The Saudi Arabia shows are a terrifying mix of non-canon FUN~! mixed with completely canon bullshit. You can get away with carny moves like a big Battle Royal and treating Mansoor like the Jerry Lawler of Riyadh; you can also pull stuff that might not be looked at fondly by the Americans like Undertaker beating AJ with a chokeslam and Goldberg winning the Universal Title. Again.
Ironically, the in-studio Kickoff Show was an ideally laid out Kickoff Show with the boring match discussion and videos supplemented by a ton of promos.
0. The Viking Raiders vs. The O.C.
Credit to these teams for then chin-locking the usually hyped Saudi Arabia crowd into silence right away, really amazing work. Viking Raiders got the Hardcore Holly show opener pop and Ivar had a little run, at least. Good for them. *1/4
1. Tuwaiq Trophy Gauntlet Match: R-Truth vs. Bobby Lashley w/ Lana, R-Truth vs. Andrade, R-Truth vs. Erick Rowan, R-Truth vs. AJ Styles, AJ Styles vs. The Undertaker
This contest was for an over-sized mountain-shaped glowing trophy and it was probably one of the best things on the show. The ageless R-Truth, whose 24/7 on the WWE Network you really should watch if you have not, got the upset in a few matches and it was all fine enough outside of that weird part where Andrade lost because he fell down.
Then came AJ Styles, who danced. Like really committed to dancing through his whole match as he beat up R-Truth. It was so great it made me regret the entire last few years of AJ trying to play “good wrestler.” Everything from him on, Undertaker reveal included, was pretty awesome. Otherwise, you know. Mountain trophy. **
2. SmackDown Tag Team Title: The New Day [c] vs. The Miz & John Morrison
Decent, completely forgettable Tag Team Title switch outside of Kofi Kingston deciding to leap over the top rope and land back-first into the deep dark pits of nothing. Miz and Morrison are finding a rhythm, but not sure about the entertainment value of Big E Langston taking heat. As usual, New Day brought it home hot. **3/4
3. Humberto Carrillo vs. Angel Garza
Some might be shook walking down an entrance ramp in front of a big crowd that isn’t quite familiar with you – not Angel Garza, who glistens confidence as he walks to the ring grinning before doing the Eddie Guerrero chill-out in the corner while doing CRUNCHES. Now, the match? They’ve got their spots down, if not their match down. Kind of exhibition-like, with a crowd that wasn’t into it. Garza’s dazed delivery of the Canadian Destroyer probably sounded better backstage. **1/4
4. RAW Tag Team Title: Seth Rollins & Murphy [c] vs. The Street Profits
Actually a pretty great match, with a basic tag layout supplemented by fun themes: Dawkins going at Murphy at the bell then launching him over the commentary table later, Rollins and Murphy finding their tag team groove, and Montez Ford always getting cut off from the tag. Rollins is either a selfless gentleman or was actively the worst guy in the match. Extra points for Rollins and Murphy’s spectacular pyrotechnics, as well as those two catching Ford’s tope con hilo. Wooo. ***1/2
5. Mansoor vs. Dolph Ziggler w/ Robert Roode
Here’s Mansoor again just throwing people around and giving big eyes and he kicks ass and is interviewed after matches like he’s this massive WWE superstar. It’s a social experiment that is both fascinating to watch and deeply terrifying. He seems to do way too over-complicated moves for a guy that isn’t regularly working the roster, as Ziggler exemplified a couple times here. Bet he got a stern talking to after that moonsault too. Otherwise, a perfectly fine alternative universe match. **1/2
6. WWE Title: Brock Lesnar [c] vs. Ricochet
Oh. Damn. DUD
7. Steel Cage Match: Roman Reigns vs. King Corbin
They built this around the Superman Punch getting countered a few times before Roman hit one with a chain wrapped around his fist for the win. It was real simple and not very exciting, but I found a little charm in it as some kind of Andre vs. Studd or Warrior vs. Rude match — not as over, but they have a couple premium spots laid out and built the match around them. Nothing must-see, but a match that delivered. **3/4
8. SmackDown Women’s Title: Bayley [c] vs. Naomi
Naomi got it rocking a few times but here was another exhibition-like match, this time in t-shirts. **
9. WWE Universal Title: The Fiend [c] vs. Goldberg
World Wrestling Entertainment, you complicated bastard. WWE didn’t create the next Undertaker in “The Fiend” Bray Wyatt, but they did create their first unstoppable force in a long time… and, well, that’s done now. I love four-spear Bill, but this was stupid. *
Sad Thoughts: Well. Best since the first? Heh. 3/10
