Captain Lou’s Review : NJPW G1 Climax Day 16 (8/8/2019)

Toru Yano vs. Taichi – G1 Climax (Block B)

As this tournament winds down, you almost have to appreciate the sheer audacity of putting Yano, Taichi and Jay White in the same block. He’s not even trying to hide it anymore: Gedo truly hates us. Just kidding, this was actually kind of great. The crowd helped these boys redefine the meaning of Strong Style by chanting ‘’HEY!’’ during a turnbuckle pad throwing exchange and Yano pulled his best finish of the tournament when he trapped Taichi and Kanemaru together inside the ring apron. **1/2

Tetsuya Naito vs. Jeff Cobb – G1 Climax (Block B)

While this wasn’t great or anything, it was probably the most logical portrayal of Jeffrey Cobb from this whole tournament. Naito seemed to be fucking around early on with his sumo poses, but he’s one of the few guys in this G1 to figure out the optimal Jeff Cobb match layout. He bumped like a Pinball Wizard, sold a lot and had to take shortcuts every time he went on offense. And thus, Cobb came off as an immovable suplex monster instead of a dorky PWG spot bro. Thank you for your service, Tetsuya Naito. Really enjoyed Cobb using his power advantage to cut off all of Naito’s signature spots and literally sending the guy airborne with the wildest F5 variation I’ve ever seen. A pleasant wrestling match. ***1/4

Hirooki Goto vs. Jon Moxley – G1 Climax (Block B)

Witness the duality of THE MOX as he goes from throwing a guardrail like a madman to shaking hands with a wheelchair-bound fan. This man is a Stan Hansen you can be friends with. I love it, and I loved these 8 minutes of professional wrestling. Moxley fully embraced the Shin Nihon spirit and worked a Baseline Hirooki Goto match that was nearly all forearms and lariats. That’s all you really need, man. The Goto win out of nowhere was tremendous but my favorite part of the match was Moxley clearly trying to impress William Regal with that double-arm suplex into chickenwing armlock combo. ***1/4

Juice Robinson vs. Jay White – G1 Climax (Block B)

Theory time: Leg Work Jay White is the best Jay White. For real, Jay’s leg matches tie together all of his best character traits in a fairly-compelling package and add so much focus to his otherwise meandering offense. This was a prime example of that: I loved him going constantly back to the leg to stay in control of the match and keep The Juice from getting’ loose. Plus, I’m a big fan of his ground dragon screw game. It’s like he took everything that Tanahashi (probably) taught him in the dojo and brought it to the dark side.

Major props to Juice as well, because such a selling-heavy match might not have worked as well with a lesser opponent. The man put in a flawless babyface performance: impeccable limb selling, larger than life emoting to rally the entire place behind him and some absolutely FEARLESS BUMPS. The crowd seemed legit shocked by the way he threw himself right in that guardrail after Jay’s over-the-top Backdrop.

Slight nitpick: I wish Jay would get rid of half of his head-drop heavy offense and focus on getting over the other half. Other than that, I even dug the ref bump finish as the chairshot to the leg wrapped up the match perfectly. A whole lot of pretty smart wrestling from two dudes with tight chemistry. ****

Tomohiro Ishii vs. Shingo Takagi – G1 Climax (Block B)

While August 8 might be a historic date for New Japan, these two bruisers clearly had another promotion in mind for most of this match. You know I’m talking about that WRESTLE AND ROMANCE, baby. Shingo and Ishii went out there to establish the true heir to Tenryu’s kenka pro-wrestling dynasty and they went about it in the most logical way possible: beating the absolute fuck out of each other.

Lariats, chops and headbutts all over the place – but in true Tenryu fashion, proving their toughness in brutal strike exchanges wasn’t enough for these two. They also had to be complete dicks about it. Ishii decided to no-sell half of Shingo’s forearms just to piss him off and Shingo responded by rupturing his fucking eardrum. Seems reasonable.

As always, the devil is in the deets’ with these two: it’s the selling and theatrics that pushed their bulldozer collision to the next level. Stuff like Ishii walking head first into Shingo’s forearms and Takagi selling his arm like he’s hitting against a brick wall, or the Ode to Kawada Failed No-Sell attempt during the back and forth Backdrop exchange. This is what makes it still real to me, damnit.

My only knock on this match is that it should’ve happened at Korakuen Hall. Ishii and Shingo had the kind of fight to the death you’ve always dreamed they would have, but the crowd didn’t treat it as anything special until the last 5-10 minutes or so. Serious bummer, considering this was the Mother of All Slug Festivals between the two toughest bastards in New Japan, on the anniversary of Fujinami and Inoki going broadway. DO BETTER, YOKOHAMA. ****1/2

Captain Lou’s G1 Climax 29 Match Rankings

1. Tetsuya Naito vs. Shingo Takagi (Block B) – ****3/4, 8/4/19
2. Hiroshi Tanahashi vs. Kota Ibushi (Block A) – ****1/2, 8/3/19
3. Kazuchika Okada vs. Will Ospreay (Block A) – ****1/2, 7/20/19
4. Tomohiro Ishii vs. Shingo Takagi (Block B) – ****1/2, 8/8/19
5. Kota Ibushi vs. Will Ospreay (Block A) – ****1/2, 7/18/19
6. Tomohiro Ishii vs. Jon Moxley (Block B) – ****1/2, 7/19/19
7. Tetsuya Naito vs. Tomohiro Ishii (Block B) – ****1/4, 7/24/19
8. Hiroshi Tanahashi vs. KENTA (Block A) – ****1/4, 7/14/19
9. Kazuchika Okada vs. Hiroshi Tanahashi (Block A) – ****1/4, 7/6/19
10. EVIL vs. Will Ospreay (Block A) – ****1/4
11. Hirooki Goto vs. Tomohiro Ishii (Block B) – ****1/4, 8/1/19
12. Kazuchika Okada vs. SANADA (Block A) – ****1/4, 8/3/19
13. Tetsuya Naito vs. Jon Moxley (Block A) – ****1/4, 7/28/19
14. Tomohiro Ishii vs. Juice Robinson (Block B) – ****1/4, 7/28/19
15. Juice Robinson vs. Shingo Takagi (Block B) – ****, 7/13/19
16. Kota Ibushi vs. Lance Archer (Block A) – ****, 7/27/19
17. Tomohiro Ishii vs. Jay White (Block B) – ****, 7/15/19
18. Juice Robinson vs. Jay White (Block B) – ****, 8/8/19
19. Will Ospreay vs. KENTA (Block A) – ****, 8/7/19
20. Kota Ibushi vs. EVIL (Block A) – ****, 7/13/19
21. SANADA vs. Zack Sabre Jr. (Block A) – ****, 7/6/19
22. Hiroshi Tanahashi vs. Lance Archer (Block A) – ****, 7/20/19
23. Kazuchika Okada vs. KENTA (Block A) – ****, 7/27/19
24. Hiroshi Tanahashi vs. EVIL (Block A) – ****, 7/30/19
25. Kota Ibushi vs. Zack Sabre Jr (Block A) – ****, 8/7/19
26. Shingo Takagi vs. Jay White (Block B) – ****, 7/28/19
27. Will Ospreay vs. Lance Archer (Block A) – ***3/4, 7/6/19
28. Jon Moxley vs. Shingo Takagi (Block B) – ***3/4, 7/24/19
29. Kazuchika Okada vs. EVIL (Block A) – ***3/4, 8/7/19
30. Kazuchika Okada vs. Zack Sabre Jr. (Block A) – ***3/4, 7/13/19
31. Shingo Takagi vs. Taichi (Block B) – ***3/4, 7/19/19
32. Hiroshi Tanahashi vs. Zack Sabre Jr. (Block A) – ***3/4, 7/18/19
33. Will Ospreay vs. Zack Sabre Jr. (Block A) – ***3/4, 7/30/19
34. Tetsuya Naito vs. Hirooki Goto (Block B) – ***3/4, 7/19/19
35. EVIL vs. Zack Sabre Jr. (Block B) – ***3/4, 7/27/19
36. Jon Moxley vs. Jay White (Block B) – ***3/4, 8/3/19
37. Zack Sabre Jr. vs Lance Archer (Block B) – ***1/2, 8/3/19
38. Jeff Cobb vs. Shingo Takagi (Block B) – ***1/2, 8/1/19
39. EVIL vs. SANADA (Block A) – ***1/2, 7/18/19
40. Jeff Cobb vs. Taichi (Block B) – ***1/2, 7/28/19
41. Jon Moxley vs. Taichi (Block B) – ***1/2, 7/13/19
42. Will Ospreay vs. SANADA (Block A) – ***1/2, 7/13/19
43. Kota Ibushi vs. SANADA (Block A) – ***1/2, 7/20/19
44. KENTA vs. EVIL (Block A) – ***1/2, 7/20/19
45. Kazuchika Okada vs. Lance Archer – ***1/2, 7/30/19
46. Hiroshi Tanahashi vs. SANADA (Block A) – ***1/2, 7/27/19
47. Tetsuya Naito vs. Taichi (Block B) – ***1/2, 7/15/19
48. Juice Robinson vs. Hirooki Goto (Block B) – ***1/2, 7/15/19
49. Hirooki Goto vs. Jay White (Block B) – ***1/2, 7/13/19
50. Kota Ibushi vs. KENTA (Block A) – ***1/2, 7/6/19
51. Hirooki Goto vs. Jeff Cobb (Block B) – ***1/4, 8/4/19
52. Hirooki Goto vs. Taichi (Block B) – ***1/4, 7/24/19
53. Tetsuya Naito vs. Jeff Cobb (Block B) – ***1/4, 8/8/19
54. Tetsuya Naito vs. Toru Yano (Block A) – ***1/4, 7/13/19
55. SANADA vs. Lance Archer (Block A) – ***1/4, 8/7/19
56. Hirooki Goto vs. Jon Moxley (Block A) – ***1/4, 8/8/19
57. Tomohiro Ishii vs. Toru Yano (Block A) – ***1/4, 8/4/19
58. Hiroshi Tanahashi vs. Bad Luck Fale (Block A) – ***1/4, 8/7/19
59. Tomohiro Ishii vs. Jeff Cobb (Block A) – ***1/4, 7/13/19
60. Tetsuya Naito vs. Juice Robinson (Block A) – ***1/4, 8/1/19
61. EVIL vs. Bad Luck Fale (Block A) – ***, 7/6/19
62. Juice Robinson vs. Toru Yano (Block B) – ***, 7/24/19
63. Toru Yano vs. Jon Moxley (Block B) – ***, 8/1/19
64. Toru Yano vs. Shingo Takagi (Block A) – ***, 7/15/19
65. Jay White vs. Taichi (Block A) – ***, 8/1/19
66. KENTA vs. Lance Archer (Block A) – **3/4, 7/18/19
67. Kazuchika Okada vs. Bad Luck Fale (Block A) – ***, 7/18/19
68. SANADA vs. KENTA (Block A) – **3/4, 7/30/19
69. Juice Robinson vs. Taichi (Block B) – **3/4, 8/4/19
70. Jay White vs. Jeff Cobb (Block B) – **3/4, 7/24/19
71. Juice Robinson vs. Jeff Cobb (Block B) – **3/4, 7/19/19
72. Lance Archer vs. Bad Luck Fale (Block A) – **3/4, 7/13/19
73. Toru Yano vs. Taichi (Block A) – **1/2, 8/8/19
74. Jon Moxley vs. Jeff Cobb (Block B) – **1/2, 7/15/19
75. Kota Ibushi vs. Bad Luck Fale (Block A) – **1/2
76. KENTA vs. Bad Luck Fale (Block A) – 8/3/19 **1/2
77. Will Ospreay vs. Bad Luck Fale (Block A) – **1/2, 7/27/19
78. Zack Sabre Jr. vs Bad Luck Fale (Block B) – **1/2, 7/20/19
79. Hirooki Goto vs. Toru Yano (Block B) – **1/4, 7/28/19
80. Jay White vs. Toru Yano (Block B) – *3/4, 7/19/19