Some things went too long, the middle of the show felt pretty dead, but this was the most fun I’ve had watching pandemic wrestling since The Undertaker and AJ Styles threw punches at each other in a cemetery. Stadium Stampede delivered, but other things did too.
0. AEW World Tag Team Title #1 Contender Match: The Best Friends vs. Private Party
Poor Private Party looked a little rusty and as per usual it was a little much (15 minutes!) but this was some entertainment. At one point Chuck Taylor did a piledriver on the floor then followed it up with a superkick. It’s possible either Best Friends’ gimmick is legitimately doing too much stuff, or the directive for the Kickoff Match is to just do a bunch of your best stuff and hope it pieces together – I both respect and resent either one. **3/4
1. Casino Ladder Match for an AEW World Title Shot: Scorpio Sky vs. Frankie Kazarian vs. Darby Allin vs. Luchasaurus vs. Orange Cassidy vs. Colt Cabana vs. Joey Janela vs. Kip Sabian w/ Penelope Ford vs. Brian Cage w/ Tazz
As a first time gimmick match, I thought this worked. It’s a 9-Man Royal Rumble Ladder Match, which gave the overdone ladder insanity more structure than usual though it also led to the trope of guys disappearing for long periods of time. Outside of Darby Allin being a beautiful nutjob, there weren’t all that many big ladder spots. A ladder jamming Colt Cabana’s fingers may’ve been one of the more notable bumps, outside of Darby leaping from a ladder so high it gave Jim Ross TLC flashbacks and Brian Cage press slamming a ladder with Darby on top of it and tossing it outside of the ring.
The highlights here were the CHARACTERS, and at this point that’s all I want from a crazy Ladder Match. SoCal Uncensored squared off and ran the ropes, Orange Cassidy popped anybody with a pulse, and Darby Allin looked credible against Luchasaurus as he threw headbutts with a reckless abandon. Brian Cage managed by Tazz ended up the mystery final entrant and if you’re going to introduce a new wrestler, having him rip a ladder in half then throw Darby Allin around then win a shot at the World Title then stand around looking menacing as Tazz promises that he’s going to keep dropping bodies – YEAH, that’s how you introduce a new wrestler. ***1/4
2. Jungle Boy vs. MJF w/ Wardlow
This was a good match with clearly defined roles and a lot of impressive wrestling, though like a lot of AEW PPV matches they probably could’ve gotten more to the point. Did I really need to scream when it looked like MJF broke his skull off a reverse hurricanrana on the apron? I don’t think so. Regardless, I’ll say what anyone will tell you: Jungle Boy and MJF are two of the most exciting young wrestlers on the planet. This match continued to prove that – both aren’t all there, but watching someone put the tools together can sometimes be more fun. ***
3. AEW TNT Title Tournament – Final: Cody w/ Brandi Rhodes and Arn Anderson vs. Lance Archer w/ Jake Roberts
I am confounded by Cody Rhodes – interesting guy, amazing wrestling vision, and I generally enjoy what he TRIES to do – but this is the second Cody on PPV match that read more like an attempt to out-Triple H Triple H… longer than it has to be, lots of tricks, and an undeniable decent amount of drama in the last few minutes that still doesn’t fix all the boring we just sat through.
Cody getting tossed over the post to the floor was a quality bump. Arn Anderson getting something to do was fun. Mike Tyson was there! He got caught on camera yawning for a second, but otherwise added whatever he was there to add. But this sucker went 22 minutes and it felt like Cody was more focused on looking credible opposite Archer by breaking down his arm than just selling and making a comeback. I hope Lance Archer hit that crappy spinebuster on purpose too. **1/2
4. Kris Statlander vs. Penelope Ford w/ Kip Sabian
Kris Statlander got to the point as a babyface more than Cody, but this just read so hard like a come down match – 5 minutes of moves. *1/2
5. Dustin Rhodes vs. Shawn Spears
Shawn Spears’ smile when he revealed that Dustin Rhodes wasn’t there (OR SO HE THOUGHT!) was the best thing he’s done since he was getting guys over on NXT, but otherwise this did not work – as a quick brawl, as a babyface revenge thing, as a setup, as a comic farce with Spears getting stripped down and revealing he wears underwear with Tully Blanchard’s face on the dick… nothing hit. DUD
6. No DQ & No Countout Match – AEW Women’s World Title: Nyla Rose [c] vs. Hikaru Shida
Nyla Rose isn’t taking us to epic territory but she provided a platform for Hikaru Shida to just will this into being an awesome match – best in-ring one of the show by a lot. Rose controlled for a little while, then they took to the crowd and got crazy. Her running knee strikes, whether peppered in during a comeback or thrown to finish Nyla off, all hit big and they embraced the wild props around them with some nasty bumps off of oversized poker chips. Shida’s kendo stick shots were all awesome too – I cannot imagine Nyla felt very well afterwards. Once Shida started to turn the tide, they got some great near falls off an avalanche Falcon Arrow and a running knee – I know that not because a crowd bought in, but because I myself sat here downright astonished. ***1/2
7. AEW World Title: Jon Moxley [c] vs. Brodie Lee
This was sometimes pretty cool but give me some MEAT, boys! C’mon! I know you’re better than this! There were a lot of great violent bits, things that were intense or looked like they hurt, but I came away just thinking there was too much meandering. The brawling on the floor felt more WWE time-killing then anything actually awesome.
When they did get cooking though it was some GOOD SHIT, pal. Lee threw a dropkick on the floor that seemed to go through Mox’s abdomen, then took a back body drop into a pile of chairs and equipment that looked purposely arranged to be as disorganized and dangerous as possible. You could hear a crowd freaking out when Mox kicked out of Brodie’s awesome big boot/sit-out powerbomb too.
I liked how wild the finish got and wish they kept that energy for more of the match – big spot where they crashed through the entrance ramp, Brodie climbing out with blood on his face, Mox hitting the Paradigm Shift for a kickout at ONE, and finally just smacking away at the cut and straight choking Brodie out. **3/4
I dunno, that douchebag Disco Inferno might have point. I can see an argument for any of them individually, but why feed all of Lance Archer, Brodie Lee and presumably Brian Cage to your top guys right away? There’s always re-building, but Jake Hager was more protected than this.
8. Stadium Stampede Match: The Elite (Kenny Omega, Hangman Adam Page, The Young Bucks & Matt Hardy) vs. The Inner Circle (Chris Jericho, Jake Hager, Sammy Guevera, Santana & Ortiz)
This was so much fun, both a cinematic-style wrestling match but also more professional wrestling than any cinematic-style wrestling match done before. Goofball heels aside, you can accept that a 10-man brawl at an empty football stadium with pit stops for individual battles between certain pairings is something Dusty Rhodes would be pitching in the middle of a pandemic until all the Lake of Reincarnation and drone stuff soured him on it.
It was a half-hour wrestling match movie at a football stadium with Super Bowl entrances, random in-ring wrestling sequences, a moonsault off a goalpost, a bodyslam on a recycling bin, some of Broken Matt Hardy’s best gags, a Judas Effect to the Jacksonville Jaguars mascot, and eventually epic individual death scenes for all the bad guys.
The Hangman Page/Jake Hager kung-fu Western bar fight, the emergence of the golf cart to go after Sammy again, the reveal of a NEW drone… this is one of those times when a “wrestling review” is useless as you’re better off just watching all the crazy than reading it.
Also, I laughed. Like genuinely laughed. And not like, “Oh wow, WWE actually did something funny.” Like – they presented comic beats and I genuinely laughed out loud at them. Pretty much everybody played their part, but Santana & Ortiz were the all-stars – amazing entrances, Santana doing the No Mercy Irish Whip to backstage, Ortiz climbing down the 3-foot pool stairs, and facial expressions right before their kill-offs that made me think they’re bound for greatness.
I’m not in the biz, so I know nothing – but this felt like a match put together in a collaborative and fun working environment. There was a joy to it that’s usually missing from WWE, and I imagine a lot of cold beers were smashed in celebration when everybody saw the finished product. ****1/2
Happy Thoughts: There was a lot of downtime in the middle but this was the wrestling show that was needed right now. 8/10
