Not many WWF matches at this point were great, but you show me a picture of anybody of note and I will tell you exactly who that guy is. The wrestlers had shticks, were big and colorful, and did weird shit on TNT. It’s cliche today, but the WWF really made superstars in 1985. The presentation more than made up for any lack of in-ring prowess from the WWF’s roster in 1985, and Vince McMahon’s hiring spree meant a whole lot of interesting characters were joining the show. Here’s more about them.
The Main Event
Hulk Hogan, Mr. T, Andre the Giant, Bobby “The Brain” Heenan, Rowdy Roddy Piper with Cowboy Bob, Macho Man Randy Savage, “Mr. Wonderful” Paul Orndorff, Wendi Richter, Cyndi Lauper with Captain Lou – these were The Stars, the chosen few headlining this big push into the stratosphere.
Heenan, Piper, Savage, and Ventura in particular are absolute masters of 1985 professional wrestling – every single thing they do is worth watching. Tito Santana and Ricky Steamboat carry the ring work, while the legends of Hogan and Andre continue to grow.
When 1985 rolls around, Hulk Hogan has held the WWF Championship for a year. The WWF in 1985 carried on its’ long tradition of there being One Top Guy – first Bruno, then Backlund, now Hulk. He had his rivals and a cast of top guys around him, but his buddies like JYD or Hillbilly Jim weren’t coming after his strap, and the guys who did come after it were always left staring at the lights.
Hogan was THE MAN in 1985, and he takes the ball and sprints with it, immediately being presented as and presenting himself as a true larger than life superhero and unstoppable wrestling good guy. He takes on ALLLL the jerks – big jerks like King Kong Bundy and Big John Studd, foreign jerks like Iron Sheik and Nikolai Volkoff, a jerk who eventually stops being a jerk like Paul Orndorff. He also develops a true cultural ICON persona where he’s encouraging kids to be physically fit and fighting for AMERICA against the god damned Commies. It doesn’t hurt that he is an incredibly amazing big time promo, spitting out some psychotic and over-powering shit during this year.
Also … he is a REALLY GOOD WRESTLER. Maybe he can’t go tit-for-tat running the ropes with the workhorses, maybe he simplifies wrestling down to the basics, and maybe once you’ve seen a hundred of his matches you’ve seen them all, but the Hogan formula is perfect for a world where Bruno Sammartino and Bob Backlund were the most recent top dogs. Plus, he sells his ASS off. It’s very good, and feels perfect for the moment it is in.
You can’t blame the WWF for pushing him so hard, but while there are a bunch of awesome things going on in the midcard, the force of Hulk Hogan does take the air out of them a bit. Any of the midcard acts they build up either stop by for a few fun angles and will never go near Hogan, or run a loop where they job to Hogan. That’s how this worked though – who said 1985 needed anything more complicated? This has always been a WWF trope, and it happens here – Hogan is THE GUY and he is untouchable, and everybody else is just play-fighting for the chance to face him (and some guys don’t even bother).
Almost anything Hogan touches in 1985 is a highlight, both because he only really touches the big stuff and because his charisma and over-ness is a sight to see. Hogan vs. Piper from MTV’s War to Settle the Score is aired on TNT 3/8/85 and while it’s a legitimately great match on its’ own, it leads into SUCH a massive angle, with tons of star power (Lauper! Mr. T!) and the crowd eating everything up. All these guys were just crazy shit over. It makes you not just hyped for WrestleMania, it makes you want to time travel back to 1985 and see it all happen LIVE.
Hogan spends part of the year as a motivational trainer for Hillbilly Jim. His training segments with Jim on TNT 1/4/85 and TNT 1/18/19 are good campy fun, while his training segments with Mr. T on TNT #25 – 28 are pretty awesome as Hulk is presented and comes off as a bigger star than T. All his promos – whether in training or on the couch on TNT, are larger and life and so awesome. His matches with Orndorff at the Maple Leaf Gardens on 4/21/85 and vs. Cowboy Bob Orton on SNME 5/11/85 are solid, while the Mania main event and the Flag Match on Saturday Night’s Main Event 10/5/85 vs. Nikolai Volkoff are awesome.
Also, he randomly wrestled some main event matches in New Japan during this run! What WAS this year!?
Hogan certainly was THE GUY, but you also can’t talk WWF in 1985 without mentioning Rowdy Roddy Piper. Hogan faced a rotating cast of characters on top, but Hogan vs. Piper was THE feud that was chosen to present the WWF to the WORLD. These two were both on another level as promos and charismatic ring warriors. It was Hulk Hogan, the All-American decked in bright yellow or white, with overly fired up promos and superhero muscles taking on Roddy Piper, decked in a white t-shirt that says ‘HOT ROD’ and a SKIRT, with his insane, detached, slightly racist jackass madman persona.
Piper was the yin to Hogan’s yang and had a career year in 1985. It might be my favorite work of his ever, as he hadn’t yet bought into his own hype and just goes balls out with psychotic promos and heated brawls opposite everyone from Paul Orndorff to Tonga Kid to Hillbilly Jim. Piper’s appearances on TNT during this era are all worth watching, just classic work from an absolute master of the professional wrestling promo. He had introduced Piper’s Pit in 1984 and built a legend when he smashed a coconut over Jimmy Snuka’s head, and he continues it into 1985 where it becomes the catalyst for a few big angles during the year. Piper’s angles and promos with Mr. T are incredible stuff too. There’s an essence of goofiness to Mr. T participating in wrestling, but Piper just talks you into thinking this is just the coolest thing ever. You can tell Vince completely trusts Piper’s instincts as a performer too.
The presentation of Piper also gets a boost as he takes Cowboy Bob Orton on as his bodyguard and nicknames him “Ace.” Orton injures his arm in February 1985 against Superfly Snuka (the same MSG show that had the Hogan/Piper War to Settle the Score match), and the injury causes him to persistently wear a cast around his arm, one of the all-time classic heel wrestling gimmicks. Orton would weaponize his cast during matches, as the commentators wondered aloud how long it was actually taking his arm to heal.
I need to stress it again – everything Piper touches in 1985 is gold. Turn on anything he does and you are transported into a special time for the professional wrestling. He kicks down Cyndi Lauper and sets the Mania main event into motion on TNT 2/15/85, The War to Settle the Score match and angle on TNT 3/8/85, Piper’s Pit at MSG with Mr. T on TNT 3/26/85, everything that is about the build-up to Mania is GOLD. The live Piper’s Pit with Orndorff on SNME 5/11 is a tremendous full-blown babyface turn for Orndorff, as he finally attacks Piper. He has an epic brawl with Orndorff on SNME 10/5/85, and carries The Hillbillies through a Piper’s Pit on SNME 11/2. His Halloween segment on SNME 11/2 is a true treasure too.
Piper buries Orndorff and quacks at a doctor investigating Cow Boy Bob’s arm on TNT 5/10/85, hosts TNT 10/11/85, and rants on action figures and plays Ebenezer Scrooge on TNT 12/20/85. Another layer of the Piper character is revealed on TNT 8/9/85 when he takes Vince and Alfred to his ancestral home in Scotland and appears to have kidnapped several men. The wrestling is fun too, though the mic made the legend: a brawl with Tonga Kid on TNT 1/4/85, the brawl with Orndorff, the Mania main event, a match with Bruno Sammartino on Boston Garden 12/7/85. This guy was ON.
Rock n’ Wrestling and Cyndi Lauper continued into the early months of 1985 and it is all paid off at WrestleMania in March, which started 1985 off HOT. Rock n’ Wrestling was a massive win – it got the WWF on MTV, got them in circles with popular celebrities, got them Cyndi Lauper, got them a cartoon and an album. It is also where Piper excelled as a performer – him being such an asshole to Lauper is what really catapulted him as a top guy. And it actually got some buzz for the women’s division, even if it wasn’t followed up on. To her credit, Cyndi Lauper was a PERFORMER too – completely dialed in as a character but also just enough disconnected from the wrestling world to appear like something special. All the big Hogan/Piper angles above have her doing master work.
“Mr. Wonderful” Paul Orndorff is the other guy Vince lights a fire under in 1985. It’s pretty crazy that outside of maybe the Macho Man push and stuff during Mania season, the Paul Orndorff face turn is the biggest angle Vince runs in 1985. Orndorff starts the year off being managed by Bobby Heenan and buddies with Rowdy Roddy Piper, and saying some very mean things about Mr. T. He teams with Piper against Hulk Hogan and Mr. T in the main event of the first WrestleMania and takes the pin after Orton mistakenly hits him with the cast. Hogan tries to help Orndorff get up, but Orndorff pushes him away. Over the next couple months, they’d wrestle each other, but Orndorff would show respect to Hogan.
On TNT 4/26/85 Orndorff gets sick and tired of Heenan and fires him, HUMILIATING HIM. This led to Piper’s Pit on SNME, where Orndorff made the full turn by going after Piper. Orndorff then went on to have some crazy-ass brawls with Piper and was the 2nd or 3rd top good guy in the WWF. Highlights of this run are Orndorff’s swagger with Piper on TNT 3/8/85, firing Heenan on #31, the face turn on SNME 5/11, the great brawl with Piper on SNME 10/5, and the babyface run in general. He was ready to be a STAR.
Mr. T‘s run really can’t be understated either. He’s a part of all the big angles mentioned above, plus WrestleMania obviously, and stays around until May to be in Hogan’s corner on the first Saturday Night’s Main Event against Cowboy Bob. He was no Jushin Thunder Liger, but the WWF used his celebrity kind of perfectly – big angles that rely on his presence, made Hogan look like an even bigger star, and a well-laid out WrestleMania main event that is one of the finer examples of Big Time Sports Entertainment there is.
Andre the Giant meanwhile had slowed down as a performer but is still clearly at the very top of the WWF food chain. Andre usually headlined the shows Hogan wasn’t on, and while he wasn’t very mobile he was still Andre the fucking Giant. For most of the year he was embroiled in a feud with his WrestleMania opponents Big John Studd and Bobby “The Brain” Heenan, along with newcomer King Kong Bundy, a feud which led in September to “The Collosal Jostle” at Madison Square Garden where Andre squared off with Bundy. Andre being used to build up a guy for Hogan sure is an interesting thing to look back on. He wasn’t pulling out a ton of must-see stuff at this point, but it’s still cool to watch a point in time where a guy was so over and had so much credibility that even his fake-ass wrestling had people going nuts.
All of Andre’s TNT appearances are tremendous. TNT 2/1/85 has the Andre haircut angle where it just feels shocking to see big Andre go down, while Patera shows you could still work around him in the ring on TNT 3/22/85. The true setup for Andre/Studd at Mania on TNT 3/22/85 with Andre getting hot at Vince is awesome too. He’s a part of a fun 6-man at MSG 3/17/85, and an angle where Bundy and Studd lay him out on TNT 9/27/85 is the good stuff.
Big John Studd and King Kong Bundy (along with their manager Bobby Heenan) round out the upper midcard for the WWF at this point, two big imposing guys who could go – maybe Bundy more than Studd. Studd was almost as immobile as Andre at this point, but a very good promo who had built-in credibility considering he was like nine feet tall. King Kong Bundy meanwhile is straight-up awesome. He first shows up in early 1985 managed by Jimmy Hart, but is soon acquired by Bobby “The Brain” Heenan to go after Andre.
Bundy is one of the perfect heels – he has such a scary look, a big hulking pale house of a bald man who wears a black singlet. It is downright terrifying and a total contrast from the normally colorful WWF of 1985. But when not in the ring, he can cut a great promo, too. Some monsters just go for scary, but Bundy almost had a little sense of humor to him (check out him trying wigs on on TNT 4/26/85). It was unique and it worked. Bundy essentially enters the territory to be built up for The Hulkster and just does a heck of a job during it.
The angle with Studd and Ken Patera cutting Andre’s hair from 1984 airs on TNT 2/1/85 and is a classic, and there’s a legitimately great Studd promo on TNT 3/15/85 with him bringing the go-home HEAT to Andre. The big sternum-crushing angle with Studd and Bundy attacking Andre is on TNT 9/27/85, and more strong build-up is on TNT 10/18/85. Bundy could also bring it in the ring – great squash on MSG 3/17/85, and a good tag at Maple Leaf 11/10/85.
The Midcard
Santana/Valentine the big Intercontinental Title feud that lasts for the first half of the year, or at least until Valentine moves into a tag team. At one point during the summer, he destroys the IC Title belt that Santana just won and it is ON. Valentine works JYD at WrestleMania so they feud for a bit, but Hammer and Santana were carrying the bulk of the house shows. When Valentine joins up with Brutus Beefcake as the Dream Team, Tito goes on to defend the IC Title against all kinds of folks – Sheik, Ventura, Barry O!
These guys had great chemistry – Tito was in his prime as a babyface who does all the template stuff of a great babyface, selling his ass off and being all fired up and making comebacks at all the right times. Valentine meanwhile brings such a unique 1980s charisma, a stoic brick house of a man who might work an armbar for five minutes but will also give a deer in the headlights look after a chop or take a Flair flop bump on his face and make you realize that he is a genius. The title destruction angle is shown on TNT 7/26/85, but the feud here gets more focus on the Old School Shows – singles match on MSG 3/17/85, an amazing tag with The Dream Team vs. Santana & Steamboat (a real dream team) on Maple Leaf Gardens 4/21/85. Santana also has a great match vs. Macho Man on SNME 11/2.
One of the pillars of WWF’s success – Macho Man Randy Savage – debuts in 1985. As his theme music will attest, Savage gets all the Pomp and Circumstance – all of the WWF’s managers negotiate over the rights to manage him until Savage introduces his own manager, Elizabeth, and Savage is on TNT immediately calling out Hulk Hogan and spouting about Macho Madness. He’d quickly lose to Hogan, but only on the house shows – never on TV. No – he was a STAR on TV. Savage instantly becomes a player and the WWF as a whole is better for it – fun squashes, epic promos, and some of the better in-ring action available from the WWF.
I’ve always loved Macho Man Randy Savage, but for the big matches and angles I’ve known him for. Seeing how he handles a quick squash match a month into his WWF employment is downright delightful. His 3-match performance at The Wrestling Classic is special – not just fun fast-paced wrestling, but star-making stuff. Savage is like a guy from another planet when he comes in… he inserts SO MUCH JUICE into The Product and everything he does is gold. His appearances on TNT #42, #49, #54 and #59 are must-watch. His match vs. Tito on SNME 11/2 is must-watch. His matches with Steamboat at The Wrestling Classic and on Boston Garden 12/6/85 – MUST-WATCH. Hogan and Piper carry the load, but Savage is right there ready to take over.
Terry Funk shows up over the summer too and just talks his way into being the most compelling force in the WWF. Funk has had a lot of different runs in wrestling and mid-80s WWF tobacco spitting cartoon character managed by Jimmy Hart is as good as any. He cuts wild and crazy promos, brands jobbers after his matches, and has a feud with Junkyard Dog that leads to an all-time great match on Saturday Night’s Main Event. Funk’s shtick melded into the larger-than-life WWF model really is fascinating to watch. His segments at the Silver Dollar Saloon on TNT 7/26/85 and 8/16/85 are great, and there’s an awesome squash of Paul Roma on #46. His match with Junkyard Dog on SNME 11/2/85 is an absolute classic too, a master class in every movement meaning something.
Junkyard Dog indeed comes into the territory in the summer of 1984 and is another pretty immediate success, over as all hell and gaining national cult status when he drops the “Grab Them Cakes” track on The Wrestling Album. JYD does like three moves and is the #2 most over guy in the company. He gets the IC Title match at Mania, has the great feud with Funk, and ends up winning The Wrestling Classic tournament. I can’t say any of his TNT stuff is hot, but the guy is #OVER and it makes even his stupid matches kind of fun to watch.
The WWF’s in-ring product takes an uptick as Ricky Steamboat comes in to round out the midcard, dubbed Ricky “The Dragon” Steamboat. He is the other classic babyface around alongside Tito Santana, and they even team up on occasion which is awesome. Steamboat’s first real big feud is with Magnificent Muraco, and it results in a wild angle where Muraco and his manager Mr. Fuji hang Steamboat with a tie over the top rope on TNT 8/2/85. He comes off as kind of a geek on TNT, outside of fighting ninjas (!!!) on TNT 8/23/85, but he’s also a total dreamboat. And the matches man – oh MAN. Steamboat doesn’t have a reputation as the greatest babyface of all-time for nothing. The tag with Tito against the Dream Team, the matches with Savage at The Wrestling Classic and Boston Garden 12/7/85, even the Kung Fu Challenge with Mr. Fuji SNME 11/2/85 are all the good stuff. Even his squashes have such a speed and finesse to them – he is SO good.
Magnificent Muraco has returned after a hiatus throughout 1984, now managed by Mr. Fuji. It’s a great, weird pair – there’s Muraco’s laid back mean beach bum character contrasted with Mr. Fuji’s over-the-top EEEEVIL management. Muraco won the first ever King of the Ring tournament, defeating Iron Sheik in the finals, and headlined a few house shows versus Hogan. Later in the year, Muraco and Fuji enter themselves in wrestling infamy when Muraco tries to become an actor, which leads to the infamous Fuji Vice sketch. 1985 sees all kinds of “Fuji” sketches – Fuji General (TNT 9/27/85), Fuji Bandito (TNT 10/18/85), and Fuji Chan (TNT 12/6/85). They are all terrible and also all wonderful. The aforementioned with Steamboat is good too. Muraco’s squashes on TNT are also kind of fascinating to watch – they’re pretty slow and ugly, but have this roughness to it that I dug.
Wendi Richter got hot briefly at the start of the year with the Rock n’ Wrestling stuff but it did not sustain, partly because she was not very good and partly because Vince just phased her out HARD and OK’d a title change without her knowledge, in the infamous “Spider Lady” incident in November 1985 (TNT 12/6/85), where that scumbag prostitution ringleader Fabulous Moolah wore a mask and beat her with a fast count cradle to force her to relinquish the title.
Guys of the WWF’s past like Tony Atlas, Rocky Johnson and Ivan Putski were kind of around, but mostly to put over the new era. Even Bruno Sammartino stopped by at times, either working a feud with Piper or awkwardly talking up or teaming with his wrestler son.
Jesse “The Body” Ventura had semi-retired in late-1984 and becomes one of the voice’s of WWE in 1985 as a color commentator. He hosts the MSG shows with Gorilla Monsoon, Prime Time Wrestling with Gorilla and Jack Reynolds, and Saturday Night’s Main Event with Vince McMahon. Ventura’s ever-presence is one of the things that helps make the WWF what it is in 1985 and throughout the 80s – the pazzaz, the one-liners, the rants, the outfits, the credibility. He and Gorilla Monsoon become the voice of the 1980s and we are all the better for it. Ventura also puts his boots back on a few times, working Tito Santana or teaming with Randy Savage. He kind of moves like a stiffer Big John Studd, but he’s still Jesse “The Body” Ventura.
Jimmy “Superfly” Snuka had made a brief return after a stint in rehab, re-kindling his feud with Roddy Piper and being Hogan and Mr. T’s corner man at WrestleMania. He’s only around for the first half of the year, before leaving for the greener pastures of late-80s AWA. He’ll be back by 1989.
Towards the end of the year, George “The Animal” Steele goes from creepy mean oaf to lovable kind oaf, and Captain Lou Albano and him have an affiliation which includes one of the more insane TNT segments ever, where Steele gets shock treatment on TNT 8/2/85. Steele’s face turn on SNME 5/11/85 is well done.
After an initial push, Hillbilly Jim was recovering from a leg injury, so in came his Uncle Elmer and Cousin Junior. The Hillbillies are pretty terrible at wrestling but I dunno, maybe somebody enjoyed this goofy bullshit back in the day. In addition to dancing and dropping their butts on people, they actually feuded with Roddy Piper later in the year in a feud that only Piper could make compelling.
The Tag Teams
Iron Sheik and Nikolai Volkoff are a constant wonderful mid-80s presence as an upper midcard tag team, with Nikolai Volkoff singing the Russian National Anthem before matches to thunderous boos and Iron Sheik cursing everybody and throwing fools around, all the while Classy” Freddie Blassie gloated in his sequined jacket and puffy pants. They win the WWF Tag Team Titles at WrestleMania, acting as a perfect opposition for the fired up young babyface tag team The U.S. Express, who eventually regain the titles on TNT 7/19/85 in a fun match. Volkoff famously works Hogan in a Flag Match on SNME 10/5/85. Their TNT appearances on TNT #24, #26, and #47 are gold. Scary Iron Sheik post-Mania on TNT 4/5/85 is tremendous, too. Guy was ready for another big run!
The U.S. Express of Barry Windham & Mike Rotundo mostly anchors the 1985 tag division either chasing or winning the Tag Titles. Windham & Rotundo were a good team and had super hot matches -Windham especially was a great fired up babyface and Rotundo an awesome face-in-peril, but they had no real chemistry together. They were first presented as All-American types, and then Tiger Beat types – check out Vince going for the tween audience on TNT 2/22/85. They lose the titles to the Dream Team on TNT 9/20/85, with Valiant rubbing a lit cigar in Windham’s eye, and ol’ Barry gets the injury hard sell complete with eyepatch. Windham left first in the fall of 1985, and Rotundo followed soon after.
Later in the year, Greg “The Hammer” Valentine and Brutus Beefcake form The Dream Team under “Luscious” Johnny Valiant’s guidance. They’re loosely teaming up on TNT 5/17/85, and more solidly a unit on TNT 8/23/85.
In 1984, several Stampede stars started filtering into the WWF, and by the end of the year Vince had cut a deal and outright bought Stampede Wrestling, which leads to The British Bulldogs and The Hart Foundation officially coming in as talents. They aren’t stars at first, but 1985 features the first glimpses of both teams and it starts to get exciting. It’s kind of incredible that 1985, when Macho Man and Ricky Steamboat were just getting their start, Bret Hart debuted in the territory.
Plus, THE KILLER BEES! And WHERE DID THE SAMOANS GO? They just disappeared!
The Managers
Wrestler contracts were still a thing played up, and the WWF played with them – for example, in the fall it is revealed that Jimmy Hart has traded King Kong Bundy to Bobby “The Brain” Heenan for the contracts of The Missing Link, Adrian Adonis, and a sizeable amount of cash. Macho Man Randy Savage’s big hook when he came in was all the heel managers after his services – only for him to reveal he’ll be managed by Miss Elizabeth. There is even a Manager of the Year vote, the results of which are revealed on TNT 9/27/85.
Bobby “The Brain” Heenan is THE manager in 1985 – everything he does worth watching, and he wasn’t quite all over WWF programming as he was in the late-80s and early 90s. This is a guy who’s singular focus is managing – specifically, managing and taking out first Andre the Giant and then probably Hulk Hogan. This is a man in his promo prime and all he does is gold – he’s funny, witty, swaggering, scary, a coward, aloof, and angry … whatever the situation calls for. And most importantly – he’s a BUSINESSMAN. It was a true marvel of a wrestling character.
Witness his post-Andre haircut interview on TNT 1/25/85, where he showed he could be serious and mean: his pre-Mania interview on the same TNT, where he is gloating and swaggering. His managerial work for Ken Patera on TNT 3/22/85, where he takes some classic bumps via Andre the Giant. His post-Orndorff firing interview on TNT 4/26/85, where he does an epic rant that gets legitimately scary. His interview on TNT 9/13/85, where a kid brings his pet weasel to the set! Him interacting with a bunch of geeks in the TNT audience on TNT 11/1/85, where he is just a master at work. He and Captain Lou COMMIT to the halloween hijinks on SNME 11/2/85 too.
Jimmy Hart quietly makes a name for himself too as he builds up his stable of goons. He first appears on TNT 3/22/85 as the manager of IC Champ Greg “The Hammer” Valentine, and he’s managing King Kong Bundy too. Jimmy sang, he talked shit, he wore obnoxious jackets, and he shouted things from his megaphone as he jumped around outside. It was kind of magic. Jimmy fashions himself a rock n’ roll man who can sing songs, though every one he sings on TV is lip sync’d. Jimmy was like any good manager – scrawny, annoying, obnoxious, and just a little bit scary. Witness him get REAL serious on TNT 11/15/85.
Hart’s stable of bad guys is a constant midcard presence too. At the start of the year he manages Greg “The Hammer” Valentine and King Kong Bundy, before Hammer moved on to team with Brutus Beefcake and Bundy went on to be led by Heenan. Hart brings in a young powerhouse Jim Neidhart at the start of the year, before also introducing Bret Hart and forming The Hart Foundation. As 1985 rounds out, Hart is managing Adrian Adonis and Terry Funk.
“Classy” Freddie Blassie is an old pro and him with Iron Sheik & Nikolai Volkoff is classic pro wrestling. I cannot over-state enough how much I love that this heel old man Blassie sided with Iran and Russia and is wearing neon color sequined jackets and pants, like he’s living in a very rich retirement community but plots against the U.S. on the weekends. Blassie is just a fun guy to watch – so old, such an old wrestling professional … a complete bastard who you know completely gets it, and has enough credibility that it’s OK if he corpses once in a while. All of Sheik and Volkoff’s big appearances have Blassie in them and it is very likely he is fantastic in them.
Evil-ass Mr. Fuji declares war on the WWF and gathers Magnificent Muraco, Moondog Spot, and Jim Neidhart for a second as they go after Ricky Steamboat and uh… well. That’s it. Then Fuji kind of got sidetracked by Hollywood. Muraco and Fuji are a fun midcard pair, Muraco as this mean beach bum with aspirations of Hollywood character and Fuji the shit-eating grin evil goon in a bell hat and tuxedo. The best thing that aired on WWF television in 1985 might be Mr. Fuji smiling along as Vince McMahon accuses him and Muraco of cheating on TNT 2/1/85.
“Luscious” Johnny Valiant takes on a big role as rival of Bruno Sammartino and manager of the Tag Team Champions but he is a total 80s heel that feels very lost to time, like he is a guy from 2018 doing a parody of an 80s wrestling manager. His feigning sincerity after putting a cigar in Barry Windham’s eye on TNT 9/20/85 is pretty good. But witness Vince McMahon be so annoyed with him on TNT 11/29/85.
Captain Lou Albano manages The U.S. Express and George “The Animal” Steele and maybe some other guys but he is less a manager and more a mascot. Albano was a key part of all the big Mania angles, playing his part as recognizable big fat guy from the wrestling. I’m not sure anything he does in 1985 is as good as his scumbag heel slob role in 1984, though the emotion he is able to ring out of the George “The Animal” Steele angle is adorable. Still though, guy is a pro, and Albano as a raving manic lunatic in sweatpants and dirty clothes and a t-shirt that reveals his big belly is so good. His impassioned plea to Hulk Hogan to avenge Cyndi Lauper on TNT 1/4/85 is incredible too. Instead of incredible rambling promos and being a coward, he offers incredible rambling promos where he is your lovable alcoholic uncle. He is wrapped into the fabric of the World Wrestling Federation.
The Other Wrestlers
Plus, Adrian Adonis finds his way back into the fold and continues to bump his head off, this time with a few more pounds. It is awesome.
Meanwhile, the jobber roster feels just as fleshed out as the attractions. “Iron” Mike Sharpe, Barry O and Rene Goulet all make vague names for themselves. Check out Sharpe being weird on TNT 11/22/85 and Barry O being cocky on TNT 10/18/85. Check out THE DUKE OF DORCHESTER on TNT 5/3/85 and SNME 5/11/85.
Mike Dee, Mario Mancini, Steve Lombardi, Charlie Fulton, and Terry Gibbs all just kind of show up and are perfect at being non-descript schlubs, and become a part of the recurring cast of characters on the WWF. A weird trend begins in 1985 where many enhancement matches shown on TNT are usually joined in progress to right where Gorilla says the jobber’s name, and then they don’t even air the finish. They didn’t have personalities but they all had names, darn it.
Also, Rusty Brooks could have been a star.
Outside the Ring
Dave Hebner also makes his debut as referee, a bit before his twin brother would do the same.
Rita Marie as A LADY REFEREE FOR THE FIRST TIME IN WWF HISTORY, and boy do they hard sell it. Witness it in all its’ glory on TNT 3/1/85.
Those That Made it Worth It: WWF in 1985
1. Macho Man Randy Savage
2. Ricky Steamboat
3. Terry Funk
4. Tito Santana
5. Hulk Hogan
6. Rowdy Roddy Piper
7. Paul Orndorff
8. Barry Windham
9. Dynamite Kid
10. Bruno Sammartino
Best Tag Team
- Barry Windham & Mike Rotundo
- The British Bulldogs
- The Hart Foundation
Best Manager
- Bobby Heenan
- Jimmy Hart
- “Classy” Freddie Blassie
Best Host/Voice
- Jesse Ventura
- Mean Gene Okerlund
- Vince McMahon
Quietly Impressive
- King Kong Bundy
- Leaping Lanny Poffo
- King Tonga
Hit-and-Miss
- Junkyard Dog
- Greg Valentine
- Magnificent Muraco
Good at Entertainment
- Andre the Giant
- Iron Sheik & Nikolai Volkoff
- Big John Studd
Best Jobbers
- “The Duke of Dorchester” Pete Doherty
- Iron Mike Sharpe
- Rusty Brooks
