I was struck by an exchange between Vic Joseph, Nigel McGuinness, and Percy Watson on this week’s Main Event.
As No Way “I Can’t Think of a Better Way to Kick Off Main Event!” Jose and Mike Kanellis felt each other out, Joseph asked McGuinness what his strategy would be if he were Mike Kanellis:
McGuinness: Stomp on his feet, kick him in the knees… stop him from dancing.
Joseph: Why would you want to stop him from dancing?
McGuinness: Because it’s annoying.
Percy: Oh come on, Nigel. You gotta learn to have a little fun, man!
I mean – can a point of view be developed at some point?
This happens with pay-per-views too: any time a Kickoff panelist is asked who will win, it’s always right down the middle. One goes for one guy, one the other.
When you’re trying to make all points to all people, you stop making a point.
Is the dancing annoying or is the dancing fun?
Do we know? Does WWE know? Does anybody know?
One might say this is perfect – there is a figure to speak for both points of view!
But why are there just two points of view? And why must those two points be spoken for?
What is the actual ANSWER?
The answer and the point are obfuscated by the need to appeal, the need to appeal to all.
When this happens though – one side here, one side there – nothing actually happens.
And so we are stuck.
On WWE TV.
RAW (10/1/18)
Not a good show but that Elias/Owens thing was an all-timer.
Nothing gets a crowd going like non-title matches.
Dean Ambrose is usually Good Enough but there was a lack of spark to his show opening promo and even less to his match with Braun Strowman. Why can’t he move around and throw shots when on defense like a real god damn WWE babyface? Why does he just lay around?
Roman Reigns vs. Dolph Ziggler followed and was a whole lot of Reigns fighting out of a chinlock. You have to hand it to these two for getting the crowd to bite on the last few minutes considering this story has gone on about two weeks too long. But it was mostly the chinlock fight.
The Ruby Riott vs. Ronda Rousey match was an example of why Riott has been presented as a competitor since the beginning, as she brings credibility to a situation where she has to control Ronda. This was no Ronda PPV Magic, but was a solid match. Not sure why Riott was talking trash during the beatdown though – I mean it’s Ronda Rousey. Ronda’s comeback was excellent, highlighted by what looked to be a punch to the throat.
I cannot believe Bobby Roode vs. Konnor is a match that I watched this week. These might be my least two favorite guys in the company. Konnor winning two weeks in a row is a special kind of RAW weirdness. Leave it to Gable to take a face-first bump on the floor to try and redeem this whole thing.
Now that Konnor’s got the winning streak though, you need to follow-up. Just to see what happens. A Roman Reigns vs. Konnor match kind of has to happen. Actually, this makes me wonder who could have a good match with Konnor in 2018. AJ would go formula but it’d probably be fine. Bryan would probably try a complicated sequence or two. Rollins would try but it wouldn’t be as good as he thinks it is. Kalisto because it has happened before. The Big Show definitely could. Probably Sheamus.
Whether she can wrestle or not, Alexa Bliss doing promos is a good thing. She did one on this show on Trish Stratus and it was good.
The Revival vs. The B-Team – for those that didn’t tune out for Gable/Konnor, here’s this bullshit.
The Authors of Pain attack was nice though. I like how Bo Dallas is making it is thing to do crazy shit every time he gets a few minutes of TV time. Here he took a bump on the apron like he made a bet.
Seth Rollins and Drew McIntyre can bang, baby. Heck of a match before the inevitable run-ins. Rollins did that thing where he moves like a superhuman and Drew is just a freak of a performer – keeps up with everything, big bumps and selling, throws hard shots. The backbreaker on the apron, Rollins’ core strength front cradle, and the Seth bump on the Claymore were all wild spots.
The Elias and Kevin Owens promo on this show was a special deal, an absolute all-time moment in professional wrestling. The term “cheap heat” has evolved to refer mostly to insulting a town’s sports teams, but when Elias insulted Seattle’s non-existent basketball team something special clicked in the crowd and they gave these two 5 minutes of uninterrupted Vickie Guerrero-level heel heat.
This was so good, not just for the heat but to watch these two at work: the realization that they cracked the crowd, the milking of the boos, the turning up of the lights, just two guys having a great time being heel wrestlers.
Owens vs. Lashley meanwhile was very hold-based. Elias swatting Lio out of the air was good though.
Bayley vs. Alicia Fox had Finn Balor as Bayley’s cheerleader which is just the best.
The show closed with a stupid fun nostalgia trip of a finish, with a Shawn Michaels promo being interrupted by an attack from Kane & The Undertaker and Triple H making the save only to be laid out. The Brothers of Destruction look like Svengoolie and are hobbling around but everybody here has a spark that’s missing from most of the show.
SMACKDOWN (10/2/18)
This was kind of a bad show. Felt like they blew through all their ideas prior to Super Show-Down and were just limping to Australia.
Sad AJ Styles cutting a promo from his house was not good. Guy who just had his rival show up at his home being shook and not vengeful is not a good look.
R-Truth/Carmella vs. Andrade Almas/Zelina Vega was a buncha nothing. With WWE pumping out like 48 mixed tags over the next couple months with Mixed Match Challenge, I guess you’ve got to save all the good mixed tag ideas for Facebook.
The New Day and The Bar did their contractually obligated go-home segment and nobody seemed any better for it. Mr. Bootsyworth getting bullied was good TV though. I feel like New Day and pancakes was a meme nobody ever agreed to let happen. Actually, I’m not sure it HAS happened yet.
Tye Dillinger going right after Randy Orton was GOODT. His punches on the table – NOT SO MUCH. This is a cool thing they’re doing for Tye, but going back to the SAnitY blood feud he’s always had issues looking like a badass. The segment ended with Orton trapping Tye’s finger in the ring post and doing the all-time greatest finger breaking spot – sorry Marty.
What is it about Aiden English that Vince McMahon is signing off on him carrying a big angle they put at the top of the hour? I like him enough, but he feels like the antithesis of everything that anybody in this company would want in this spot. And here we are. I’m sure this whole One Night in Milwaukee thing has a disappointing payoff, but it’s fun enough TV right now.
Shelton Benjamin vs. Daniel Bryan is a match that is just going to be good no matter what. So it was. Benjamin goes right at Bryan, looks mean, targets the ribs, Bryan sells, and Benjamin throws Bryan against the barricade like a crazy person and cuts off Bryan’s comeback with a release German suplex. All the while Miz is ranting on commentary. Then Miz distracts Bryan and Benjamin BEATS HIM. WOW.
That DIVING HEADBUTT THOUGH.
The show ended with two women’s segments, which is a nice trend to see considering how under-the-radar it is that the ladies are casually filling up more TV time than ever. I mean WWE will hard-sell things like the Evolution PPV and Women’s Rumble until you’re blue, but stuff like this is still happening without the fanfare.
Asuka vs. Peyton Royce was a fine 300 seconds as these two went hard. Peyton was throwing elbows, Asuka was moving fast, and Peyton hit a Widow’s Peak that looked like a shoot move.
Enjoyed Becky Lynch cutting what appeared to be a heel promo and the crowd being like YES WE AGREE WITH THE POINTS YOU ARE MAKING. If Becky disses the home sports team, OK – she’s a baddie. But this still reads like she is the ultimate cool good guy, highlighted no better by all the boos Charlotte got for running out and kicking her as.
MIXED MATCH CHALLENGE (10/2/18)
B’N’B vs. Mahalicia – This was good wrestling… Foxy was messing with Finn, Bayley was howing more life than usual, and Jinder vs. Finn is a good match-up. The Mixed Match Challenge usually has a looser feel than RAW or SmackDown, but Fox is the only one who goes all in with trying new wild shit. Her shaking of Finn off the ropes cracked me up.
Day One Glow vs. Ravishing Rusev Day – This was predominantly a dance contest which, I mean, OK. Jimmy doing the Too Cool spot with Rusev as Rikishi until Rusev kicked him in the face was awesome.
205 LIVE (10/3/18)
This is a much more compact show now and I like that.
Jack Gallagher and Akira Tozawa is a fine pairing and they had a fine match that got some time, even if it was mostly pretty quiet. All of Tozawa’s signature spots look SO good and his tope remains the best in wrestling, outside of Ember Moon’s every few months.
They actually ran an angle afterwards, with Drew Gulak dropping Brian Kendrick from his crew. Babyface Brian Kendrick instead of throwback heel that will never get over on 205 Live is a good direction, as is what might be Gulak putting together a stable of badass grapplers.
God, Kalisto vs. TJP was boring as shit. Stop putting TJP on long stretches of offense. Guy this boring doesn’t deserve a cool mask-ripping gimmick.
NXT (10/3/18)
This was another NXT that was fine and mostly made sense but had nothing must-see.
Lacey Evans has got to be a Performance Center coach’s dream – aggressive, athletic, tight holds, pulls hair while applying a hold. Plus I assume she is the living breathing fantasy of at a minimum 95% of WWE executives. Her match with Candice LeRae was a basic short TV match that was more about Candice firing up when Lacey mentioned her husband, only to walk into the Woman’s Right for 3.
Forgotten Sons had an OK squash but this will be an uphill battle.
Johnny Gargano vs. Tony Nese was a reminder that both Gargano and Nese are pretty good. I mean, of course you had the Nese bodyscissors, which is the come-down moment that ensures every match he is in isn’t THAT good, but this was fun to see Gargano wrestling again and Nese hitting his stuff in front of a crowd that was impressed. The tilt-a-whirl Gargano Escape and the crowd actually reacting to Nese’s 450 splash near fall were both very nice moments.
Hey look they did an actual thing that gives Oney Lorcan and Danny Burch some character cool.
EC3 vs. Lars Sullivan was a grudge match where nobody really cared about the grudge. EC3 ain’t a babyface and the front-facelock legsweep is a bad move. These are two guys who just need to be called up already.
MAE YOUNG CLASSIC 2018 – EPISODE 5 (10/3/18)
1. Mae Young Classic – Round 2: Toni Storm vs. Hiroyo Matsumoto
These are a couple of professional wrestlers, baby. Matsumoto brought the pain while Storm brought the crowd giving a shit. Holds, Matsumoto’s sweet missile dropkick, the slap exchange – good good good. Dug Toni sneaking the win after Matsumoto’s reckoning too. ***1/4
2. Mae Young Classic – Round 2: Rhea Ripley vs. Kacy Catanzaro
Not the smoothest version of the little flyer vs. powerlifter dynamic but it’s still a fun dynamic. Kacy has undeniable charm and Rhea as lady Pete Dunne is good stuff. Kacy’s tilt-a-whirl DDT was WILD, and I liked how her screwing up then re-doing the springboard dropkick was somehow cooler than her hitting it the first time. **3/4
Mae Young Classic – Round 2: Lacey Lane vs. Taynara Conti
Not sure I get Lacey Lane. The moves take too long and the charisma ain’t there for the Cinderella role, even if Full Sail digs her. Anyways, this is a 2-minute match with Conti very questionably putting herself in a position for Lane to hit a crucifix bomb. *
4. Mae Young Classic – Round 2: Meiko Satomura vs. Mercedes Martinez
HERE WE GO! IT’S… MEIKO TIME! This was awesome. First of all, I love how Meiko Satomura is presented in WWE as if she is the God damn Undertaker, just such a reverence and awe for the legend. I assume whoever got assigned to produce this went up to them and went, “Eh – you do you.”
This here match was just these two beating the fuck out of each other. It was beautiful. In between that Mercedes Martinez kept trying to hit the Fisherman’s buster and when she did hit it, she got a major near fall. That was beautiful too. The hold-trading early on was cool too, and Mercedes slap after she escaped the headscissors was a proper, “OK – this is gonna get wild now.” Meiko was dropping shoot DDT’s and sweet kicks and in the end she had to basically KO Mercedes’ ass to win. Tremendous. ***3/4
MAIN EVENT (10/3/18)
This was an episode of Main Event with some SHOCK WINS, as both Mike Kanellis and Tyler Breeze went over!
Kanellis vs. Jose was as Main Eventy as it gets but hey Kanellis won.
Tyler Breeze vs. Mojo Rawley was weirdly good though. The first half was the usual, but towards the end Mojo went for the Pounce and Breeze countered with a sweet leg takedown into a half crab and the crowd was like, in their best Renee Young voice, “OK!” I swear we’d still be talking about the pop if Mojo tapped right then and there. Alas, they moved into a couple of legitimately compelling near falls and by golly this was a bonafide MAIN EVENT MATCH WORTH WATCHING.
WWE TV Match of the Week: Mercedes Martinez vs. Meiko Satomura
WWE TV MVP of the Week: Elias and Kevin Owens
A few fun moments and some solid wrestling aside, a weak week. Not good.
RAW: 3/10
SmackDown: 4/10
205 Live: 3/10
NXT: 5/10
