Back in my day, running a pro wrestling show in a Dome was a sign of success. These days, it’s just something New Japan does two nights in a row despite all the circumstances — depleted roster, trash atmosphere, COVID-19 — saying HEY! Maybe that will be weird and not good.
The boys (and girls!) are working hard, but staying the course is in The Company’s blood and that blood is seeping all over the screen. Most of the top guys seem bored and the most interesting match recently had DOUKI going 30-minutes in front of 580 people at Korakuen Hall. From the Western perspective, wrestling Twitter after a big New Japan show could probably be compiled into a bad book of poetry too. “My heart… it is lost to EVIL…”
This show took place at the MetLife Dome with two-thousand-something people there each night. I think that’s due to COVID restrictions and not lack of demand, but it still looks and sounds weird and not good.
Wrestle Grand Slam in MetLife Dome – Night 1 (9/4/21)
0. Momo Watanabe & Saya Kamitani vs. Maika & Lady C
The Stardom showcase matches that opened each night are a lot better than a pandemic RAMBO or even modern Jr. Tag Team Title match, though they also stuck to the showcase concept — get your shit in but don’t freak anybody out.
Lady C popped commentary with her kneelift and Momo reliably messed folks up, while Maika did three awesome power suplex variations: double vertical suplex, deadlift out of a necklock / bodyscissors into suplex, and a superplex suplex. Kamitani showed off a little too before going ahead and freaking everyone out just once by way of a Phoenix splash. **3/4
1. Robbie Eagles & Tiger Mask vs. Hiromu Takahashi & BUSHI
This was a preview match for tomorrow that also set Robbie Eagles and geriatric Tiger Mask up as Jr. Tag Team Title challengers — how’s that for booking that is both efficient and sad at the same time? Hiromu and Robbie did enough to tease a quality match tomorrow in between Tiger taking heat and Hiromu putting on Robbie’s bandana. Real good topes here too. **3/4
2. YOH vs. SHO
Former teammates and you have to assume best friends collide! And it’s pretty good. Heel SHO has added a swagger to his entrance and while he doesn’t do much to distinguish himself as anything other than a standard issue New Japan junior heavyweight heel, standard issue can work if you just try hard enough.
YOH meanwhile gets in the ring and elbows SHO in the face, then shows some much-needed intensity as he kicks him around. Did a sweet roll-through calf crusher thing too. The problem is they go nearly half an hour. Dig the swagger, dig the intensity — the in between wasn’t all there. Still, good match and necessary resets for both. ***1/4
3. No DQ I Quit Match – KOPW Title: Chase Owens [c] vs. Toru Yano
Who’s it for? Who is it for? Half-hour Toru Yano brawl with the crappiest American wrestler in New Japan since Jack Bull. Is New Japan meta now? Why would- DUD
4. Kazuchika Okada vs. Jeff Cobb
If any of the last few matches deserved some time it was probably this, and it got time: another half-hour! And I don’t think they did enough with it. There’s the occasional cool moment – a Cobb suplex or Okada doing a hang loose pose – but Cobb just feels like a scab top guy and only in the rarest occasion do I buy him doing the whole New Japan thing with a New Japan guy. Okada sells like a (former) champ but at this point he’s just running through the usual, and the big near falls at the end didn’t feel earned — nor did the Cobb win. **1/2
5. IWGP U.S. Heavyweight Title: Hiroshi Tanahashi [c] vs. Kota Ibushi
After a grudge match, comedy match, and Okada match that all lasted thirty minutes apiece, the main event shook things up: under twenty minutes! It’s probably because Ibushi is making his return from a respiratory illness, but something is definitely up when Hiroshi Tanahashi of all people pulls rank and says: “I think I wanna to go 15 minutes tonight.”
The match is very good, delivered by two fellows who are very good at this. They hit the mat for a little and when they first stand up to square up again, there’s a joy in Ibushi’s face — I assume either because he has returned to pro wrestling or because he forgot he’s worked Tanahashi before and is just really excited.
The basic idea here is Ibushi keeps going for the kill and Tana targets the leg, though there isn’t an extended portion of leg work at all — special stuff. Ibushi’s choice of weapon is a knee to the face in a variety of ways: he blocks a High Fly Flow and pulls Tanahashi into the setup for a Kamigoye, and right before the end he pulls out what I can only describe as a bicycle Kamigoye. Tanahashi’s face reads that he’s accepted his fate after that one, but the Ace has still got tricks. The rating here probably says below average New Japan main event, but I really appreciated them keeping it simple for once. ***3/4
Wrestle Grand Slam in MetLife Dome – Night 2 (9/5/21)
0. Giulia & Syuri vs. Momo Watanabe & Saya Kamitani
The energy that Giulia and Syuri bring to their entrance dance number is so infectious that it basically carries the whole match. Watanabe and Kamitani return to kick ass and do wild things respectively, including a massive springboard plancha from Kamitani. She tries to repeat last night’s Skytwister press but Giulia cuts her off and Syuri brings her down with a rough-looking Hoverboard Lock that she flips into a stretch muffler for some reason. Each showcase struggled to keep momentum but my goodness: for the variety alone, more Stardom on these shows. ***
1. Kazuchika Okada & Tomohiro Ishii vs. Jeff Cobb & Great O-Khan
This was Ishii’s return after visiting the U.S. to carry Moose to a good match, and what a guy: he did the same here for Okada, Cobb, and O-Khan. I mean maybe he did, all I know is his presence made everything a lot more engaging. He worked the mat with O-Khan, traded shots with Cobb, and anytime the match revved up it was on him. Khan’s delivery on a boot to assist Cobb’s suplex and his iron claw slam were especially nifty too. Okada mostly sold his back and repeated stuff with Cobb. ***1/4
2. IWGP Jr. Heavyweight Tag Team Title: Taiji Ishimori & El Phantasmo [c] vs. El Desperado & Yoshinobu Kanemaru
After the last year-and-a-half the idea of troll heels as Jr. Tag Team Champions seems at the very least redundant, no? Once Ishimori and ELP stopped messing and El Desperado started wrestling it did get pretty good, but that’s kind of the verdict on every Jr. Tag Title match at some point. Despy’s loud grunt off an ELP thrust kick makes the near fall that follows, and his mannerisms in using the iron fingers at the end help make the iron fingers not that lame. ***
3. 3-Way Match – IWGP Tag Team Title: Zack Sabre Jr. & Taichi [c] vs. Hirooki Goto & YOSHI-HASHI vs. Tetsuya Naito & SANADA
There was allegedly a match here, but I couldn’t follow the plot. Each team sort of got a little section to do their thing and occasionally they do something cool – ZSJ running uppercut to Taichi high kick whoaaa – but there isn’t anything holding it together so in the end it’s just a long misfire. **3/4
4. IWGP Jr. Heavyweight Title: Robbie Eagles [c] vs. Hiromu Takahashi
If New Japan wasn’t going through all this “stuff” I think Robbie Eagles might be getting more love. Keeping up with the six or seven junior heavyweights still active in New Japan isn’t the most impressive thing anyone’s ever done but now this is 2 for 2 him keeping up with and even adding a distinct feel to big deal IWGP Jr. Title matches. There’s an element of trickery to the man’s movements that I respect. When he kicks out of the Time Bomb it doesn’t feel completely earned, but the force with which Hiromu taps to his legbar has it all making sense. Is Robbie Eagles a metaphor for the loss of New Japan’s soul? I don’t know, but he’s way better than Marty Scurll or something. ***1/2
5. IWGP World Heavyweight Title: Shingo Takagi [c] vs. EVIL
For all the bad marks on New Japan right now, World Heavyweight Champion Shingo Takagi is an unquestionable bright spot. He’s got a way of building up momentum and energy and just making people give a shit throughout his matches both short and long-term, and if all else fails this great wrestler will close the show strong.
EVIL and the new “House of Torture” offshoot of the Bullet Club put that theory to the test, but it still held true. Kind of. EVIL is washed as an offense guy and he doesn’t even look cool during his entrance anymore, but in between all the interference and commentators taking bumps there was Shingo Takagi, building momentum and energy and just making people give a shit. The bad guys ran in, the good guys ran in, and Shingo closed the show strong. Kind of. ***
Happy Thoughts: The 2-night MetLife Dome show had a few good matches (Tanahashi/Ibushi, Hiromu/Eagles) but more than anything it was marred by stubborn or outright crappy decisions, from matches that went too long to a reluctance to do anything new other than give Will Ospreay a faction. Average Dome show with an atmosphere that made it a tedious Dome Show. 2.0 / 5.0
