This is a continuation of Year in Review – WWF Tuesday Night Titans (1986) – Part 1. For full matchlists of TNT, check out the WWF 1980 WWE Network matchlists page.
Tuesday Night Titans #83 (5/7/86)
The one with Fuji Vice.
For a sleepy May episode of TV this one is actually pretty stacked, with a whole lot of Adrian Adonis, Bruno Sammartino, and FUJI VICE.
The first half of this show is all Adrian Adonis and Jimmy Hart, as he beats Paul Roma and gets his beauty treatment done on the TNT set. Roma gets a few fired up shots in and seems like a guy who will get some love, but not tonight. Adonis says he “gets off” when another man is bouncing off the canvas, to which Vince responds that he might be getting off the set there in a second. It should perhaps be covered more how antagonistic Vince was towards Adonis and why he was, as he treats homosexuality puns with the same contempt for a man crippling the World Champion.
A bunch of women apparently travel with Adonis and do extensive makeup for him everyday, and throughout the show Adonis is getting his “beauty treatment” done. George “The Animal” Steele joins the set too, apparently on his own now as Captain Lou Albano wants him to “move into the mainstream.” George is asked for his thoughts on Adonis, to which he responds “different.” All this pays off at the end of the show, as Adonis reveals his “final form” after the beauty treatment to a mix of laughs and boos, before Steele attacks him and they have a wild brawl where Vince bounces around like he’s Gumbi or something.
Bruno Sammartino and his kid David squash Steve Lombardi & Mr. X here, one of the many times Bruno was used to try and make something of David but ended up just dwarfing David. I loved the end of this match, as Mr. X goes to make the save as Lombardi is pinned by David but Bruno steps in and Mr. X puts his hands up like “OK, OK, no trouble” and backs off. Bruno joins the set too (sans David) to talk weight, technique, speed, and endurance – the usual.
The premiere of the somewhat-legendary Fuji Vice is the highlight here, pure wonderful campiness from the World Wrestling Federation, made all the more better by it featuring the absolutely legendary character that is Mr. Fuji. “Ahhhh you guys, there’s a body over here!” – CUE TV THEME SONG. This is a legit act or two of a TV show, where the plot is they find a dead guy who was murdered by “The Seahawk” and it turns out the guy who died has a sister and SHE is The Seahawk! “Turk – tie ’em up,” Muraco says, as he and Fuji stand back as a guy ties the criminals up with all the intensity of a Rusher Kimura match.
Muraco and Fuji’s constant looks at the camera are good fun, just terrible actors in a bad TV show. The WWF did a LOT of “we’re like Hollywood!” stuff as they figured themselves out in the 80s, but this one has endured as it nailed the campiness that the WWF always forgets to utilize when they do this stuff.
‘Til next time!
Worth Watching?: Yes
Tuesday Night Titans #84 (5/14/86)
The one with Jimmy Jack Funk.
Terry Funk has left the WWF, leaving Hoss Funk without a partner – enter Jimmy Jack Funk, who is really Jesse Barr, older brother of Art Barr. He wears a Lone Ranger mask but with his stringy hair and tights one could surmise that Vince actually thought he could just replace TERRY FUCKING FUNK. That clearly wasn’t going to happen, but the intro of Jimmy Jack here certainly injects the crazy back into the Funk act, which was needed as quiet slow Hoss never quite felt right in the WWF.
TNT provides us his backstory, as Jimmy Jack was apparently kept in a bunkhouse for most of his life. He wins a match for he and Hoss with a fallaway slam powerslam deal that’s pretty wild.
Jimmy Hart, Hoss and Jimmy Jack then take Vince and Lord Alfred Hayes outside to a BBQ where they’re roasting a full-sized pig and let me tell you what guys THIS IS WHAT PROFESSIONAL WRESTLING IS ALL ABOUT. Jimmy Jack yells about having five horses like some loaded up freak and Vince hilariously takes Hoss aside to genuinely ask about Jimmy Jack’s well-being. Alfred tells Jack and Jimmy to get their grubby hands off him, and he ends up with BBQ sauce dumped all over him which seems like a bit much until Jack WRAPS A NOOSE AROUND HIS NECK and they hang Alfred from a tree. I’m serious, that’s not an attempt at a punchline. Vince flees as Hart shouts on the microphone.
They cut back to the set, where a somber Vince only states that Alfred has been detained and will not be back for the remainder of the show. He hopes he’s alright.
Bobby Heenan joins the show to try and keep Bundy’s steam rolling after the loss to Hogan, where he introduces 120 seconds of 1-on-2 dominance complete with Big John Studd grinning on the outside as Bundy calls for the 5-count. Heenan claims that the cage door at WrestleMania 2 was made specifically so Bundy could not escape, hence why he lost. Heenan goes in on Vince, claiming he was pampered all his life, asking: “Were your hands ever dirty?” “My hands are only dirty when I shake hands with the likes of you, Mr. Heenan,” retorts a very salty sassy Vince.
Corporal Kirchner, who has not caught on as Sgt. Slaughter II, says that he brought his flag to the ring because Iron Sheik will be seeing stars. He and Sheik have a real basic match with a crazy hot crowd that ends when Nikolai Volkoff runs in and The Killer Bees make the save. When explaining a future tag strategy on the couch, Kirchner says that he and his partner will “go for what we know.” Heenan, who stuck around for the Kirchner segment, says that won’t take long.
Hillbilly Jim may or may not be back and Vince introduces his tag team opponents as such: “Bob Bradley, Terry Gibbs… teaming up, I believe, for the first time… both of whom on an individual basis are quite accomplished in terms of their wrestling skills.” I love it – you’ve got to build them up before they quickly come crashing down. Hillbilly Jim also plays a song on this show, but the WWE Network has stricken it from the record.
McMahon: Could you please take your feet off the furniture… You don’t do that at home, do you?
Heenan: No, I have good stuff.
Worth Watching?: Yes, just for the BBQ
Tuesday Night Titans #85 (5/21/86)
The one with PAUL CHRISTY.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Sometimes, TNT can still bring the weird.
Mean Gene Okerlund is the surprise guest host for this how, bringing hard punchlines like some hack comedian. Vince would resume hosting the next week for the 2-Year Anniversary Show, then Gene would take over permanently after that.
Look, there’s some of the usual stuff here – Nikolai Volkoff squashes Tony Garea in a match with more miscommunication issues than you’d expect, while Iron Sheik tells Vince that he reminds him of one of the old country Jew businessmen. Ricky Steamboat pulls a classic “I don’t know if the fans understand but…” by explaining that when it’s summer in the United States it’s winter in Australia. He says he got a haircut just so he could look at the knot Jake Roberts put in his head without pulling his hair back.
The WWF toured Australia for a few days in April which gives S.D. Jones and Paul Roma a mini-push, as hilariously they were featured acts on that tour. Mean Gene comments on the koalas they saw eating eucalyptus leaves all day: “they’re stoned, they’re smashed – constantly.” S.D. and Roma’s tag squash has an awesome bit where S.D. passionately struggles twice before he slams Angelo, creating one heck of a satisfying bodyslam.
But none of that really matters, does it?
Because this show has Paul Christy.
Paul Christy was a journeyman wrestler for 20 years before he settled in Angelo Poffo’s ICW, where he defeated Poffo’s son Randy Savage for the ICW Heavyweight Title before Savage left for the WWF. The ICW had since closed, and Christy was brought into the WWF for mostly enhancement work for the first six months of 1986. It’s possible he could have gone beyond that, but any chance of that happening was hindered by probably this show but judging by how he acted here perhaps it was hindered by more than we could ever even know.
Christy joins the set and essentially goes into business for himself, but in a way I really do respect – he was an oddball, something completely different, going for some kind of Andy Kaufman-type of I AM NOT OF YOUR REALITY gimmick that’s insane to watch play out. That’s not going to work for a guy like Vince McMahon though. Christy refuses to sit on the couch and engage in questions, and goes into what I can only call a manifesto about the three most powerful things, and how he he has sex and money but he needs power so that’s why he’s here. It’s actually kind of brilliant… but it keeps going.
There’s a magic show planned for later in the show and Christy says he’s a magician – though all he does is a cheap flame trick. An actual magician is introduced but Christy just keeps standing and talking and slamming his box on Mean Gene’s desk and things get legitimately uncomfortable as he cuts Gene off on everything and refuses to cede his time. Gene pokes him with a pencil, whistles – and he keeps going. Lord Alfred, since returning from the tree incident, facepalms in the background. He’s finally just cut off. I can’t tell if this was on purpose or legitimately a trainwreck and honestly I really don’t want to know.
Finally, Danny Lee – a very game professional for entering this world – prepares his magic set. But this is no magic set, not at all. You see, Danny Lee sets up swords and makes weird faces as trippy Mario music plays and then a mystery man comes out wielding his own sword dressed as Indiana Jones as the Indiana Jones theme plays and then Danny Lee kills the sword guy and takes his sword and sets it on the other sword and then a lady comes on and he hypnotizes her and Danny Lee taps the sword guy to make him come alive again and they lift her onto the swords and she levitates as everybody claps. OH MY GOD.
Cut to Mean Gene looking visibly bored.
The show ends with the levitating on Lord Alfred’s lap getting cozy.
Worth Watching?: Yes, just for Paul Christy
Tuesday Night Titans #86 (5/28/86)
The one with Harley Race and The Mating Game.
This is the two-year Anniversary show and Vince McMahon’s final one as host, though it’s not the expected batch of clips and instead a straightforward episode of TNT highlighted by the WWE Network debut of Harley Race.
Harley Race’s third match since returning to the WWF is shown, a squash of John Centeno as Race’s manager Bobby Heenan watches outside. Bruno puts over Race’s experience on commentary, and Race ends it with a brutal slingshot suplex that’s basically a brainbuster.
Vince references the cake for their 2nd anniversary show, Heenan asks if Alfred baked it (Alfred says he has servants to do that), Vince says Alfred looks like he’s been dusted in flour from time to time… he’s been involved in the white stuff before. Sly smile to the camera, damnit Vince McMahon.
Just a few minutes of The British Bulldogs vs. King Kong Bundy & Big John Studd are shown, and it ends when Dynamite jumps on Studd and Studd pushes the ref for a DQ. The bad guys try an Avalanche but Davey Boy escapes, then they push each other. Dissension in the ranks!
Vince lets himself have one last bit of fun as he puts on The Mating Game with The Hart Foundation of Jimmy Hart, Bret Hart and Jim Neidhart. He does introductions for each guy but it’s overdubbed by loud music to I assume go over the actual Dating Game music, but they don’t go to the trouble when this is re-aired on Prime Time Wrestling. Phoebe Zimmerman is our Bachelorette, and she gets progressively more creeped out by this group of creeps as the answers go on. Bret introduces himself with, “Yes… hello baby. Who loves ya, bay?” while Neidhart just deadpans “Hello, my child.” She ends up choosing nobody, and Miss Yolanda Jones who has a very big mole under her nose is introduced as the alternate contestant. This would all weirdly be continued.
Mean Gene Okerlund is introduced as the new host of TNT in the middle of the show, and the TNT torch is passed when Vince picks Phoebe up and hands her to Mean Gene at the end of it.
Worth Watching?: Yes
Tuesday Night Titans #87 (6/4/86)
The one with a Macho Man Randy Savage Audience Q&A.
This show is bookended by Jake Roberts and Randy Savage and there really are not a better pair of bookends you could ask for in 1986.
Jake Roberts is still talking Ricky Steamboat, commenting on his own bandaged head: “Well I give a little and I take a LOT.” It’s such a cool line that somebody in the crowd whistles. Lord Alfred sits on the other side of the couch from Jake as he shows off some of his snakes and casually goes on about how poisonous some are. The big fat and lazy snake reminds him of Hogan, who will fall into his trap sooner or later. Shaking.
Jake has a very basic armbar-based squash with Ricky Hunter but Steamboat on commentary with Vince and Bruno is interesting, with Steamboat selling the effects of Jake’s attack on Saturday Night’s Main Event hard and saying he can’t sleep at night. “THERE IT IS, THERE’S THE DDT… THERE IT IS!”
Mike Rotunda is back and now he’s with Danny Spivey in place of Barry Windham, though nobody seems excited about this including them. Spivey is shown beating Terry Gibbs in a match where his leg drop (!) gets a 2-count (!) and his bulldog gets a 3. Spivey and Rotunda then team against Steve Lombardi & Paul Christy in a match where Christy looks like he legitimately cannot wrestle. All-time bad double dropkick, all-time bad assisted clothesline… bad bad bad.
Macho Man Randy Savage takes crowd questions to end the show. He is SO funny, the greatest of all time at mouthing off. He ignores questions, shouts at people, flexes – it’s incredible. “Yeah I heard the question, this isn’t bilingual here… unbelievable. NEXT QUESTION. SIT DOWN, GARY!” Maxine asks Savage what it’s like to be applauded and he says she put him on the spot with that question, so she says HE put her on the spot when he stole the belt from her main man Tito – OOOOH!
Savage shows off what he used to take the belt – his muscles.
Worth Watching?: Yes
Tuesday Night Titans #88 (6/11/86)
The one with dog training.
Junkyard Dog is here and though that means he wants the IC Title and is loosely teaming with George “The Animal” Steele, what that really means is that we have ourselves a dog training session complete with runway and jazz music going over what appears to be some great banter between dog trainer Beatrice Connelly and the three WWF guys in Mean Gene, Lord Alfred, and JYD. Beatrice is older but a little foxy, and reads introductions for each trick off a piece of paper.
Magnificent Muraco and Mr. Fuji talk up Muraco doing the piledriver the right way, still talking shit about Orndorff months after Mania. Mean Gene gets straight to the point with Mr. Fuji:
Okerlund: I’ve heard those rumors for years… you don’t actually eat dog, do you?
Fuji: How do you think we’re so smart? * smile *
Okerlund: That’s gotta be a rib, Don.
Also Sivi Afi does another fire dancing routine that they play, like, spy music over.
Worth Watching?: No
Tuesday Night Titans #89 (6/18/86)
The one where they try to get George “The Animal” Steele laid.
Look, I didn’t book this.
George “The Animal” Steele is still crushing on Elizabeth, though he’s also winning squashes with very awkward rollups in between. He’s also joining the TNT set, where Mean Gene has George lay down on a couch for what one might presume is some therapy. Mean Gene brings in a lady named Suzette Lace, who tries to get George to talk to her. When he’s unresponsive she takes off her jacket and kisses him. Not passionately, but she definitely kisses him. And we go to commercial.
Heenan shows up to set with lipstick on his cheek, so I guess the TNT crew hired another hooker for the day.
Leaping Lanny Poffo joins the show and actually hits a TV studio light with a frisbee, which is hysterical. He beats Tiger Chung Lee with a hurricanrana after taking a bump over the top rope off a CHOP, and Mean Gene wonders aloud how someone with a limp wrist like Adrian Adonis might throw a frisbee.
Cowboy Bob Orton beats Sal Gee in a match where Bruno comments, “If you see him, one thing he does he takes an individual and suplexes them off the top rope” – SO TRUE. Mean Gene makes innuendo that Piper and Orton might’ve been gay, just a man obsessed with the culture, and Cowboy Bob retorts: “Everything with you is so sexual, you sick little man you.”
Orton then plays pool with a member of the crowd named Larry who shoots first and just swaggers around and pockets all the balls like a boss. Orton doesn’t even get one shot and says Gene hustled him.
The show ends with Gene grabbing Suzette and kissing her.
Worth Watching?: No
Tuesday Night Titans #90 (6/25/86)
The one with stand-up comedy and a fashion show.
Magnificent Muraco and Mr. Fuji are still claiming to be talented at something other than wrestling, though when Lord Alfred Hayes recites SHAKESPEARE Fuji laughs off doing the same. Muraco and Fuji go on a set for a bit of stand-up comedy that ends up them going through comedy routines VERY VERY VERY quickly and VERY VERY VERY badly while Gene and Hayes are pissing themselves with laughter. “I’LL GIVE YOU TOPICAL.” It’s bad, but a good bad.
Mean Gene, ever the sexual being, asks Classie Freddie Blassie if he ever had an affair with the Fabulous Moolah before Hercules Hernandez bends some pipes and lifts Gene in the air.
Mean Gene, ever the the sexual being, ribs Arnold Skaaland about Moolah and his clothes too but Arnie just takes it. Inside jokes means nobody’s watching.
Jimmy Hart actually calls Gene out on his shit before introducing Adrian Adonis: “1,000 comedians out of work and you want to act like one and talk like one!”
ADRIAN ADONIS FASHION SHOW. That’s really all I’ve got to say.
Classic shot at the end of Mean Gene and Alfred wearing Adonis’ gimmicks and just having the best time.
Worth Watching?: No
Tuesday Night Titans #91 (7/2/86)
The one with Macho Man Randy Savage visiting a therapist.
This show has two great things going for it: the aforementioned therapist, and the very underrated King Tonga (Haku) slamming Big John Studd angle.
But first, we’ve got Johnny Valiant and The Dream Team for an interview where nobody seems to have anything planned. It turns into a mini-This is Your Life for Johnny Valiant with high school coach Dave Gilespie joining the show to reveal that Valiant wasn’t much of an athlete and just “hung around” the wrestling team.
Blackjack Lanza joins the show where he talks real soft about taking a behind the scenes role in the WWF. Footage is shown of Lanza turning on Bobby Heenan a couple years ago and I’m pretty sure it’s AWA footage, which doesn’t seem right. Lanza recants a pretty great story about Lord Alfred Hayes coming to America and actually thinking he’d be recognized, so he wore a cowboy hat and cowboy boots.
King Tonga gets grilled my Mean Gene about the difference between Samoa and Tonga, of which King Tonga calmly explains that they are simply two different islands with two different languages. They show the Studd angle, where Tonga just hops in the ring and slams his big ass like it’s nothing, holding him up for a bit as the crowd goes crazy. Heenan has been ducking him on the $15,000 promised to anyone who could slam Studd, and Gene asks Tonga what he has to do to get the money. “Well – I guess I have to slam him again.”
Macho Man beats Jerry Monti, then an old lady named Florence calls into the show which results in a lot of audio difficulties as she begins to wonder if it’s a prank. Dr. Alfred Kissenbaum finally joins the show, and I’m going to guess this is another local New York theater actor but there’s some logic behind what he’s saying and doing. He explains he did his thesis on John Wayne’s affect on American culture, did work on Burt Reynolds, did his PhD on Clint Eastwood. He’s an expert in MASCULINITY, you see. You can also hear him being produced off-camera.
The Macho therapy session is a classic, highlighted by ol’ MACH playing free word association. It results in THIS, ALL OF THIS brilliance from Savage:
Doctor: Macho.
Savage: Macho RANDY SAVAGE, yeah, I am the true meaning of Macho and I cannot be denied.
Doctor: Interesting.
Savage: Interesting, yes I am, at different times, in everything and… I’m quick… don’t think too much man, otherwise you’re gonna be on the couch – APOLOGY… accepted.
Doctor: Pump.
Savage: PUMPING IRON, yeah, Hulk Hogan doesn’t have the only key to the gym you know. I am there every morning.. yeah.
Doctor: Gun.
Savage: Gun – fastest gun in the west, east, south, and north, yeah. All over the world, that’s the Macho Man Randy Savage.
Doctor: Muscle.
Savage: Muscle… yeah – don’t help me, don’t help me. See, that’s so easy it’s no problem.
Doctor: Belt.
Savage: BELT! Yeah, that’s what I’m gonna do to Hulk Hogan just to make him mad. No problem.
Doctor: Sweat.
Savage: Blood, sweat and tears all rolled into one and that’s why I got this… THE BELT.
Doctor: Kitten.
Savage: That’s what women are when I uh, look at em… like little baby kittens. I play with em, yeah, and then cast em aside… break their hearts, but don’t worry about me.
Doctor: Female.
Savage: Female, yeah, the race of people that admire and lust after the Macho Man Randy Savage… ask Elizabeth.
Doctor: Stud.
Savage: You’re looking at him right now in vivid living color, boy am I helping out human nature this is great I’m doing it again YEAH!
Doctor: Sucker.
Savage: Hulk Hogan! That was a good one… I beat you on that one, yeah, he’s the biggest one of all.
Doctor: OK, Randy, now this is the very last word. Ready? Animal.
Savage (now serious): What do you mean, Animal? Yeah. I know what you’re talking about, you’re talking about George Steele right there… that’s what you’re talking about right there… AND I COME IN HERE and be real nice to you, what are you talking about man? That was a real bad word. A man of my position cannot afford to look ridiculous at any time!
And he storms off.
Back on set, the doctor hypothesizes Savage’s problem is insecurity – that’s why he tears up paper, has a woman for a manager, and got into wrestling to begin with. Savage responds by throwing action figures at the doctor and gets serious: “Let me tell you something right now, don’t ever tell me what to do or embarrass me again.”
He tears his shirt off and yells for emphasis: “DON’T EVER DO THAT TO ME AGAIN!”
Worth Watching?: Absolutely
Tuesday Night Titans #92 (7/9/86)
The one with The Mating Game.
Yes, The Mating Game is back, this time with Jim Neidhart as the Bachelor. There are two attractive girls, then Fabulous Moolah – or, Ms. Clarabelle Dingum from Pond Scum, South Carolina. One of the attractive girls doesn’t seem to know how the game works, which creates some wonderful awkwardness. There’s a lot of bad sex puns too, like “I’m a piano and you can rub all over my keys.” Neidhart is reluctant to make a decision in the end, so they go with crowd vote and Moolah wins. Neidhart’s slow realization is tremendous: “What do you mean… what’s wrong? … Oh, what the hell, let’s get it on!”
That’s how the show ends.
It begins with Mean Gene Okerlund putting on his best tux and heading on-location to Tokyo, Japan, searching the streets for a rumored pair of masked giants called THE MACHINES. He finds a bank called Fuji Bank that causes him to marvel at how powerful Mr. Fuji is, and when he says “Konnichiwa” at a merchant stand they laugh at him. The search contineus…
There is an awesome British Bulldogs squash here over AJ Petruzzi & Bob Bradley, straight and to the point with their amazing assisted diving headbutt finish that he crowd goes wild for. The Bulldogs join the set with Captain Lou too where The Hart Foundation, Volkoff & Sheik, and The Killer Bees are named as top contenders to their Tag Team Titles. A few bulldogs get fed too, which isn’t exactly compelling TV.
Corporal Kirchner joins the show to demonstrate some military cooking, but Lord Alfred quickly takes over as he trained with her Majesty’s Service. Kirchner mentions him and Gene down “in the bush” together as Gene struggles not to react, and the cooking segment ends up feeling like time-killing. All the food ends up gross – haw haw.
Also, Bret Hart beats S.D. Jones in MSG with a BACKBREAKER.
Worth Watching?: No
Tuesday Night Titans #93 (7/16/86)
The one with King Kong Bundy.
Bundy had moved onto Hogan and was continuing to team with Big John Studd opposite the British Bulldogs and now the incoming Machines. He joins the show and is asked if it’s “all over,” to which he responds it’s just beginning – his WWF Magazine will be the highest selling and all his toys are sold out!
Mean Gene meets The Machines now, at a time when the suspended Andre the Giant was playing Giant Machine and they hadn’t yet settled on if the other one was named Big Machine or Super Machine. Gene side eyeing Andre under the mask is great, but knowing the nowhere this thing went cools down any footage that built it up.
New interviewer Ken Resnick gets a little love and sits down on the couch as Mean Gene brings up their history in Minnesota (AKA the AWA).
Tito Santana casually mentions he leaves for Mexico every few years to train as a bullfighter, which seems important. He beats Joe Mirto in a very solid squash and wants his IC Title back.
Iron Sheik and Nikolai Volkoff end the show, first with an interview where Sheik calls Dan Spivey “Danny Spicy.” They go outside where George the Camel is waiting, and doing the interview the camel keeps yelling which creates some fun TV. The camel also has issues standing up until Sheik finally gets on him.
Stupid, trainwreck-y fun.
Worth Watching?: No
Tuesday Night Titans #94 (7/23/86)
The one with a Macho Man Randy Savage impersonator.
The Paul Orndorff turn had aired just a few days before this, but TNT isn’t going all in on that until next week. Clips of the build-up are aired though, with Hogan missing Orndorff’s call.
This episode introduced a new backdrop, couches, and desk, a last gasp at something new before the show ended.
Gene asks right away where Alfred is, and it appears the show will begin without him as Macho Man Randy Savage and Elizabeth join. Savage squashes Eric Cooper in a match that features a great insane Captain Lou Albano inset promo, then a Savage impersonator joins the show. His balls are absolutely just sticking out of his spandex, and on the back of his shirt it says “RANDY WHO?” He calls himself the “Intercongenital Champion” before revealing himself as LORD ALFRED HAYES. I legit had no idea.
Infamous wrestling legend Billy Jack Haynes has come to the WWF, and he very quickly says hello to his dad who’s in a nursing home and says he misses and loves his wife very much. “Alllright,” Gene responds. He wrestles Rusty Brooks and pops off an awesome spinebuster.
Gorilla Monsoon and Bobby Heenan join the show to talk up the more prominent Prime Time Wrestling and discuss The Machines a bit, in which Bobby Heenan surveys the crowd asking if Giant Machine is Andre the Giant. Heenan buries the show after they discuss Gorilla’s shoes and Mean Gene throws to break: “Is there really more to come? You’re showing shoes! What’s next, socks?”
A guy with a horrible gay accent called Mr. Bruce tends to Adrian Adonis’ flowers to end the show as the WWF continues to struggle with showing any shred of decency. Mr. Bruce tells Gene that he “started as a child,” to which Gene responds “started what?” “DOING FLOWERS.”
“Keep your hands off me, ya fruit,” says Mean Gene Okerlund.
WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
Worth Watching?: No
Tuesday Night Titans #95 (7/30/86)
The one after Paul Orndorff’s attack on Hulk Hogan.
Everyone is commentating on this thing – Heenan, Studd, Tito, Pedro, JYD.
They show footage of the Heenan Family celebration backstage afterwards as Heenan and Studd gloat, just the cockiest bastards in the world as they talk shit about the MIA Andre the Giant and The Machines and Hulk Hogan. Things are riding high for the Heenan Family.
Tito Santana & Pedro Morales whooping jobber ass is SO over.
King Harley Race makes his first appearance on the TNT set where he says a line so cool it gets a pop: “The World Wrestling Federation is the place to be, or they wouldn’t have the King.”
Woof.
Worth Watching?: Yes
Tuesday Night Titans #96 (8/6/86)
The one with Hulk Hogan and Paul Orndorff.
This has pretty much the full recap of the Hogan/Orndorff feud up until now, though they weirdly make it look like Orndorff attacked Hogan after The Moondogs match where Orndorff first showed frustration and not the match after with Bundy and Studd. though this is one of the more famous and successful wrestling feuds I’ll still just make it publicly known that I thought they did a great job with it. There’s the usual WWF logic holes of the WWF Champ coming off like an asshole, but back then you didn’t question one thing The Hulkster did. Orndorff was being a bitch and now he’s back with Heenan – HE MUST PAY.
The Hogan promos in this era were an absolute trip – here he talks Orndorff fans being skinny and weak, Russian spies, patience, work ethic, milk, prayers, vitamins. “I was born with the power, brother… all these people here were born with the power… to choose between right and wrong, good and bad, hard work and laziness, friend and foe. And you know in this world you gotta be a follower man, you can’t be a leader – if your friend hits a telephone pole drinking man, and wipes out 8 people in the car, are you gonna say hey I wasn’t driving? You know, I was just ridin’ in the car. Orndorff, man, he was his own man – he made his own decisions. Even though Adrian Adonis stirred this whole pot up brother, I can only blame Paul Orndorff. You know, you can’t put this off on anybody else, Paul Orndorff is the man – he should’ve been a follower – I mean a leader, not a follower.” YEAH.
The Hogan/Orndorff stuff rightfully closes the show, while the show begins with Jimmy Jack Funk running out and demanding Tony D plays The Yellow Rose of Texas. “What do I look like, Mitch Miller?” protests Tony D in his one and only on-screen line before he relents. Jimmy Jack gets angry when Mean Gene calls him a twisted social misfit, to which Gene responds that “Violence is a tool of the ignorant.” Wrong business, pal.
Jimmy Jack and Hoss beat George Wells and Rudy Diamond in a squash match with a pretty amazing finish where Hoss just simply pushes Wells out of the ring onto the concrete floor and Wells just doesn’t get up as Rudy taps to a Texas Cloverleaf.
The Rougeau Brothers make their first appearance on TNT showing clips of them in Australia water skiing backward and stuff over dubbed island music. They apparently visited a nude beach, though they kept their bathing suits on for it – this gets boos from the TNT faithful. The finish an 18-minute match with The Moondogs is shown, and I can’t speak for the first 17 but the last minute is HOT.
Can’t believe Orndorff, man.
Worth Watching?: Yes
Tuesday Night Titans #97 (8/20/86)
The one with Mr. Fuji’s surprise.
Mr. Wonderful still wouldn’t join the set until next week, but this episode of TNT does feature The Flower Shop with Orndorff and Heenan where Orndorff re-introduces Heenan as his manager. It’s a hot angle that feels big time, and I am a mark for Bobby Heenan calling a guy the next Heavyweight Champion of the World.
Heenan and Bundy join the set, and Gene thinks things are just “howzie wowzie” for them. They discuss The Machines, and legitimate footage from New Japan complete with Japanese commentary is shown, though all it is is Andre applying a chokehold.
Chief Jay Strongbow and Bobo Brazil join the show and while Strongbow comes out in casual clothes Bobo comes out in his fucking bright blue wrestling tights. Some neat old school footage of the December 1982 MSG show is aired, with The Strongbow Brothers taking on Mr. Fuji and Mr. Saito. When Gene asks Chief Jay if he might come back, his response is simple: “No.” Footage of the April 1976 MSG show is also aired with Bobo Brazil (plus hair) winning a match with the Coco Butt. In a not fun bit of trivia, it’s the match that took place right after Stan Hansen broke Bruno’s neck.
Rotundo & Spivey, now The American Express, against Tiger Chung Lee & Les Thornton is one of those weird matches on the WWE Network that exists on THREE separate videos: TNT, Prime Time, Old School. It’s not terrible, but I fast-forwarded it the second and third times.
A Magnifcient Muraco squash from February 1985 that actually aired on TNT #21 is shown – how do they choose these things!?
Mr. Fuji introduces a “surprise” which ends up being a midget Mr. Fuji who is actually Little Tokyo. It’s revealed Fuji has been keeping little Mr. Fuji’s wages “because he’s a little man” and Fuji begins hitting him with a cane, so he responds with a little cane.
Little Tokyo runs away, shirtless, as the show ends.
Worth Watching?: No
Tuesday Night Titans #98 (9/10/86)
The one with Paul Orndorff and a lot of other stuff.
Ricky Steamboat inexplicably brings a komodo dragon to set that he can’t seem to get a grip on. It’s kinda funny seeing Ricky play all alpha male in the WWF, trying to be unfazed as the dragon crawls all over the floor and acting like some kind of expert on this reptile.
The Flower Shop with Bobby Heenan and Captain Lou Albano is aired here, with Bobby Heenan inspecting The Machines to determine their identity. It’s half cheesy and half GOLD. “How many Machines are there!?”
Mean Gene and Alfred sport Confederate flag jackets and hats on a return from break, to which Alfred eadpans “Isn’t that the Union Jack?” Dick Slater – THE REBEL – joins the show and rambles on while carrying the Confederate flag. Gene interrupts him to throw to a match where Slater looks pretty bad. He wasn’t this bad his whole run but the run also never took off, maybe partially because of the in-ring skill but also probably because of The Rebel shit. The match also has a completely random Superstar Billy Graham inset promo from the desert on Hoss Funk, building to a Superstar return that was not to be.
“I don’t underestimate him, I just don’t particularly care for the man.” – Mean Gene Okerlund on Jimmy Hart
Macho Man and Elizabeth join the set, Macho looking like a centerfold with his purple cut-off shirt and championship on his shoulder. Before they join the “Lifestyles of the Rich & Famous” segment from Savage and Elizabeth’s Coliseum Home Video is aired, and on set Savage accuses Gene of maybe possibly stealing a few pieces of gold.
Then – MORE MACHO MAN AUDIENCE Q&A!!!
This isn’t as gold as the first one, but it’s still gold and the crowd is possibly loaded. Macho Man and Elizabeth are asked if they’re related, Savage tells a girl she got her pictures but she says she’s a Jesse Ventura gal, a guy asks Savage about the pressure of holding the IC Title while going after the World Title and Macho seems fond of it, and Savage asks a lady if she has Animal Steele’s turnbuckle stuffings down her shirt as she smacks her tits around.
Finally, FINALLY “Mr. Wonderful” Paul Orndorff appears on set with Bobby “The Brain” Heenan, as Heenan removes Orndorff’s robe to reveal bike shorts and swim trunks with flip flops. They show more footage of the feud before going back to Orndorff, who was on an absolute RUN here. It’s amazing to know he was kind of hurt during this but pushed through to get those paydays. He cuts a great, confident promo where he actually gets cheers when he says the people want him to be the WWF Champ, though when returning from break Gene says he thinks that was his family.
Stacked show.
Worth Watching?: No
Tuesday Night Titans #99 (9/24/86)
The one with Jake the Snake. Also, the last one.
Jake Roberts is cool as hell, like Luke Perry with a mustache and command of reptiles. He has this exchange with Mean Gene right away:
Okerlund: I don’t think I particularly care for your philosophy.
Roberts: You know, I have morals… but the morals that I have fit ME – they fit what I do. If I do something I can make it right in my own mind. I don’t have to make it right in yours because I’m not trying to make you happy.
Then, there’s a Jake the Snake Audience Q&A, and God bless whoever decided this because I would’ve been kind of bummed if we got through all the TNT’s with Jake the Snake not trying his hand at this. He’s asked when he will be putting Ricky Steamboat out of his misery, what he thinks of his old rival Dick Slater, and what he fed the snake today. He answers that last one “nothing,” then says it was nothing yesterday and the day before that and the day before that. Then he laughs. Incredible stuff.
George “The Animal” Steele joins the show, though not before he gets stuck in the men’s room for a bit.
The final bit of TNT is centered around Classy Freddie Blassie and Slick, who have entered a business agreement in which newcomer Slick is going to take control of Blassie’s wrestling assets. They join the show and Gene grills Slick on if he’s managed professional wrestlers before. Then he gets to the real question: “Have you managed girls before?” Slick retorts, “If your mom had known you were gonna be a bald-headed man, she would’ve killed ya when you was a baby!” SLICK.
They throw to a Hercules Hernandez squash of Tony Atlas where Slick trips Atlas with a cane for the win. Then Iron Sheik & Nikolai Volkoff join the set as Slick discusses his plan to take back the WWF Tag Team Titles. I think Blassie name drops Rikidozan at some point as he rants here.
Finally, Nikolai Volkoff brings a bear to the set.
Worth Watching?: Yes
The end.
