After a whirlwind weekend of professional wrestling that included a pair of great top-to-bottom cards in NXT TakeOver: Phoenix and the Royal Rumble, WWE was back on TV this week for what is almost but not quite the kickoff of the Road to WrestleMania. You see, now we’re going to kind of build to that card (i.e.: Becky vs. Ronda and Rollins vs. Lesnar are SET), but we’re also going to move some pieces around (i.e.: Elias and Rusev are HEELS) to get through Fastlane and Elimination Chamber, so that we can finally kick off The Road to WrestleMania proper.
So this week brought some amazing angles (Becky/Ronda showdown, a NEW WWE Championship made out of HEMP, R-Truth winning the US Title, Samoa Joe spitting hot fire, Elias vs. JEFF JARRETT), some solid angles (Lesnar laying out Rollins, Lashley laying out Balor, Andrade laying out Rey, Angle getting SQUASHED), some fun moments (Mojo’s promo, Bryan saying Rollins’ BURN IT DOWN gimmick promotes air pollution, Io and Kairi teaming up, WALTER), some confusing stuff (Dean and Nia Jax, the crap Women’s Tag Titles qualifiers, 205 Live still being bad), and honestly: not much to speak of in-ring. But the weekend made up for that anyways.
Oh, and Dean Ambrose apparently put in his notice this week. And the fact that this opening isn’t dedicated to him kind of sums up how he’s been doing lately.
RAW (1/28/19)
A solid show with a whole bunch of place-setting en route to WrestleMania. It didn’t hurt that Becky Lynch and Daniel Bryan were here too.
I liked that they got right down to business with Triple H telling Seth Rollins he has to choose his opponent for WrestleMania tonight. Triple H presenting WWE as some well-run corporate organization that needs to get going on promotional materials is funny though, considering it’s – well, WWE. Dean Ambrose interrupted the festivities and could’ve easily come off as a non-entity, but he challenged Rollins and asked Triple H if he needed to ask his father-in-law to set it up and BOOM – Dean, momentarily, was a player again.
Rollins vs. Ambrose ended up basically a solid squash match, highlighted by Dean’s over-the-top curb stomp sell.
It was a weird night for Ambrose – he had a hot exchange with Triple H, got beat clean by Rollins, then he began to cut a classic “I’m gonna sit down on this chair while I talk you sons of bitches” promo before Nia Jax interrupted him and continued her getting physical with the male roster, pushing Dean-O out of the ring.
It was all, in a sense, a journey. And I’m not sure if anyone is better for it yet. It felt very exemplary of WWE’s bipolar way of doing business – they made Dean interesting and a geek at the exact same time.
Both Women’s Tag Team Titles Elimination Chamber Qualifying Matches kind of sucked. Alexa Bliss & Mickie James vs. Nia Jax & Tamina had Alexa taking heat which was a solid dynamic, but Tamina is very bad and there wasn’t much of a reaction beyond Nia’s double Samoan drop. The other one took place later on, as Natalya & Dana Brooke (replacing the injured Ember Moon) took on The Riott Squad in a match where Dana got her hot tag off of Liv Morgan hitting her with an enzuigiri. So that’s how that went.
Baron Corbin essentially squashed Kurt Angle in a match that wasn’t as cinematic as the Drew McIntyre squash of Angle but still ended up a solid piece of business, as it was a match that accomplished something. I love that Angle has made the Angle Slam a hope spot now, something he just throws out in desperation versus the move he uses to finish guys off. He also lost to a SIGNATURE, not even a finisher. I’m not sure where this Angle thing is going, or if it’s even going anywhere. But this is an awesome take on bringing a Legend back – he is not the immortal force that DX or The Undertaker or Kane or Brock are, he is simply human.
Decent Finn Balor promo, decent Bobby Lashley attack. It was a fine follow-up to the Brock loss. Not good. Not bad, either. Fine.
Appreciated the Major Brothers recap prior to Zack Ryder & Curt Hawkins vs. The Revival, which wasn’t much but A) it had a killer Shatter Machine and B) it’s just nice to see a couple lifers like Ryder and Hawkins having a spot on RAW again.
I cannot believe it is 2019 and I just watched Jeff Jarrett and Road Dogg sing “With My Baby Tonight” live on Monday Night RAW and then get beat up by Elias, who’s face turn lasted all of a few weeks. Elias continues to be an enigma for me – magic on the mic, can be used in multiple scenarios, crowd digs him – but does he have legs as a wrestler? He seems to have like 75% of the toolbox.
Either way, he got heated up again beating down a couple old dudes but WWE was kind enough to let Jarrett get a few punches in, and MAN were those awesome punches. Like the best punches on WWE TV in a long time. And I bet Vince McMahon was cracking up backstage, whispering to Triple H he’s never going to let Jeff throw one of those embarrassing punches ever again. Regardless, let me tell you something: you practice the Memphis punch, you’re always over. I popped for “slapnuts” getting a pop, too.
Welp Mojo Rawley cut a great promo and immediately became interesting. Drop the music, drop the ugly gear – just FOCUS, baby, and there might be something.
We finally got the Ronda Rousey vs. Bayley match for the RAW Women’s Title that always felt like a possibility but also always had an issue: how do you make Bayley of all people credible against Rousey? The answer is you do the match as a short TV match and give Bayley just enough before she gets wrecked. It was solid while it lasted, even if there were a few off moments where I thought Bayley was going to pull a Perry Saturn on Rousey. I dug Bayley hitting her Bayley-to-belly into the barricade out of desperation. Finish was fun too with Ronda just being like “enough of this” and tapping her.
And then we got the Ronda Rousey/Becky Lynch showdown and let me just say: this was incredible. There is not much like a WrestleMania main event setup promo where all the stars have perfectly aligned to get us to exactly where we are. And I just can’t not say that it is tremendous that these are two ladies doing this thing, as the Women’s Revolution has beared some serious fruit in making a bunch of new credible main event talents.
Becky was dropping line after line of quality content, the crowd was chanting KICK HER ASS, Ronda threatened to straight-up KILL Becky, and during Ronda’s slightly awkward/possibly awesome rant, Becky was not intimidated at all and just smirked through. We have stumbled onto something, and I wish I could star rate promos because that was five.
Braun Strowman vs. Drew McIntyre was really just an afterthought, which is incredible as there was a moment where it seemed like this might be the WrestleMania direction. They did a bunch of shoulder tackles before Corbin ran in and beat up Braun with Drew. God, Corbin & Drew as a unit is somehow less interesting and credible than Gallus on NXT UK. What’s going on here?
The show ended with a Paul Heyman/Brock Lesnar promo that was interrupted by Seth Rollins just going AT Brock, which is exactly what Seth Rollins should be doing. And then Seth took six F5’s, because this was a show about laying out the good guys (Finn, Braun, Seth) on the road to… redemption? Or maybe a screwy finish leading to a follow-up match at Backlash?
Anyways – Seth Rollins vs. Brock Lesnar as the WrestleMania main event needs some work. It has a brilliant built-in story, but they need to take advantage of it. I hope they do. I think they will. Right? Right??
SMACKDOWN (1/29/19)
This was a really fun show with more WrestleMania place-setting and basically every segment delivering.
Becky Lynch and Charlotte Flair starting the show was fun and all but can we talk about John Cone in a SUIT breaking up their brawl? SWOON! Dug Becky just punching Charlotte in the throat as a response to her shit talk, but Women’s Revolution be damned this was John Cone Time.
Can we also talk about this R-Truth U.S. Title angle? Because holy moly. Just when you think WWE is creatively bankrupt, they do something like THIS in the midcard and you’re like – these sons of bitches still got it, they just don’t ever use it.
It went like this: Truth got a U.S. Title shot against new champ Shinsuke Nakamura as a consolation prize for not getting to the Royal Rumble, Truth pinned Nakamura in like 2 minutes with a cradle that didn’t seem like the end but was, Rusev stormed out demanding a match for the title he just lost, and then Truth beat Rusev with a quick cradle too. And so R-Truth is the champ and Nakamura/Rusev are PISSED, so Nakamura and Rusev join forces and beat up Truth.
That first cradle win was either a fuck-up prior to an eventual R-Truth win or just a brilliant performance by everybody – Nakamura, Truth, even Mike Chioda and commentary. Everybody sold the confusion perfectly, with Chioda’s momentary pause before he rang the bell and Nakamura ready to jump into another wrestling sequence only to be annoyed when the bell was actually rung. Truth meanwhile gave a wonderful “WTF!?” to put it over the top. They NEVER do something this unique, so it felt like a special crazy moment. I loved Byron saying through laughter, “R-Truth is United States Champion, right?”
Such a cool, unique angle with good work from everybody. R-Truth has gotten a lot of accolades over the last year for being a genuinely funny guy, but this angle proves what a valuable player he is – the crowd popped huge for the title win and even the popular Rusev’s heel turn got over because Truth is so loved.
Rusev and Nak, through the mutual respect earned via how much they click in the ring, have apparently decided to team up and I am into it. Plus if this has any legs at all, Rusev just secured himself a post-WWE gig in NJPW.
I like how the SmackDown booking office was like “Hey Ronda doing the Three Amigos suplex on Sasha was cool, how about Andrade does it too but to Rey Mysterio and he also mocks Eddie Guerrero’s poses?” Zelina Vega distracting Rey with a promo leading to an Andrade beating from behind was a fine continuation of the Rey/Andrade feud. The Eddie stuff is all in what they actually do with it. A couple months later with Big Show and Randy Orton was terrible, but a decade and a half later feels fair.
This was also a show where Shane McMahon brought out The Miz‘ FATHER to tell him he loved him and was proud of him. Tremendous goofy segment, George Mizanin is a treat.
Mandy Rose doing a TOUGH ENOUGH (in 2015!) callback to rationalize trying to ruin Naomi‘s marriage is a STRETCH if I’ve ever seen one. This angle is dumb, but it also provides a goofy departure between a great wrestling show.
The Usos vs. The New Day vs. The Bar vs. Heavy Machinery was a 4-Way Tag Team Elimination Match all about Heavy Machinery being in the middle of THIS. It was a solid match with some fun spots – Usos as per usual looked awesome, bumping and flying their way into the crowd’s heart, while Otis had an excellent showing as a guy that might have some legs in this Biz-Ness.
Daniel Bryan introducing his very own WWE Championship, no longer made of animal-based leather but of HEMP, is the best possible timeline. Around this time last year we didn’t even know that he’d ever wrestle again, and here he is as the WWE Champ with his very own heater (Rowan) and a custom title. The custom title… that’s when you know you’ve made it.
“WHY DON’T YOU ACT LIKE THIS IS AN AA MEETING AND SHUT YOUR MOUTH, I’M SHARING WITH THE GROUP.” Oh my GOD, SAMOA JOE!!! What a PROMO! The SmackDown upper midcard/main event scene did that thing you do before Elimination Chamber and interrupted each other to re-enforce that they are indeed going to be wrestling each other at Elimination Chamber, but it was a fun version of that because the SmackDown roster is stacked: AJ Styles, Randy Orton, Jeff Hardy, Mustafa Ali, and of course SAMOA JOE, who capped this promo off with the greatest version of “Boom, Roasted” EVER.
205 LIVE (1/29/19)
This show is baaaad lately. I hope Cedric Alexander is the next to get the Mustafa Ali treatment. Throw him in the middle of the Balor/Lashley feud and you’ve got three interesting matches – Cedric vs. Balor, Cedric vs. Lashley, Cedric vs. Lio.
Beats whatever they’re doing here.
Kalisto vs. Mike Kanellis had Kalisto taking a crazy tope into nothing but a barricade but I dunno. Kalisto might be wearing a mask and doing flips, but this didn’t feel like what this show promised.
I guess the story here is that Hideo Itami vs. Akira Tozawa was likely Itami’s last match in WWE, and I really really really wanted one last (or first) Itami classic in WWE – alas, no. It was a solid match between two guys who are kind of addled from years in WWE and pretty solid evidence of why WWE isn’t all its cracked up to be. Tozawa had a heck of a run early but has become a one-note gimmick who isn’t around enough to be over, while thinking about Itami’s whole run just bums me out. This was the dude and nothing worked – stupid name, stupid injuries, stupid 205 Live. Didn’t help that he hasn’t seemed into it since like 2016. The fire died inside poor KENTA in America, and I hope it can be lit again.
NXT UK 28 (1/30/19)
God bless one show a week. These are still hit-or-miss, but I was getting close to hate watching there for a second. You can only stomach so much Joseph Conners.
Bomber Dave Mastiff vs. “Primate” Jay Melrose was a match between big boys centered around Primate trying to lift up Bomber. I dug it.
Zack Gibson & James Drake are now The Grizzled Young Vets. They cut promo. It was OK. Sid Scala told them they’re wrestling Danny Burch & Oney Lorcan for the NXT Tag Titles. That’s cool.
Chop, dropkick, powerbomb – WALTER has arrived. I liked that he looked offended when Jack Starz got that one back elbow in. Pitch perfect debut.
Jinny‘s squash wasn’t much but the digging her nails in opponent’s arm is a very nice spot. Jinny is great, she’s like a Real Housewife who spent time at the Snake Pit.
I need a big tag team titles match between these guys but Moustache Mountain vs. Fabian Aichner & Marcel Barthel (who had a moment with WALTER backstage prior) was very good, from Bate trading holds with Barthel to Barthel kicking Bate in the head to block Moustache Mountain’s lariat/Dragon suplex combo to Moustache Mountain eventually hitting that combo for the victory. Not a classic, but fun wrestlers wrestling.
NXT (1/30/19)
The post-Phoenix NXT kicked off with Kairi Sane & Io Shirai vs. Marina Shafir & Jessamyn Duke and it was a tremendous tag squash. Shafir and Duke had to take some offense and provide a 3-minute beatdown, while Kairi and Io brought the speed and charisma and pacing and double teams and everything else. These two are awesome. The pop-up elbow drop is such a good tag spot.
Bianca Belair telling Sam Roberts to kiss her ass was good content. I hope they cement her as a big babyface by having her drop him with a Burning Hammer.
The SILENCE for the Forgotten Sons entrance was special, but them vs. Street Profits was pretty good. It was a solid tag that probably would’ve flipped Full Sail out… the big atmosphere helped but it was the best any of these guys have looked. Montez’ tope was NUTS, and I liked the Jaxson Ryker/Angelo Dawkins staredown from across the ring.
MAIN EVENT (1/30/19)
Lucha House Party vs. Jinder Mahal & The Singh Brothers was a fine, fun little matchup – nothing worth seeking out but something Main Event should have more of.
The B-Team vs. The Ascension was one of those Main Event tags that’s the usual rubbish but they’re nice enough to cut the beatdown, so you don’t waste too much time watching it because you’re a weirdo completist that has to.
WWE TV Match of the Week: Probably that WALTER squash, or Io Shirai & Kairi Sane vs. Marina Shafir & Jessamyn Duke
WWE TV MVP of the Week: Becky Lynch
Outside of 205 Live, I watched every episode of WWE TV this week with minimal eye rolls and pretty consistent enjoyment. It’s almost like I’m a fan of this stuff.
RAW: 6/10
SmackDown: 8/10
205 Live: 3/10
NXT: 6/10
NXT UK: 6/10
