Hiroshi Yamato vs. Hideki Okatani
Yamato seems to have hooked up with Daisuke Sasaki’s Damnation Wolfpac on a recent show that I missed. He’s rocking the same kind of Siouxsie and the Banshees eyeliner and unfortunately no longer sings his heart out on the way to the ring. The guy’s long been condemned to midcard purgatory due to his various comedy tropes, but he still has a flawless grasp of professional wrestling. This wasn’t his first time working with DDT rookies and I always dig him forcing the kids to fight for every scrap of offense. Not kidding: in some Alternate Puro Universe, Yamato’s good looks and major league polish landed him a long-term Ace spot on top of a semi-successful AJPW-sized promotion. **1/4
Danshoku Dino vs. Keigo Nakamura
One of the less offensive Dino matches in a while. I think? Nakamura’s failed sneak attack during the show introduction cracked me up and Shooter Dino snatching on a chickenwing armlock out of nowhere was pretty neat. Lots of kissing-based submissions but no anal play to be found. These are the mental gymnastics I go through to rate Dino matches. *3/4
HARASHIMA, Toru Owashi & Yukio Naya vs. Chris Brookes, Shunma Katsumata & Antonio Honda
Say what you will about the Honda fake injury joke routine, but I’m always amazed by how seamlessly this stuff is integrated in the middle of straight wrestling matches and how quickly the DDT guys are able to get back on track afterwards. They took the gag to new galaxy brain levels here with Brookes and HARASHIMA seemingly falling in love during the segment. Very happy for them. The non-comedy action was on point as well: lots of fast paced, well put-together exchanges from all involved. No complaints. **1/2
Shinya Aoki vs. Mad Paulie
Who knew Mad Paulie had the Best of Vader in UWFi in his tape collection? The Juggalo Juggernaut showed pretty decent understanding of shoot style wrestling here, what with the big suplexes and smart use of his size advantage. The match wasn’t long enough to really get cooking, but I dug the clash of styles and legit-ish presentation. That final leglock counter from Aoki looked gnarly as hell. **3/4
Jun Akiyama & Makoto Oishi vs. Konosuke Takeshita & Akito
The All Out/Junretsu feud could last another year and I wouldn’t mind at all. It feels like a mash-up of all the best Japanese wrestling tropes. Classic All Japan style generational warfare, outsider invasion beef, technical dudes doing technical shit, young boys stepping up to impress their sempai. The list goes on and on. As we get closer to Ultimate Party, the Jun/Takeshita exchanges keep getting more intense. More guardrail whipping dickery, more suplex no-selling bravado. These men know exactly what you want and they are giving it to you. Plus, they’re doing all of this shit in 9 minutes, which makes it all the more enthralling. Icing on the cake: All Out went FULL KINNIKUMAN for the finish: Akito busting out an inventive Muscle buster/Kneebreaker combo and Takeshita destroying Oishi with a suplex that has to be seen to be believed (Neptuneman’s Double Leg German Suplex). ***1/2
Endo/Sasaki isn’t my ideal Ultimate Party main event, but I can’t deny how much hatred they’re bringing to this story. The contract signing segment was tense and featured just the right amount of violence in the inevitable pullapart brawl conclusion.
CIMA vs. Soma Takao
Not something that’s gonna end up on many spreadsheets, but it did the job as a by the numbers CIMA singles match. It’s difficult to get invested in Takao since he’s such a blank slate, so the pre-match deep dive video in his former CIMA parody gimmick (BIMA) was super helpful in adding some back story to the match. The Strong Hearts boss did a fine job fleshing out the first half of the match with some arm-targeting lucha submissions and Soma tagged along with his dropkick comebacks and signature spot thievery. Not much else to say other than CIMA looks in great shape despite his recent bike accident. ***
Kazusada Higuchi, Yukio Sakaguchi & Saki Akai © vs. Yuki Ueno, Naomi Yoshimura & Kazuki Hirata – KO-D 6-Man Tag Team Titles
Kazusada Higuchi & Yukio Sakaguchi vs. Yuki Ueno & Naomi Yoshimura © – KO-D Tag-Team Titles
Listen to me, you dorks. Not only will I be reviewing these two matches as one package deal, but I will also throw ridiculous amounts of praise at the whole thing. While the tag title match was clearly the center piece of this story, the 6-man tag was crucial to the overarching structure and can’t be removed from the equation.
In that first section, Saki and Hirata were key in establishing tone and setting up curveball twists for the tag title match. Yoshimura being dismissive of Saki and forcing her to beat the shit out of him to get his attention set a tense mood that stuck all the way to the end. Right off the bat, this didn’t feel like a normal DDT main event, this was a fight. Meanwhile, presumed fall guy Hirata’s presence was the perfect red herring to throw you off the scent of the real story: Ueno stepping up to Sakaguchi and getting choked to death for his sins.
All of this set up the tag title match in absurdly dramatic fashion. With Ueno dead on his feet from receiving the full wrath of Sakaguchi, Yoshimura was left alone to fend off the most dangerous team in the promotion and put in one of the most inspired performances of his young career. Naomi’s always been an adorable goofball, but here he finally came across as a killer. Not to be outdone by his partner, Hot Tag Ueno had some exchanges with Sakaguchi that felt straight out of a G1 Climax final. Absolutely unreal.
The relentless brutality, exhaustion selling and endless fire from everyone involved made this nothing less than a god damn war. Chests bled, shoot headbutts were thrown and stars were made. Eruption came off as destruction incarnate and Nautilus finished their reign on the highest note possible. One of the most well laid out wrestling epics of the year. ****1/2
