I like pro wrestling. Anyone who knows me knows this – my friends, my family, and much to her regret my wife. Over the last decade, despite watching a bunch of World Wrestling Entertainment, I’ve actually cut back on it a lot. I still obsess over it to an unhealthy degree, but it could be a lot worse. Take, for example, me in 2004.
Back in the early-2000s, I was WAY into Japanese pro wrestling. All Japan, Pro Wrestling NOAH, ZERO-ONE, Michinoku Pro, Osaka Pro, Big Japan, FMW, or anything Survival Tobita and Ken the Box were doing… I was all in. My allegience tended towards All Japan from the 90s and eventually its’ spinoff Pro Wrestling NOAH, where I flipped out for Kenta Kobashi’s GHC Title reign, young KENTA and Marufuji, SUWA being SUWA, and Tamon Honda inexplicably becoming the best wrestler in the world for like six months.
It got so deep that I participated in the early-2000 Internet Japanese Wrestling Wars, as my cohorts at Happy Wrestling Land bitched and moaned with the New Japan-centric folks over at Strong Style Spirit about who’s company was the best and who’s was the worse. This was a time when New Japan seemed to have no defining mantra other than “MMA is good. Pro wrestling is bad” and NOAH had a run of awesome shows, got a lot out of nobodies like Jun Izumida and Kishin Kawabata, AND had Mitsuharu Misawa dress up as Santa Claus one time, so for me the winner was clear. There wasn’t a lot of middle ground during this feud… it was like Republicans vs. Democrats if instead of immigration policy we argued the merits of the Makai Club.
During all of this, Ring of Honor came around in 2004. I was vaguely aware of them since they began in 2002, but they did not travel to Chicago until April of 2004 at the Frontier Fieldhouse, a site they have kept as their Chicago home for the past twelve years. On that night I saw live and in-person CM Punk and Colt Cabana beat The Briscoe Brothers for the ROH Tag Team Titles, and I was intrigued. A few months later, I saw CM Punk and Ace Steel wrestle Dan Maff & BJ Whitmer in a Chicago Street Fight that ended with half the crowd throwing their chairs into the ring, and I was hooked.
I attended every ROH show I could until around 2007, just as my boys were headed to WWE. 2007 was also when I got to college and life got pretty busy. As life went on, CM Punk and Daniel Bryan became big stars in WWE, and I got all my smark-bait from Vince McMahon’s playground. I’d still keep an eye on Japanese wrestling and saw fellas like Okada and Naito debut, but didn’t really watch it outside of a few major matches. Same with ROH – I knew about Kevin Steen and El Generico and Adam Cole, but only watched from afar as my obsession with WWE truly took root.
I traveled to my first Ring of Honor show in a decade last September and had a good time. Mike Elgin vs. Watanabe and the Young Bucks both tore the house down. And when they announced that they’d be returning in May with guys from New Japan Wrestling (along with my boy Colt), I grabbed those tix.
I say all this to set the stage for this review thing. I come into this a formerly obsessive fan of Japanese wrestling, and also someone who’s not watching Ring of Honor and New Japan every week. I say that because reading the Internet wrestling discussion every day, there’s SO MUCH content out there that sometimes it feels like there’s not much room for “fun” stuff anymore. So much is viewed through a prism of, “Entertain me or you can fuck right off.”
And I know that’s wrestling … it’s on the good brothers and sisters to make you FEEL something. And if you don’t, well – it’s shit. But when there’s like 50 promotions with regularly available content over this here Internet thing, that ability to feel something turns into something else. Something weirder. Something where everything has to be ranked and rated and nitpicked and all that. And I get it. All types of media get critiqued. I fucking do it right here all the time! It makes sense. It’s easy. It’s cathartic to try and make sense of something you like so much.
But someone who sees one movie a year is probably going to enjoy that particular movie more than someone who sees tons of movies. And I watch enough wrestling to know that this show wasn’t great, but it sure was neat. And I enjoyed it, but I enjoyed it as a guy that’s only seen like three Tetsuya Naito matches and is still a little boy excited to see Jushin motherfucking Liger and Hiroshi motherfucking Tanahashi LIVE!!! I was seated right by the guardrail in the last row and got to mark the fuck out as dudes I never thought I’d see in-person made their entrance a few feet from me. So I don’t know if I’d passionately recommend this show to anyone, but damn did I have a good time.
Doors opened at 5:30. Big lines for autographs for Lethal, Cabana, Tanahashi, Tama/Roa, and then I think Liger, The Bucks and Okada later. I swooned over Tanahashi, decided I didn’t want to wait in line, and bought a hot dog.
The pay-per-view set is wild, especially after not seeing a big ROH show in years. This is a professional company. We grabbed our seats and I found myself sitting in the farthest row back but right next to the guardrail. So I was the first guy Liger would see if he looked to his left. THIS WAS A LOT OF RESPONSIBILITY.
0. Pre-Show Match: Crazy Mary Dobson vs. Kelly Klein w/ BJ Whitmer
BJ Whitmer is the most over heel in this company. This was a pretty weak way to get things going. Dobson has a good presence but was on defense most of the match and nobody really cared. Crowd picked up when Klein did a bunch of suplexes. I think she’s trying to a Rousey thing or something. I dunno. Dark Match, man. *1/4
0. Pre-Show Match: Juice Robinson & Kamaitachi vs. The All-Night Express (Rhett Titus & Kenny King) vs. Silas Young & The Beer City Bruiser
It took me a second to realize that CJ god damn Parker was right in front of me. Kamaitachi is a guy I hear a lot about as far as having good matches with Dragon Lee, and he was pretty impressive here. They strung stuff together well here and had themselves a forgettable hot match that amped the crowd up. *3/4
1. ROH TV Title #1 Contender Four Corner Survival: Dalton Castle w/ The Boys vs. Roderick Strong vs. ACH vs. Adam Page
This started off the proper pay-per-view and was pretty neat. Dalton’s got a great presence to him and is a total star. The Boys’ “FAN UP” gimmick is tremendous. Page did a damn Shooting Star Press off the apron, otherwise I have no idea what to think of him. Roddy’s run towards the end was fun. ACH is a great flyer but I don’t know where it goes. Castle win got a big ol’ pop. **1/2
2. Jushin Thunder Liger & Cheeseburger vs. The Addiction (Christopher Daniels & Frankie Kazarian)
My god, Jushin Thunder Liger in front of my eyes. This was a solid match that did what you expect – Cheeseburger gets beat down leading to the Liger hot tag. Liger was amazing and took like 2 bumps the whole match. Unfortunately one of those was a nasty fuck-up from The Addiction causing Liger to land on his head. Cheeseburger win was fun but a little awkward after everybody thought they just saw Liger die. The Cheeseburger beating post-match was well done. The Best Moonsault Ever Meltzer Driver is a move that shouldn’t work but does. **3/4
3. ROH Tag Team Title: War Machine [c] vs. The Briscoe Brothers
This was pretty fun, just big hairy dudes flying all over and doing Strong Style shit. Finish was weird as the bell didn’t sound right away and the crowd got confused. The Briscoes are still kicking, doing their thing. War Machine was really impressive athletically and I’d like to see what they can do with a legitimate story. **3/4
4. Tetsuya Naito vs. Kyle O’Reilly
Tetsuya Naito is pretty awesome … he does the DILLIGAF gimmick perfectly. Not really sure what to tell you about the match though. They did some grappling, Naito was a bit of a dick, and it never really hit second gear. Naito dropped the IWGP Title on the ramp for his entrance and it just stayed their the whole match, so for most of it I was just transfixed by the IWGP Heavyweight fucking Title being so close I could touch it. I did not though … didn’t want some young boy to run out and kick my ass. As Naito walked to the back, he passed my screaming self, begging for him to recognize me, asking for a clasp of the hand. He looked at me in the eye and paused, as if he was taking pity on me. And we fist bumped. Night made. **1/2
5. Hiroshi Tanahashi & Michael Elgin vs. Kazuchika Okada & Moose w/ Stokley Hathaway & Gedo
This was probably the Match of the Show. You’ve got Tanahashi and Okada tearing it up and the inexplicably great Okada/Moose tandem, with the “MOOSE” taunt almost being the most over thing on the show. Moose and Elgin going at it was great fun too. Okada vs. Tanahashi at the start got SUCH a hot reaction. It was very much a House Show type of match, which was odd for a PPV, but still – a House Show match can be very fun. Before Okada entered the ring crew handed out Okada bucks that we got to throw at him, and the good samaritans at 1053 Ridge assisted with the clean-up afterwards. That Okada buck will stay with me forever. ***1/4
6. ROH TV Title: Tomohiro Ishii [c] vs. Bobby Fish
Hard-hitting but kind of boring. Just one of those matches that made me not give a shit about Ring of Honor after a while.. some cool stuff, nasty strikes, near falls… but not much to it. Fun seeing Ishii live, and I’m not sure I have one thing to say about Bobby Fish. **1/4
7. The Bullet Club (The Young Bucks & The Guerillas of Destiny) vs. Matt Sydal, KUSHIDA & The Motor City Machine Guns (Alex Shelley & Chris Sabin)
I can now die knowing that I saw Camacho live. This was the fun spotfest this show needed … lots of complex sequences and great flying. Anything in between the flying wasn’t much, but I had a good time. Story going into the match was the Bucks were looking to set a record for most superkicks thrown and they ended up throwing none. IT WAS FUN! ***
8. ROH World Title: Jay Lethal [c] vs. Colt Cabana
This was more about the post-match angle than the actual match. The Cabana pop in Chicago is always great. Early stuff wasn’t much really, they traded holds and popped the crowd occasionally. But this closed strong, with no finish as the Young Bucks interfered and superkicked a lady and the ref… they handed Cabana and Lethal the shirts, and for a second I totally bought Cabana joining the Bullet Club. And then the lights went out and Adam Cole returned and joined the Club. Then the Bullet Club destroyed a bunch of ring crew guys and it was pretty sweet. **
I had a good time. No big hook to get me to come back, no real compelling characters, and a lot of the matches were those classic “that sure was athletically pretty impressive but not sure I cared” type of matches. But still, LIGER LIGER LIGER!!! TANAHASHI!!! I SAW TANAHASHI LIVE!!! God bless you, Ring of Honor. Now do something interesting.
