vs. Asuka in a TLC Match for the SmackDown Women’s Title is wild stuff and I am into it.
MIXED MATCH CHALLENGE (11/27/18)
Curt Hawkins being revealed as Ember Moon’s replacement partner for Braun was legitimately the only redeeming part of RAW, and you know the decision to get there was more lazy desperation than anything.
Monster Eclipse (maybe?) vs. Mahlicia – Foxy/Ember and Mahal/Hawkins are not exactly dream matches, but at least they told a story with Hawkins trying to get a win but being too stupid to do so.
B’N’B vs Country Dominance – I appreciated Lashley doing his beatdown on Balor on the floor – ya gotta switch it up sometimes. I bet he got bored during that Corbin/Balor match too.
205 LIVE (11/28/18)
Yikes. I was excited for the Cedric/Ali vs. Buddy/Nese tag but that didn’t deliver and everything else kind of sucked. I mean this is a show ran by a guy who’s acting like some serious leader every week right after he’s done piss hijinks.
Wait a minute – is this some commentary on Trump?
Mike Kanellis vs. Noam Dar was a black hole of a match and Maria was kind of awful on commentary, really over-playing the “I’M A BAD GUY” stuff. Lucha dudes helped Dar to win and really what fun is there in these masked fellers ganging up on these complete dorks?
I am at the point with Itami’s “RESPECT ME” shtick still going on that I want to ask him to blink if he’s safe. A 2018 Itami squash isn’t a 2010 KENTA squash but it was still an OK squash. And then… DAIVARI!? And he’s aligning with Itami!? I dug Vic Joseph’s appalled delivery on “What sort of unity did we just witness between Daivari… and HIDEO ITAMI?”
The Cedric/Ali vs. Buddy/Nese tag was ultimately disappointing… they built for a while to a hot tag that wasn’t all that hot. Nigel’s point on Ali going on and on about being heart of 205 Live but never really proving it really covers a lot of WWE, doesn’t it?
NXT (11/28/18)
Pretty average episode of NXT, though I always dig when the arena switches from Full Sail. There were a few 50/50 matches that I’m not sure really helped anybody, while Lars Sullivan vs. Keith Lee mostly delivered.
Oney Lorcan throwing shots and running all over the place is always fun but him and Danny Burch vs. The Mighty wasn’t much. The Mighty seem like fine candidates for the All Elite Wrestling roster more than anything. Actually maybe Oney does too.
Marcel Barthel has got a thing to him but I am still waiting on the miscast EC3 to deliver, so their match wasn’t much. I do enjoy that Marcel threw a seated dropkick and DIDN’T slap his leg. EC3 calling out Bobby Fish hurts my tummy.
Vanessa Borne took a heck of a bump off of Mia Yim’s Eat Defeat.
Keith Lee could’ve hit a bit harder but him vs. Lars was the fun developmental big boy battle promised – dueling shoulderblocks, big collisions that popped the crowd, impressive athleticism by Lee… good stuff.
MAIN EVENT (11/28/18)
Between Titus O’Neil vs. Mojo Rawley and Zack Ryder/B-Team vs. Tyler Breeze/The Ascension, two completely forgettable matches this week – even if Breeze tagging with Ascension was kind of weird.
WWE TV Match of the Week: The Usos vs. The Bar
WWE TV MVP of the Week: The Usos
I am having a very good time with SmackDown but RAW is very, very good at making me question everything about how much time I spend with this stuff.
RAW: 1/10
SmackDown: 9/10
205 Live: 4/10
NXT: 5/10
