The RAW brand right now reminds me of a stiff corporate institution, bogged down by a lack of long-term decision-making thanks to a need for an immediate increase to the bottom line. The show runs 3 hours which is far too long to make anything outside of a few big moments truly compelling, the staff seems bloated, and matches and moments are just being trotted out on TV to pop some short-term interest as opposed to tell a truly interesting long-term story that might actually make somebody a star.
Of course, if we’re talking the long game, and view WWE as this weird meta-thing that it has become, the story being told right now does have something to it. Kevin Owens winning the Universal Title with Triple H’s help might have seemed a bit cheap and lazy, but this is what happens – the boss picks his guy. In the weird meta-story that WWE typically tells, that’s how life is. Or at least that’s what WWE corporate thinks that’s what life is. Not that I want to see corporate jockeying as the main story of my wrestling, but it is what it is.
The SmackDown brand, on the other hand, reminds me of a start-up – it’s a little disorganized, there’s not a ton of stand-out stuff, but it’s new and there’s passion and the guys in charge are wearing blue jeans.
And then NXT and the Cruiserweight Classic are… I don’t know, some hot new online publication that’s ripe for acquisition that will take away anything that was interesting about it in the first place (Hello, September 19th!).
September, which is typically a pretty dire month for WWE, does have a lot of really interesting stuff going on: the brand split is still new and both brand’s are finding their footing, Kevin Owens is the new Universal Champ, AJ Styles is the new WWE Champ, Becky Lynch is SmackDown’s Women’s Champ, Bayley’s on RAW, Shinsuke Nakamura is the ace of NXT, and guys like The Miz, Heath Slater, and even apparently Jack Swagger are finally getting some well-deserved buzz.
Here’s the thing about WWE TV and wrestling – there really rarely is a BAD match. They’ve stinker-proofed the show. Pretty much everybody called up to TV is a professional. And yes there are a few questionable folks there, but there’s still merit in being able to handle yourself in front of a big WWE crowd on a live WWE TV show. Because of this talented roster, the PPV matches are usually damn good, peaking at fucking incredible. The TV matches, though, tend to be shorter, have more restrictions, and lack any real character.
This is exemplified in a match like Gallows & Anderson vs. New Day … yeah it was OK, but why did it happen and what was the point? If the idea was for Gallows & Anderson to be put over by beating the Tag Champs, they didn’t really hard sell that. If the idea is that Big E replacing Xavier will make New Day more competitive, they didn’t really hard sell that either. So, it was just a match. It did its’ thing. But if this is a story you’re supposed to be watching 52 weeks out of the year for several hours a week, as WWE would probably hope their fanbase does… it really just comes across as a way to kill time. There might be a lot of cool stuff going on, but it’s wrapped up in a pretty dumbass package.
RAW was a fine hour-and-a-half show stretched out to three ungodly hours. I don’t know what the answer is – I could probably watch this as the abbreviated Hulu show and enjoy it more, but then there isn’t fun in watching the show live, and I’d miss a sweet Bo Dallas squash or something. I know the direction is kind of fucked since they weren’t expecting the Finn Balor injury to be so bad, but still… c’mon guys. The women’s division had the entire first 40 minutes of the show and it was alright. The presentation of women in WWE right now is a billion times better than it has been, but they still opened the show with the same bickering bullshit that Rollins or Cena or Orton or whoever would always do. Either way – Sasha Banks’ jacket was exceptional. The Women’s Title #1 Contender’s 3-way was a fine match… Bayley continues to look great, while Sasha and Dana aren’t setting the world on fire right now but didn’t look terrible either. The headscissors sending Bayley into the corner for the Sasha double kneedrop in the corner was pretty sweet. Bo Dallas seems to have a new lease on life – hope it lasts. His squash matches the last 2 weeks have been perfect as far as getting across his new attitude and making him look like an aggressive killer after a couple years of being a joke. Sometimes it’s just that simple.
Part of me feels like this Chris Jericho vs. Sami Zayn feud is, oddly enough, going to be better for promos than the in-ring stuff. They had some pretty bad matches earlier in the year. I still think Zayn should be on SmackDown, as there really isn’t a young midcard guy to root for on that show outside of Crews, who’s flailing. But the promo was a good segment, and there’s at least a logical reason for them to be feuding. Thought Jericho laying on the mat to introduce the “lowest of the low” Sami Zayn was pretty brilliant. Sheamus and Cesaro had another good match… wish they’d say what title opportunity this thing is for. Can’t complain about two dudes beating the fudge out of each other on my high definition television though. Cesaro sold the back like a champ and the crowd was with them the whole time. The Enzo/Epico and Nia Jax/Alicia segments were what they were… nothing very interesting, but got who they needed to a bit more over.
Completely astounded that World Wrestling Entertainment booked and promoted a match as a “SummerSlam Rematch” on TV in order to promote the exact same match at Night of Champions. I know Big E is the difference maker, but I don’t think that was said at all. What a confusing company. New Day vs. Gallows & Anderson was a fine TV match, just not very compelling and a little heatless. It closed strong, and I liked Xavier getting a chance to go all Strong Style trading strikes with Anderson. A guy demanding peace who cheats is a decent gimmick idea, but I don’t think Jinder Mahal combined with WWE production is going to make it work. Kevin Owens vs. Roman Reigns was a good, serviceable main event – not blowaway great, but two guys putting on a really solid match. The work after the restart was damn good. Roman doing the deadlift spot on Owens was crazy. Reigns is actually starting to remind me a lot of The Undertaker… over-pushed early and put in a lot of weird situations, but has the presence of a top guy, is reliable in the spot, and obviously looks and kind of works like him – big, expressive, aggressive guy who randomly dives over the top rope. Foley’s rant on Rollins was pretty awesome, but wish he pulled that out in a more interesting angle. Tremendous beatdown from Rusev to end the show… really hope they can get back on track with this Roman/Rusev feud, as Rusev deserves it and the work is usually great.
SmackDown has all kinds of interesting stuff going on right now, and with another star or two this becomes a heck of a lineup – AJ Style as the champ, Hollywood Miz as IC champ, John Cena and Dean Ambrose feuding (but not full-on feuding), Becky Lynch as Women’s Champ, Nikki Bella putting over everybody during what I’d imagine is her last run, The Usos as heels, American Alpha yet to return, Baron Corbin being a dick, Jack Swagger as a fired up new signee, and of course Heath Slater and Rhyno. Cena and Dean trading shots in the opening segment was a super compelling exchange, and the Cena/Dean/AJ match could be really great, and how you fill-up time in an interesting way. No big match is being given away, Cena’s going after a record-tying WWE World Title reign, Dean’s adding a few more layers to his character, and AJ gets to be a dipshit who has great matches. The Usos – IN WHITE PANTS!! – vs. The Hype Bros was a short match, but got more accomplished than a lot of the matches on RAW – Usos doing more heel stuff, Mojo getting a nice tackle in, and Usos going over. I’m not sure what the Curt Hawkins vignette was but it was the most interesting thing he’s done outside of the original Edgehead run-in – but, also, wasn’t he supposed to debut this week?
The Miz/Ziggler/Bryan exchange was top shelf stuff. Normally it’d be worth a groan for WWE TV to have a talking segment, then quick match, then another talking segment… but Miz is just too great of an act right now. And the HEAT Maryse is getting!! The Corbin/Crews segment did what it had to, followed by an iffy promo by new SmackDown signee Jack Swagger in front of a very confused crowd. I liked the Fatal 5-Way Women’s match… felt like the last half of the title match from Backlash, a little less crazy but also a little less clunky. As far as Heath Slater goes, I still can’t believe that they ran one of their goofy redemption stories where a guy actually got redemption and actually got more over. It feels like they have to do redemption angles like once a month because they aren’t very good at getting guys over, and then the angle usually goes nowhere anyways. But they’ve really got something with Heath right now. The SmackDown roster doesn’t have huge depth, so they’re forced to make everyone seem important. The Ascension interrupting the Heath celebration might seem weird, but it weirdly worked, even if the match wasn’t much. WWE taking Orton vs. Wyatt slower isn’t a bad idea, but the way they handled it at Backlash was just such shit. Decent exchange, and was genuinely surprised at Erick Rowan getting involved. James Ellsworth with the CAW “excited guy” entrance was great. Tag was a fine TV main event that had some good action, got cut up by commercial, and told the story it needed to tell. Not buying that Dean hitting Cena with Dirty Deeds was a heel turn – but it was a very cool way to close the show.
And finally, a couple questions: Is there an ad on WWE TV insinuating fucking food? And WHERE IS KALISTO!?!?!?
Talking Smack again brings the Daniel Bryan-focused greatness: Mocking the amount of talking on SmackDown vs. wrestling, saying he got censored last week for saying “balls” when Cena and Orton can say it – then proceeding to say “balls” like 10 times in a row, admitting WWE can’t afford to license MLB footage, and bantering with Alexa Bliss. Baron Corbin was also tremendous in his interview – Big Banter is REAL. Bryan and Renee at one point questioned whether Heath actually signed his SmackDown contract and played it up like it was a new direction… but he did sign the contract. And Shane McMahon continues to appear like he does not give a fuck.
NXT had a show this week. It was fine. The Samoa Joe promo to open the show got me thinking… one of my favorite things about WCW TV studio wrestling was that because it’s such a small crowd in a more enclosed space, when a guy cuts a promo you can audibly hear the crowd yell out stuff. We can look back now and have a chuckle over folk in mid-80s Atlanta hollering stuff like “you fight like a girl!” – it’s the same thing at Full Sail. Occasionally the crowd will get annoying, but it has its’ own reliable atmosphere and the crowd mostly buys into everything. And in 30 years we’ll probably be able to laugh at it too. Samoa Joe and Shinsuke Nakamura had a solid angle where Joe faked an apology for being a dick, and then attacked Nakamura leading to a stretcher job. Best part of this thing was Nakamura hurting his hand by punching Joe’s head. I liked this segment, but I’m scared if they are running this feud all the way to November. I appreciate that NXT can stretch stuff out, but hope they are able to add in a couple more buzz-worthy aspects to the show because there’s only so many ways you can kill time between Joe and Nakamura.
Liv Morgan has good instincts as far as reacting to a crowd, but not a lot else yet. Rachel Ellering now goes by Rachel Fazio, I imagine due to her dad being a creep managing the Authors of Pain. Morgan vs. Fazio wasn’t very good. Hideo Itami vs. Drew Gulak was a fun little match … pretty short, but great intensity and some nasty strikes. Nice pick-up by Graves on commentary when Gulak held Itami’s surgically repaired shoulder down for the pin. Authors of Pain squash got its’ point across and had a nasty assisted powerbomb. Bobby Roode vs. No Way Jose was a really solid studio TV main event, backrake included. I liked Bobby grabbing Jose’s hair and beard for control, and he did a fine job as a heel controlling the match even if the crowd was all about him. Corey Graves had some great lines here too… “Have you ever had sashimi at 30,000 feet?” and “I’m gonna get endorsements for my vocal cords, Phillips” were highlights.
I won’t be covering the CWC Finals here, as I have a Quick Thoughts up on it. I did though catch the two bonus Cruiserweight Classic matches.. they’re not TV matches as they’re exclusive to YouTube, but where else can I talk about how fucking awesome Cedric Alexander is right now? Cedric vs. Oney Lorcan was really good… Cedric is just on fire right now showing off his stuff to the WWE Universe, and like I said in Quick Thoughts reminds me of AJ Styles in just how good and impactful everything he does looks. Liked the chop block/roundhouse kick duck exchange, and the nasty hangman’s neckbreaker. All of Oney’s stuff looks gritty and stiff as fuck, and then he does some wild exchange and you’re like damn this guy can wrestle too. The Euro uppercut to counter the springboard move and then the forearm counter to the handspring elbow attempt…damn. Also want to shout-out Cedric Alexander for waving his finger after his counter of the half-nelson suplex off the top looked like it hurt him anyway, re-assuring the crowd that he was OK and getting them to cheer leading into the finish – amazing. Cedric’s elbows. Biff’s uppercuts. Jesus fuck. They worked a damn fine WWE TV match here, complete with a couple chinlocks. Tony Nese/Drew Gulak vs. Lince Dorado/Kenneth Johnson was a fun little match too. The Nese/Johnson bicep-off was a hoot. And oh MAN did Drew Gulak look good taking Lince’s stuff. Lince cannot be a human being; everything he does is just too pretty. There were a couple iffy spots and it was too short to really reach another level, but I still had a good time.
Main Event was alright. Breezango opened the show in pirate shirts and now have pet names for each other – Dango and Breezy. Kane squashed Dango, but not after Breezy offered to get his measurements for his own pirate shirt. It was FUN. It was ENTERTAINING. Aiden English vs. Jason Jordan with Chad Gable also happened and was a solid match, as Jordan sold well and got to hit a suplex or two, and English is a really fine singles guy, doing really obnoxious poses and bumping big. I’m probably a bit too bothered by Chad Gable showing up after his injury on Main Event, and not bothered enough that in between the matches on SmackDown’s C-Show it’s all RAW RECAPS. Superstars had the longest and by proxy best Braun Strowman match, again against Sin Cara. Cara’s real solid and they did some fun cut-offs, including Braun catching Cara off a springboard backflip. This was a Superstars Match Worth Watching. Darren Young and Neville vs. Titus O’Neil and Curtis Axel happened. It was OK. Basic WWE tag match with Neville taking the heat and some extra Neville-y bumps. Fun hot tag and finish, and Bob Backlund lifting up Neville was tremendous. I hope the cruiserweight division re-invigorates my boy Neville, because right now he screams guy who will be working Battle of Los Angeles in a year or two.
WWE TV Match of the Week: Cesaro vs. Sheamus in Match #5 of the Best of 7 Series… with the CWC no more, it’s back to WWE TV matches. And these guys deserve a lot of credit… they’re just having a bunch of great matches for no real reason. Owens vs. Reigns was a close second, but it only got really good after the restart.
WWE TV MVP of the Week: AJ Styles … a great promo to open SmackDown, part of an interesting angle with Dean and Cena, fun backstage segments trying to find a tag team partner, and a good TV main event. That is what it looks like when you are the Champ That Runs the Camp – AJ Styles is carrying the show.
