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Happy Thoughts – NJPW G1 Climax 29 Night 3 (7/14/19)

1. G1 Climax – Block A: Lance Archer vs. Bad Luck Fale
This was one of those G1 matches featuring the guys who are the least exciting in their block pitted against each other but they weirdly over-deliver because they understand that and stick to what they’re good at. Everybody involved here was smart enough to know to get right to the brawling and tackling and not spend too much time on stretches of offense or anything, and they got a lot out of each guys’ signature spots. Archer’s crossbody off the top rope spot was impressive but his little tippy-toe walk before it not so much. The Fale superplex on Archer complete with referee Marty Asami bouncing like the ring just exploded was an incredible climax to this G1 Climax match. CLAWWWWWWWW. ***1/2

2. G1 Climax – Block A: SANADA vs. Will Ospreay
I’m not sure SANADA gets enough credit for his ability to go from mat wizard vs. Zack Sabre Jr. to hyper-speed rope-runner guy vs. Will Ospreay and be amazing at both. The ability to do that, the spot where he took a fan’s towel to wipe his sweat, the fact that he is finally tightening up the Skull End… this man is a STAR waiting to happen. Maybe some of the in-between here was a little listless but I cannot deny that in the year of our lord 2019 the professional wrestling is still capable of making my mind melt. The early counter-heavy exchanges here were incredible, capping off with Ospreay breaking out of the Paradise Lock which confirmed how good the early stuff was because Ospreay breaking the near-unbreakable Paradise Lock should have made me grumpy and instead I was like, “Wow – that worked very well.”

Ospreay continues to just run wild, presenting an aura that each G1 match is the biggest of his career. That handspring spin kick that he turns into some kind of front kick mid-air… who is this guy!? The sea of counters at the end didn’t all hit perfect but dear GOD were they some of the craziest I’ve ever seen. Ospreay did a backflip kick off of SANADA which setup an Irish whip that led to SANADA Flair-ing over the top rope to setup a springboard something that Ospreay ducked and followed up with a Spanish Fly where they landed on their feet only for Ospreay to quickly hit a sit-out powerbomb… there was ALL KINDS OF THIS STUFF. I CAN’T EVEN FOLLOW IT CORRECTLY. Towards the end Ospreay’s Storm Breaker setup was countered with a Skull End into a Spinning Skull End to setup a missed moonsault that SANADA landed on his feet off of only for Ospreay to hit he Spanish Fly for a massive near fall, and honestly sometimes we just take wrestling for granted don’t we. ****1/2

3. G1 Climax – Block A: Kazuchika Okada vs. Zack Sabre Jr.
This went just over 10 minutes and was all the better for it, highlighted by Okada driving the crowd absolutely batshit crazy with the greatest kickout timing in professional wrestling off a bunch of beautiful tight ZSJ roll-ups. They didn’t just have me thinking ZSJ was winning several times late in the match, they had me thinking he was winning 3 minutes in. I liked how they got right to it early too, with Okada playing ZSJ’s mat game for a second before ZSJ threw a slap and boot so Okada booted his ass to the mat. Okada sold the hell out of ZSJ’s stretching throughout and it capped off with amazing moment where he responded to a series of nasty-looking slaps with a frustrated dropkick to the BACK, followed by a proper amazing Okada dropkick. ZSJ gave the champ some incredibly cool trouble until a spinning Rainmaker followed by a standard Rainmaker put him out. They already had their epic match last year, so this was just a fun bonus. ****

4. G1 Climax – Block A: Kota Ibushi vs. EVIL
This was one part stiff-ass slugfest and one-part Ibushi playing a lovable underdog as EVIL went after his allegedly injured foot. Compared to the onslaught of singles wrestling that comes with the G1 this didn’t feel quite high-end, but was also a match I’d probably respect the hell out of if it was on RAW or something. At 20 minutes it went a little long but I can’t say they didn’t use the time well as they got over all the story they needed to, with EVIL being a prick, Ibushi struggling to combat that prickishness, and finally Ibushi having to pull some tricks out of his MMA bag and throwing some awesome body blows to make a comeback. The one-legged moonsault after all the foot work was great, as was EVIL’s fire up after an elbow exchange only to bait-and-switch and stomp poor Ibushi’s foot. EVIL just ARRIVING by countering the Kamagoye and finally putting Ibushi away was a perfect finish. ***3/4

5. G1 Climax – Block A: Hiroshi Tanahashi vs. KENTA
Tanahashi doing the guitar taunt and KENTA kicking him in the back of his head was definitely one of the greatest things I have ever seen in my life. Otherwise, I liked this a lot in that it was freaking KENTA vs. Hiroshi Tanahashi in the G1 Climax in a good competitive match, and really it was probably KENTA’s best match in years… but if I’m looking back at this show of G1 matches it honestly might be dead last. What a world! There was a lot of KENTA offense with Tana peppering in stuff at key moments – a caught boot in the corner, a big Sling Blade out of nowhere. It was quality, just lacking a little something that put it over the top, probably a more interesting offensive game by Mr. Itami. As if it ever wasn’t going to be though, the finish was a scorcher. Very good and a legitimate dream match, but if anything it convinced me more of Tanahashi still ruling rather than KENTA returning to his original form. ***3/4