1. Yuji Nagata, Satoshi Kojima & Ryusuke Taguchi vs. Togi Makabe, Tomoaki Honma & Gabriel Kidd
The most basic of openers, a charming bunch of wrestling from young Gabriel Kidd and all these lifers. There’s something about not having TJP and Chase Owens in these undercard matches that makes them a lot better. **
2. Tomohiro Ishii, Toru Yano & Yota Tsuji vs. SANADA, Hiromu Takahashi & BUSHI
These guys cut a faster pace than usual, with Yano hijinks and Tsuji almost upsetting Hiromu in between. Fun match. **3/4
3. Hiroyoshi Tenzan, Master Wato & Yuya Uemura vs. Yoshinobu Kanemaru, El Desperado & DOUKI
I don’t know how this dirt worst heel team beat this wonderfully random trio of babyfaces, but in COVID New Japan I guess we’re pushing EVERYBODY. The young boys showed up tonight too, as Uemura got a REAL close near fall on Desperado. Wato meanwhile looks slightly better each time I see him – I still can’t tell if it works, but I’m not convinced it won’t. They just need to find a balance between the gimmick and the fact that I’m pretty sure he can really go. There was a moment after he hit a corkscrew plancha that I thought, yeah: I could do Hiromu vs. Wato. Just hope Hiromu won’t be so cruel to Mister Wato. *3/4
4. Kazuchika Okada & Hirooki Goto vs. Yujiro Takahashi & Taiji Ishimori
Coming off the interference from last night and the fact that he’s de facto second-in-command Bullet Club heavyweight, the Yujiro push has arrived. There’s history with Naito, so I’m kind of into it even if he hasn’t shown up to work in like a decade. Here he really did look perfectly capable and fine, though the upcoming singles match with Okada (COVID New Japan moves fast) will be the real test of that. Otherwise, this was a match where Okada worked out of a series of cravates from Ishimori. Yujiro pins Goto, straight-up. **
5. NEVER Openweight Title: Shingo Takagi [c] vs. SHO
These two are doing the best wrestling going and had a great match here, one that didn’t freak me out as much as the first but was still high-end stuff. The first one a couple weeks ago was so impressive in that they had an epic match in front of no crowd – here, they had an epic match in front of a crowd with a few less surprises than the first. They cut the bullshit and ran at each other right away, never a lull because they were always smacking flash. Shingo controlled most of it while SHO kept fighting back until he couldn’t, the obvious play to make.
Shingo Takagi continues to be able to find fun dynamics opposite anybody in New Japan, but SHO was the difference maker here as whether he was simply walking down the entrance ramp or trying to muster up strength to fight back he sold this like it was the biggest match of his life. A lot of people have taken a lariat from Shingo, but not many made me think of the word “roadkill” when they did it. High energy, high impact, awesome pro wrestling. ****
El Desperado attacked Shingo Takagi – we’re going there.
6. IWGP Tag Team Title: Hiroshi Tanahashi & Kota Ibushi [c] vs. Taichi & Zack Sabre Jr.
Socially Distanced Babyface Hiroshi Tanahashi is something else, coming close to the fans then making sure that them and YOU – the viewer – understand the importance of not coming too close. The match was the tale of two vibes, one that was 20 minutes of Taichi and Zack working over Tanahashi’s leg for the hundredth time this year before they brought it home with 10 minutes of a phenomenal finish with action all over the place and straight-up LEG TORTURE delivered by Taichi and Zack en route to them actually winning. A heck of a finish, though the journey wasn’t my favorite. ***1/4
7. IWGP Heavyweight Title & IWGP Intercontinental Title: Tetsuya Naito [c] vs. EVIL
Scumbag EVIL with his straightened out hair and Perry Saturn-in-a-dress wrestling gear is a LOOK, and now I’m mad I had to sit through Switchblade and KENTA figuring themselves out – EVIL was a ready-made boring heel main eventer all along. If I’m sitting through main events I’m tempted to skim, I’d much rather they be with EVIL than those two.
There’s logic in these matches going so long, allegedly at least, but I will still bitch and moan about not enjoying it while I’m taking them in. This one was nearly 40-minutes and made it so we had back-to-back EVIL main events that didn’t deliver, back-to-back main events with Okada and Naito no less. EVIL is a raw heavyweight talent who can be hit-or-miss, with his best stuff in tags or with guys like Okada or Tanahashi. Naito isn’t the guy to take him anywhere special, or at least isn’t anymore – LIJ are usually the cool kids but now they’re in the main event and this read like the class clowns getting called up to teach the class and having no more jokes.
This could’ve and should’ve delivered, but it didn’t. It was a lot like the New Japan Cup Final, with even weaker and more meandering wrestling but an even wilder angle at the end that made up for it with Dick Togo revealing himself as EVIL’s new comrade in the Bullet Club. EVIL breaking Milano Collection AT’s heart was also among the greatest things I’ve ever seen in professional wrestling. I loved both of those last things, I loved Hiromu being the only guy fully loyal to Naito, but man did this match suck. *3/4
Happy Thoughts: Good show, with a more quality than usual undercard and a very interesting last few matches. Two weak New Japan main events in a row is still the most I’ve been INTO New Japan in a little bit. 7/10
