TOKYO JOSHI~! JUDGEMENT 2022~! MIYAHARA AND BIG SHUJ KILLING EACH OTHER~! WHIPASS~!
Maki Ito © vs. Yuki Arai – International Princess Title (TJPW Grand Princess 3/19)
Tokyo Joshi pulled all the stops for this Sumo Hall show. From the bombastic entrances to NJPW legend Hidekazu Tanaka handling ring announcing duties – it feels big. Although a bit light at times, Maki and Arai had themselves a Ryogoku-worthy title match. They worked with an effective Big Match layout and set up some clear themes that got over well. Ito was surprisingly competent in the grumpy veteran role, working the lower back and mugging for the camera like a pro. Lots of heart from both – Arai’s underdog determination coming through in those last few forearm battles. ***1/4
Yuka Sakazaki & Mizuki © vs. Rika Tatsumi & Miu Watanabe – Princess Tag Team Titles (TJPW Grand Princess 3/19)
The kind of match that might convert unsuspecting Puro Twitter weebs into die-hard TJPW stans. All action all the time – the four gals bringing high-level execution and major league urgency to Sumo Hall. Watanabe stole the show with her ridiculous feats of strength and came off as a can’t-miss future PRINCESS OF PRINCESS. That’s right, I know all the Tokyo Joshi lingo.
They kept a wild pace from bell to bell, both teams repeatedly outdoing each other with creative and energetic team work. As the Internet’s foremost appreciator of Leg-Based Psychology, I loved the Tanahashi-esque dragon screw onslaught from Rika. A whole lot of fun. ***3/4
Miyu Yamashita © vs. Shoko Nakajima – Princess of Princess Title (TJPW Grand Princess 3/19)
Total homerun of a main event. If this hit all the right notes for yours truly, the ultimate Tokyo Joshi neophyte, I can only imagine what it felt like for long-term fans. While the tear-soaked video package got the history across pretty well, the match itself managed to convey every piece of Important Information. Miyu: badass champion/ace figure – will kick your head off. Shoko: high-flying babyface challenger – loves the animal kingdom.
Let’s talk LAYOUT (*cough*). They structured everything around that supremely well-timed dive cutoff where Nakajima got her head ripped off. Working off a clear power dynamic, Yamashita (Kicky Aggressor) and Nakajima (Flippy Underdog) both fell in natural roles and the action grew organically from there.
Love character-based wrestling as much as the next guy, but it wouldn’t be a 2022 Sumo Hall main event without a few GIF-able Epic Moments. Thankfully, the big match thrills came flying left and right during the ending stretch – what with the European clutch-into-deadlift-German suplex sequence and assorted Skull Kickery from Miyu. I was also somewhat blown away by the decisive finish and lack of 25 mandatory kickouts. Very cool. I’ll be back, TJPW. ****
Saki Akai vs. Maya Yukihi (DDT Judgement 3/20)
The chemistry between these two was a bit on and off throughout the lead-up tags, but they managed to stick the landing. They resolved Maya’s DDT introduction storyline with a hard-fought match – local girl Saki having to prove her worth against a ‘’real’’ Joshi wrestler.
Both wore their emotions on their sleeve and it gave the match plenty of dramatic moments. What Akai sometimes lack in ring polish, she makes up for in facial expressions. It’s impossible not to root for this girl. The looks she fired off during the big slap-off climax brought this thing to another level. ***1/2
Jun Akiyama & Takao Omori vs. Kazusada Higuchi & Hideki Okatani (DDT Judgement 3/20)
Healthy bowl of meat and potatoes to celebrate Uncle Jun’s 30 years in wrasslin’. New Eruption member Okatani was more than game to step up as whipping boy in peril, eating a king-sized beating from the reunited AJPW Class of 1992. To no one’s surprise, Big Gooch fit with the All Japan dads like a glove and made old man Omori look about 10 years younger. ***1/4
Daisuke Sasaki © vs. Jun Kasai vs. MAO – DDT Universal Title 3-Way Match (DDT Judgement 3/20)
Three car crash enthusiasts putting the hurt on each other and ticking off the Hardcore Match checkbox from the DDT Big Show Checklist. Sasaki’s Universal reign has been pretty cold, especially after Yuki Ueno’s beloved run, but he can still get the job done in these prop-heavy settings.
The blood-soaked half-zombie face paint was a hell of a visual in a match featuring a whole lot of ‘em. MAO’s always beneficial to this type of match, as his weirdo brain and wacky acrobatics add unpredictability to otherwise-tired tropes. Very much looking forward to see what he does as champion. ***1/2
HARASHIMA & Naomi Yoshimura © vs. Chris Brookes & Masahiro Takanashi – KO-D Tag Team Titles (DDT Judgement 3/20)
CDK truly is the best possible use of Takanashi right now. The guy does nothing for me in singles matches, but his weird Toru Yano meets Johnny Saint bullshit somehow clicks in tag format. Likely because he can focus on the twists and turns while Brookes handles the workrate.
This wasn’t too far from the banger against ShunMAO at Korakuen – CDK bringing the high-level tag team orchestration and 2002 ROH multiman submission spots. God bless. Yoshimura and Brookes showed some firey chemistry for the finish, young Christopher going back to the unexpected physicality that made him a D-Oh 2021 standout and unleashing the true power of BRITISH STRONG STYLE. ***1/2
Konosuke Takeshita © vs. Tetsuya Endo – KO-D Openweight Title (DDT Judgment 3/20)
I’ve been extremely invested in Takeshita’s current KO-D run. The Akiyama influence and gradual shift towards a beefier, more traditional style has been fascinating to watch. He played Jumbo Tsuruta On Crack against Yuki Ueno and had straight-up meat-eating contests with Big Japan’s Yuji Okabayashi. It’s been a hell of a ride and unfortunately, it’s time to get off.
Weirdly enough, they wrapped up this reign with a match that didn’t exactly fit with Super Ace Takeshita 2.0’s new approach. Gone were most of the size advantage logistics of his recent matches. Gone was the air of quasi-invincibility. They went for a different kind of epic, not only playing off the previous Take/Endo encounters but also paying tribute to the entire history of DDT itself.
It’s not the match I had envisioned, but it’s something that made sense in the context of a 25th anniversary Sumo Hall main event. Match length perverts be damned, Take and Endo really did pack a lot of shit in the 46-minute run time. We’re talking high-tech Sasuke Special counters, apron Canadian Destroyers, Brainbusters to the floor and assorted nods to Antonio Honda and Poison Sawada JULIE. A ton of shit.
Obviously, I loved the idea of Endo using Akiyama’s Exploders to turn the tide near the end. Even if they looked a bit lame. Everything else looked flawless and ultimately, that will be the big selling point of this match. Just plain spectacular execution considering the length and complexity of it all.
As good this was, I still walked away from it realizing my interest in the Take/Endo story had now taken a backseat to the new scenarios Takeshita started exploring in the last two years. That’s on me though and not really a fault with the work in this match, which was pretty great. ****
Shotaro Ashino vs. Ryuki Honda – Last Man Standing (AJPW Champions Night III 3/21)
The rawest match of the entire weekend and one of Honda’s best showcases yet. Even during his shockingly-good match with Kento back in January, Honda still came off like an awkward kid playing villain. The evil smile during his entrance here and subsequent FAILED STABBING ATTEMPT (!?) told a different story.
These slug-fests with Ashino are helping him turn into a fully-fleshed sociopath. Dudes rock. Both guys brought buckets of hate to the table and Ashino pulled off one of the best finishes of the year with that SUPLEX CITY-style murder. At this rate, All Japan will have a new top heel by the end of the year. ***1/2
Hikaru Sato © vs. Hokuto Omori – AJPW Jr. Heavyweight Title (AJPW Champions Night III 3/21)
Speaking of Zen Nihon youngsters coming into their own, this was easily the best match of Hokuto’s career. He and Hikaru already a pretty decent slobberknocker during the dreaded empty arena period of 2021, but this reached another level. Heelish confidence, chef’s kisses and major league timing – Omori put it all together here and came off as a future player.
Hopefully, that gorgeous Dragon suplex will become a staple of his big matches, because it works better than all of his other current finishers. Props to Sato for being right there with the kid every step of the way. It’s literally impossible to have a bad match with this man and I’m glad he gets to show off for one more reign. ***3/4
Kento Miyahara © vs. Shuji Ishikawa – Triple Crown (AJPW Champions Night III 3/21)
The cursed COVID era gave us the definitive Kento/Zeus match in 2020 and now it has blessed us with a top-tier Kento/Big Shuj burner. My god, this thing kicked all kinds of ass. Ishikawa woke up with the burning desire to torture Miyahara in brand new ways and it led to his best All Japan performance in ages. Case in point: the pure delight on this man’s face after he nuked the champ with a Kaiju-sized baseball slide dropkick.
Miyahara rose up to the challenge of a motivated Ishikawa and put in the work. For all the complaining about his 5 Moves of Doom, the man’s genius resides in between those five moves. He’s always selling, screaming or pulling in the crowd with his facials. And for all of his cockiness, he’s not afraid to look weak – which adds danger those perennial match-closing forearm duels.
Like the aforementioned Kento/Zeus 2020 and some of those Jake Lee epics from last year, this was the Miyahara Template Main Event jacked up to 11. Which means they got to explore an entire new layer of reality – this weird, unpredictable dimension that exists only after someone kicks out of the Shutdown German. Shit was wild: new death moves from Big Shuj, 1 count kickouts and an absolute ALL TIMER of a Frankensteiner from the champ.
All Japan have needed a match like this for a while. After the Jake Lee injury and a promising chunk of the roster bailing on TAJIRI, things were looking pretty bleak. But with Kento back in MOTYC-delivering mode, young guys gunning for bigger spots and a hugely-promising Champ Carnival just around the corner, it might be time to dive back into AJPW TV. ****1/4
