We’ve been here before.
WWE says things are shaking up, and week-by-week the excitement around that dissipates, as week after week the expectation of what they would do and reality of what they actually meant diverges further and further until you realize you’re basically watching the same thing you always were plus Nikki Cross.
There’s more backstage stuff, an angle or two that last throughout the show, the NXT cameos, and VINCE – and that’s good… but that’s not exactly some kind of fix to how bland and counterproductive this show has been for months.
Oh yeah, I’m just talking about RAW there. SmackDown’s been kind of awesome. Meanwhile, NXT, 205 Live, and NXT UK all seem consistent, for better or worse.
RAW (1/14/19)
More interesting than usual, but I’m no fool! Giving a 2-week push to some Online Fav like Finn Balor isn’t going to make the product suddenly great again. Interesting, though – and interesting is good.
I’ll say this – Braun Strowman being removed from the Brock Lesnar Universal Title match at Royal Rumble and then Finn Balor beating Jinder Mahal and going on to pin John Cena in a 4-way match at the end of the night and then getting put over by Cena was not something I expected at the start of my Monday.
The show kicking off with another dumb Braun Strowman/Baron Corbin promo wasn’t ideal – “You got FIIIIIRED” sdfkfsdfsd STOP BEING LAME BRAUN – but Elias outing Corbin’s hiding spot in the form of a song followed by Braun flipping Vince McMahon‘s limo was solid TV. Though it was kind of casually just another car flip angle.
Ronda Rousey & Sasha Banks vs. Nia Jax & Tamina was very much a RAW women’s division tag team match-up and by that I mean it was formula stuff that was solid here and there but otherwise completely forgettable. With all the talk of the Women’s Evolution, their RAW TV matches should probably be a little more uniquely structured every week. Regardless, it led to a solid angle with Ronda and Sasha bickering. Ronda vs. Sasha is kind of a gimme – the build isn’t lightning or anything but who cares – it’s Ronda vs. Sasha.
Ultimately, this was The Finn Balor Show, as WWE did that thing where they suddenly strap a rocket on a guy’s back when they decide he’s going to be in a PPV main event like 2 weeks before the PPV. He got it all – Vince questioned if he can compete with the big boys (“all this meat,” as he said it), and then he DID: a quick squash over former WWE Champ Jinder Mahal, a 4-Way Win over John Cena, Drew McIntyre and Baron Corbin where he pinned Cena, and Cena putting him over on the mic and raising his hand. The 4-Way was a fun match but I’m over these multi-man deals until some god damn characters get developed. In the end, I liked what they did here – when WWE wants something to happen, they make it happen. I just wish they would try and make it happen more.
Other than that all that, some other stuff happened: Lucha House Party vs. The Revival was a few wrestling moves that were background noise for EC3‘s random silent debut backstage and also Revival apparently handing in their notice when they got to the back. John Cena bantered with Vince McMahon for old time’s sake and I flipped out for his RUTHLESS AGGRESSION call-back. The Seth Rollins vs. Dean Ambrose vs. Bobby Lashley IC Title Triple Threat match was solid with an awesome finish, though it was mostly Rollins and Lashley as Ambrose might just be officially Confirmed Trash. Lashley’s glee at the title win was awesome too. Otis Dozovic‘s first appearance on WWE TV being him screaming “PRETTY LADY” at Alexa Bliss is kind of a treasure, even if it was awkward live.
Also, a P.A. walked in on Alexa Bliss wearing nothing but a towel and I cracked up at Renee Young‘s deadpan reaction after the segment before she went into a “The superhero world will be shattered…” ad read for GLASS.
SMACKDOWN (1/15/19)
This show had three matches, one of which was 30-seconds, and it was an awesome wrestling TV show.
Opening 30 seconds of this show was astounding – Becky Lynch arriving, running into Heavy Machinery and New Day making protein pancake shakes with a close-up shot of Otis Dozovic squeezing a bag of tuna into a blender, Xavier Woods revealing he’s wearing a The Man shirt so Becky doesn’t kick his ass, and finally Becky calling the shake weak and walking with PURPOSE to the ring. So god damn beautiful.
When Becky Lynch cuts promos she talks like she is telling you a secret. And I like it, even if it gives me vibes of Fred Armisen and Vanessa Bayer’s Dictator’s Best Friends from Growing Up bit. There’s a newfound confidence from her and respect from the crowd and it is very cool.
Becky Lynch also started a match with Peyton Royce with a THROAT PUNCH. And she also did a kind of embarrassing baseball slide. Royce has not done a thing on the main roster and her stretch of offense didn’t exactly “get me,” but god damnit will she work a chinlock and holy hell that spin kick to the top rope is some impressive stuff.
Liked Asuka tapping Billie Kay quickly right after that match with the Disarmer.
AJ Styles making his entrance during the Becky/Asuka staredown was a cool deal I thought.
I feel like AJ and Daniel Bryan are having the dumb WWE feud they always dreamed of having together. We’ve got things between these former pals amped up to a million because of a championship and some hot dogs. I am enjoying watching it play out. The matches are very good too.
Is nobody going to ask why Jey Uso reading Jimmy Uso‘s love notes from Naomi for him seems like a common thing that happens between these two?
Samoa Joe KICKED MUSTAFA ALI‘s ass. Holy cow. Incredible stuff, another notch in Ali’s New Guy belt and another low key great performance by Joe.
Obviously, the story of this show was Rey Mysterio vs. Andrade. This thing wasn’t just wrestling impressive, it was human being impressive. Rey was just unreal – I’ve been watching this guy forever and he’s the only one that still feels like a complete marvel just watching him move. His spots have multiple stages – it’s not just one dive, it’s a series of things. Andrade meanwhile feels like the young guy he has desperately both wanted and needed to work with. Corey Graves used the word “outrageous” at one point and that really sums this up.
It had a serious aura combined with jaw-dropping spots – the rana off the apron which Andrade went all in on, Andrade reversing a tilt-a-whirl headscissors into a sunset flip, a Canadian Destroyer BLOCK before it was eventually hit. This was giving me flashbacks of Nitro crowds being visually excited for the cool shit a young Rey was doing in front of them. Graves again summed it up: “These two have counters for moves I’ve never seen before.” This wasn’t just a great match, it was a statement from Andrade that he has arrived and from Rey that he is still here. Give me a less silly finish and we go the full 5.
Then Jimmy Uso and Mandy Rose did a hotel room skit that could only appeal to Kevin Dunn and maybe softcore pornography aficionados.
The Miz giving Shane McMahon a birthday bash was a fun idea in theory, though it kind of petered out. Miz is leaning completely into this Shane McMahon thing – the enthusiasm on his delivery when he agreed to wrestle Sheamus because it was Shane’s birthday wish was unbelievable. The match with Miz wrestling in a suit against Sheamus wasn’t much – Miz the babyface wrestler still needs some work. Love the guy but he’s no babyface Ted DiBiase or some shit.
205 LIVE (1/15/19)
Lince Dorado and Lio Rush got the Opening 15 Minute Match spot this week and did some dope shit, highlighted by Lio doing a seated springboard off the bottom rope. In a wrestling context I’m not sure any of it quite worked but I enjoyed it all enough while it was happening.
Kalisto, Brian Kendrick (on behalf of Akira Tozawa), and Ariya Daivari (on behalf of Hideo Itami) all got some promo time in advance of next week’s Triple Threat Match and eventual 4-Way Cruiserweight Title Matches. I hope those matches work.
HUMBERTO CARRILLO!!! is on 205 Live! The former Ultimo Ninja just arrived in NXT tagging with Raul Mendoza and he kind of flipped me out in the 2 matches they had and now he’s here, getting a ton of time against Buddy Murphy. It was a cool match, but sometimes the smooth pretty Lucha flying doesn’t mesh well with the crazy slap kick flying. I just kept thinking I wanted Carrillo vs. Andrade.
NXT (1/16/19)
Fine episode of TV.
Good News: Street Profits squashed somebody. And I’m pretty sure Montez Ford still rules.
Forgotten Sons then channeled their economic insecurity into a beatdown on Street Profits.
Bianca Belair and Shayna Baszler did OK on the mic in their mandatory pre-title match promo battle, though it didn’t get my heart racing or anything. This is another match I hope works. I love these two, but I’m having a hard time thinking about how it actually plays out.
Dominik Dijakovic squashed Adrian Jaoude and looked pretty dang good.
HUMBERTO CARRILLO!!! had himself a WEEK as he faced Johnny Gargano in a match where he did a bunch of fun stuff. Also dug a whole lot that it ended with the slingshot DDT.
Kassius Ohno did the favors for Keith Lee in more ways than one this week – he lost clean, he took a huge bump on the Pounce, and he also quickly when they had an awkward Irish whip moment. Otherwise this was just a decent match that had a little more meat, and I am not talking metaphorically – I am talking physically. These are two very large men. And even if the match was not much, watching their large bodies slam into each other in an effort to show superiority was still occasionally cool.
NXT UK 26 (1/16/19)
I guess TakeOver: Blackpool was technically NXT UK 25.
This was one of the best NXT UK’s because it had the TakeOver atmosphere and it also had no bull – just 3 straight-up wrestling matches.
Ligero has found himself a spot as undercard guy who the crowd digs and I support it. He beat Saxon Huxley, though he really should have beat Wild Boar Mike Hitchman.
Isla Dawn vs. JINNY! was alright – Isla did a sweet backdrop driver, and Jinny sitting up out of a Gory Special was kind of amazing.
Mark Andrew & Flash Morgan Webster vs. Fabian Aichner & Marcel Barthel was just a straight-up awesome wrestling match. Aichner vs. Andrews is magic, Aichner and Barthel do a great asskicking, and the finish got a standing ovation. Aichner is an animal: the pop-up backbreaker and his deadlift brainbuster on Andrews were among the incredible things he did here.
MAIN EVENT (1/16/19)
It’s WrestleMania Season on Main Event, which usually means folks going all out for a few weeks hoping somebody taps them for the big game. Not this week, though – there were two tags that I guess I’d call… solid? To Zack Ryder, No Way Jose, Curt Hawkins, Tyler Breeze, Ember Moon, Dana Brooke, Mickie James and Alicia Fox – make your minutes count, baby.
WWE TV Match of the Week: Rey vs. Andrade easily, but don’t sleep on that NXT UK tag.
WWE TV MVP of the Week: Finn Balor
A solid week – RAW was kind of the usual bore with a few more highlights than usual, while SmackDown ruled and also had the incredible Rey vs. Andrade match. The other brands aren’t on fire, but they’re chugging along with some solid stuff and NXT UK post-Blackpool is as interesting as that brand has gotten.
RAW: 6/10
SmackDown: 8/10
205 Live: 5/10
NXT: 6/10
NXT UK: 6/10
