H.Y.O. vs. Kento Kobune
The 5 minute time limit for opening matches is something that could benefit a whole lot of promotions out there. And by ‘’a whole lot’’, I strictly mean Pro Wrestling NOAH. Kobune got his ass kicked for half of the match but came back strongly with one of the swiftest flying forearms I’ve ever seen and some nifty armbar takedowns. Nice to see the youngster get a spot on a PPV-level card. **1/4
Kaito Ishida © vs. Yosuke Santa Maria – Open The Brave Gate
Dragon Gate’s biggest strength throughout this god forsaken pandemic has been their use of wildly-vocal ring-side seconds to make up for the muted crowd reactions. Case in point: this match right here. Dragon Dia pounding the mat like a maniac gave Maria’s comebacks such crazy energy. The stacked deck layout also helped turn her into the ultimate babyface, as she had to fend off not only Ishida’s needling leg attacks but also various R.E.D. interference spots. Ishida played off this scenario quite nicely by behaving like an evil little prick. Sure, his leg work added some depth to the action, but him ripping off of Maria’s skirt was the real Holy Shit moment here. What a scumbag. Best of all, the bells and whistles coalesced into an action-packed ending stretch with all the juicy 2.999 near-falls that YOU crave. Fun for the whole family. ***1/2
Yasushi Kanda, Kagetora, Gamma & Ho Ho Lun vs. Keisuke Okuda, Mondai Ryu, Punch Tominaga & U-T
Considering Ho Ho Lun, Mondai Ryu and Gamma were all on deck here, this was better than it had any right to be. 8 minutes of blistering action intricately weaved together with the usual Dragon Gate precision. Tominaga timed his Matrix dodge perfectly to cap off the babyface in peril segment, Kagetora popped me on how about 4 different occasions with his clever spots and Okuda played the grumpy card just enough to keep the R.E.D. conspiracy theories alive and well. No complaints. ***
Don Fujii, Genki Horiguchi & Ryo Saito vs. Ultimo Dragon, Shuji Kondo & Masaaki Mochizuki
The old men of Dragon Gate sacrificing life and limb in the name of comedy. You love to see it. All of these guys have earned the right to fuck around on the undercard for the rest of their lives and I’ll never hold their shtick-heavy matches against them. Especially when the aforementioned shtick brings this many laughs. The last 2 minutes here were legitimately compelling, but nothing came close to giving me as much joy as the failed Stalker Ichikawa interference sequence and Genki’s mortified face when Mochi tried to literally gouge off his forehead. **1/2
Naruki Doi vs. Kzy
Please give me a minute to pick my jaw from the off floor. What the fuuu—fjdsfhsd?! I will start this professional wrestling review by stating that you won’t find a more action-packed 11 minute match anywhere in the COVID era. 420 legend Kzy laid claim to Doi’s Mr. Ota-ku title in the most logical way possible: having a belter in the Ota City General Gymnasium. Both guys were ON here: rushing each other at the bell and never letting up for the short duration. Kzy bumped like an absolute lunatic to make every single piece of Doi offense look like a potential match ender (holy shit @ the Doi Fives off the apron to the floor) and then gave it right back with impossibly-clever European uppercut variations and flash rollups. In true Dragon Gate fashion, the timing and speed at which all of this was executed has to be seen to be believed. Counters upon counters leading to an unexpected submission finish that fit the urgent tone of the match like a glove. WILD! ****
Ben-K, Strong Machine J & Dragon Dia © vs. Takashi Yoshida, Diamante & KAZMA SAKAMOTO – Open The Triangle Gate
Here’s another match that completely shattered my expectations. A crazy ride of a 6-man tag surprisingly worthy of the Triangle Gate legacy considering the mixed bag feel of the lineup. Everyone put in a serious shift but the undeniable MVP of the match was Ben-K. This man has gone from Daisuke Sekimoto-sized kaiju monster back to Classic Ben-K in the space of a few months and he made incredible use of his newly regained speed in this one. Completely lost my shit for his fearless spear through the ropes and had a similar reaction for him taking the MOTHER OF ALL CORNER-POST BUMPS. Don’t even get me started on the way he charged face first into a KAZMA knee strike to the face like freakin’ Shinsuke Nakamura working Kazushi Sakuraba at the Dome. Add to this the multitude of endlessly-rewindable Dragon Dia lucha armdrag and headscissors spots and you have yourself the most GIF-able match of the entire show so far. ***3/4
Kota Minoura & Jason Lee © vs. Dragon Kid & Susumu Yokosuka – Open The Twin Gate
The Minoura/Jason tag title win against R.E.D. hinted at great things from the young duo and this match more than delivered on that promise. They’ve already figured out optimal roles for each other within the structure of a tag team wrasslin’ odyssey. Minoura eats the veteran beating and stokes the flames of attrition with angry fighting spirit faces while Jason saves the day and procures the crowd-popping hot tag offense. The old men of Team Toryumon not only fit perfectly within this given structure, they also pushed the lads to up their game and gave us a proper Dragon Gate banger. Susumu brought the lariat-heavy veteran presence and made the youngsters work for everything, while Dragon Kid challenged Jason to an all-out aerial showdown that peaked with a mind-melting, Chaparrita-ASARI-worthy Sky Twister Press. One hell of a good time. ***3/4
Eita vs. YAMATO vs. Masato Yoshino vs. BxB Hulk vs. Big R Shimizu vs. KAI – 6-Way Steel Cage Match
As a straight-up wrestling match, this wasn’t the best. But evaluating this thing as a pure wrestling match would be very wrong. This was both high end sports entertainment and a tremendously effective vehicle for storyline progression. The concept alone is worthy of the most viral of all viral Japanese gameshows. Swarms of ring-side seconds climbing the cage to prevent wrestlers from escaping by using everything from airhorns to telescopic boxing gloves is just certified comedy gold. Then you add the absurdly high-stake stipulations + the legit shocking twists (WHY KAI WHY!?!?) and you have yourself a proper landscape-changing pro-wrestling EVENT. My favorite part of the match was Yoshino assaulting Shimizu with perfectly pitched baseballs, but it doesn’t matter because the real best part of the match was the aftermath. The closing angle between Shimizu and Eita brought the emotion and delivered the kind of soap opera gut punch finale that put this entire show over the top. Dragon Gate is in a great place right now. ***1/4
