Sit down, wrestle kings. It’s January 4th and New Japan’s at the Tokyo Dome. Just one night. Not like the last few years with the two nights. That was weird.
0. Exhibition Match: Ryohei Oiwa vs. Boltin Oleg
Botlin Oleg is an amateur wrestler from Kazakhstan who almost qualified for the Olympics and he put on the black trunks and ran down the ramp like anyone else. They did wristlocks and waistlocks and went the 90-second distance. N/A
0. New Japan Rambo – KOPW 2023
The final four this year advanced to a match for the King of Pro Wrestling trophy, which varies as far as achievements go. The order of entry was SHO, Hikuleo, EVIL, Ishii, O-Khan, DOUKI, Rocky Romero, KENTA, Kanemaru, Henare, Taguchi, Cobb, both TMDK guys, Yujiro, Yano, ELP, Taichi and Shingo. Someone could’ve done something to make it more than a half-hour New Japan who’s who. I liked it when KENTA power walked to the ring I guess. **
0. Antonio Inoki Memorial Match: Yuji Nagata, Satoshi Kojima & Togi Makabe vs. Tatsuji Fujinami, Minoru Suzuki & Tiger Mask IV
Tiger Hattori came out of retirement to referee this match of experienced gentleman, all wearing Inoki’s red scarf. It was filled with a lively (strong style) spirit and the crowd caught a nice buzz off of Fujinami’s dragon screws. Everyone got their shit in and the vibes stayed good until Tiger and Makabe’s idea for a finish just self-destructed. ***
1. IWGP Jr. Heavyweight Tag Team Title: TJP & Francesco Akira [c] vs. YOH & Lio Rush
Ropes were run, combos hit, pins escaped at the very last second. Everyone was going for it if not fully connecting with it. ***1/2
2. IWGP Women’s Title: KAIRI [c] vs. Tam Nakano
New Japan’s title matches are known for running long, except for this one, the one for New Japan’s first Women’s Championship. Tam’s Violet Screwdriver and KAIRI’s spinning backfists were among the many cool things they got in that popped the Tokyo Dome, but they also kept having to rush onto the next cool thing as they only had two more minutes than the exhibition.
Mercedes Moné FKA Sasha Banks made her New Japan debut afterwards by attacking KAIRI and challenging her for the title, not much of it delivered well but still: Moné. ***1/2
3. IWGP Tag Team Title: FTR [c] vs. Hirooki Goto & YOSHI-HASHI
Heck of a match from two of 2022’s tag team MVPs, a tight 10-minute package built from Bishamon’s great tag team fundamentals and top guy intensity and spots from FTR including Cash Wheeler busting out a tope suicida and dragon suplex. FTR’s spike piledriver on YOSHI got a big reaction, Goto’s last-second save got a monstrous one, and the buzz as Bishamon figured out the right formula of teamwork to win was just great freaking wrestling. ****
4. NJPW World TV Title Tournament – Final: Ren Narita vs. Zack Sabre Jr.
Zack’s a blonde now and still good at wrestling, or at least committed to it being credible and sensible and European and interesting. They fought relentlessly over the right to every strike or hold and were always selling something: their aches and pains, Zack’s amusement with this kid, Ren’s disgust with this guy. Ren hasn’t taken command of the Katsuyori Shibata (on commentary) part he’s playing but has taken enough good swings that I think the system could get him there. Zack nearly won with some cradles before he caught Ren’s arm and bent it until he became the TV Champion. ****
5. NEVER Openweight Title: Karl Anderson [c] vs. Tama Tonga
This was pretty bad, for lack of effort and creativity and for feeling like what would happen if Randy Orton watched a Top 10 Sickest Moves from Japanese Wrestling video then figured out how to clone himself. Orton would’ve probably hit the finish clean. **1/2
6. Keiji Muto NJPW Last Match: Keiji Muto, Hiroshi Tanahashi & Shota Umino vs. Tetsuya Naito, SANADA & BUSHI
Almost 40 years after Keiji Muto’s first match in New Japan, this would be his last…. before a 2-match retirement in NOAH next month because this is a business, baby. He played the hits — low dropkick! Flashing elbow! Shining Wizard! — though Tanahashi talked him out of doing a moonsault like a hostage negotiator (Muto’s knees were replaced around 2001 with Pro-Wres Love). He eyed Tana’s abs at the start with maybe not a jealousy but a curiosity, then responded to Naito’s fist bump request later by telling him to get back to work – just a good wrestler to the end. All the fun nostalgia of the earlier 6-man plus an actually mobile supporting cast — good solid fun. ***1/4
7. 4-Way Match – IWGP Jr. Heavyweight Title: Taiji Ishimori [c] vs. Hiromu Takahashi vs. El Desperado vs. Master Wato
Hiromu entered in a glow-in-the-dark overcoat with tentacles sticking out of the back, dragging behind him an stuffed eyeball on a leash that kept trying to pull away. Paradise.
The match was good too, worked at a quick (not hurried) pace and highlighted by the always-on Hiromu/Despy pairing and the high drama elicited from, uh, Master Wato, who convinced me he was winning three times before a different guy did. ****
8. IWGP U.S. Heavyweight Title: Will Ospreay [c] vs. Kenny Omega
This was Kenny Omega’s first match in a New Japan ring since 2019, when he left to start AEW and continued expanding on his reputation of being The Best: at athleticism, timing, trios matches, G1 main events, TV matches with Bryan Danielson, at just making people get out of their seats and say “Jesus fuckin Christ man that was just how did he fuckin do that what the wow this is great.” He was wrestling Will Ospreay, who loudly took over the role when Omega left of being The Best, the guy who raised the bar of what was possible in a big main event pro wrestling match every single match. Long story short, combined with Omega returning to New Japan and the Tokyo Dome setting this was a big deal. Though be honest I have no idea what the best is. It’s probably just managing to get people to come to a consensus.
After 10 minutes of them trying to out-pace and out-do each other to an impressed but muted response, Omega stopped Ospreay short with a boot to the chest for the first big pop of the match. The pace escalated and they got in all their coolest stuff (plus other former New Japan main eventers coolest stuff), just like the women’s match but for 30 more minutes. There was no shortage of the spectacular and they turned in a match only a few people in the world are capable of, though I could probably say that about a majority of the AEW Trios Title Best of 7 matches happening around the same time. Omega and Ospreay’s games remain impressive but this big match between the best didn’t feel much bigger or better than a lot of other matches including those Trios Title matches and even ones with Mike Elgin for goddsakes. ****1/4
9. IWGP World Heavyweight Title: Jay White [c] vs. Kazuchika Okada
Kazuchika Okada has been New Japan’s guy for a decade now but over the last few years his aura and ring work took a little hit. Tonight he entered in a magnificent robe and wrestled in plain black trunks, a presentation with dual benefits of memorializing Inoki and giving him a fresh coat of top guy paint. His opponent was Jay White, a fine wrestler with some great matches though only a few of which I’d tell anyone to really go out of their way for. Here he was obnoxious, took bunch of fun bumps and slowed the match down by honing in on the midsection… it was the whole Jay White Experience that will probably play better on AEW TV.
Okada hitting a somersault plancha (old Inoki speciality) followed by back-to-back Rainmakers changed the mood in one of those really cozy and exciting Tokyo Dome main event ways. The journey there wasn’t as spectacular as the match before but there was less filer, more purpose, and it felt like an even bigger deal when the spectacular arrived. Jay worked like a desperate man as he kept going for the Switchblade, with the occasionally break for shit talk because that’s just who he is. Okada cracked back with an elbow and tried another Rainmaker that White ducked, only for Okada to hit the Switchblade and eventually the Rainmaker to re-capture the IWGP Heavyweight Title. For Inoki. Or Okada. For professional wrestling. ****1/4
Rambo entrant Shingo Takagi challenged Okada for the title after the match.
Happy Thoughts: Wrestle Kingdom 17 had a consistency to it, a return to form for New Japan at the Tokyo Dome that made up for there being no standout great match (yes even with the double main event) and some questionable choices (KAIRI/Tam going for 5 minutes, Anderson/Tonga going at all). 4.0 / 5.0
