Toru Yano vs. SANADA – G1 Climax (Block B)
The very definition of fun for the whole family. SANADA’s weird sense of humor is a perfect fit for the Yano shenanigans. They had a hilarious match in this year’s New Japan Cup and took the non-sense one step further in this one by involving Rocky Romero. SANADA putting Rocky in the Paradise lock and then taking the time to put his head-set back on his head before sliding in the ring might be the best spot of the entire G1 Climax. **1/2
Hirooki Goto vs. Tama Tonga – G1 Climax (Block B)
When the highlight of your match is Red Shoes flipping off the Bullet Club OG’s, you know you’ve got issues. This never got cooking like Tama’s matches with Naito and Ishii, they just had a bland back and forth with the usual interference spots. Some of the late-match criss-cross spots looked awkward: both guys ending up running in the same direction got audible laughs from the crowd. **1/4
Juice Robinson vs. Zack Sabre Jr – G1 Climax (Block B)
This kinda took a while to get going. The early opening stuff with both guys trading awkward strikes and getting an appropriately flat response from the Osaka crowd was not my idea of a good time. But once Zack lasered in on Juice’s injured hand, this baby started going somewhere. I’m an easy to please kinda guy, and ZSJ countering dudes’ entire move-sets into hurty submissions always does it for me.
The guy also works these holds like no other wrestler on the roster, except maybe Minoru Suzuki. He won’t just apply a plain old Triangle choke, he’ll grab your wrist and vigorously try to break it at the same time. As always, Juice’s babyfacing was on point but this time around the UN-TAPED PUNCH spot completely flopped. Zack had to wait around for it like an idiot and the punch itself looked like shit. Loved the batshit-insane submission ZSJ used to get the win though. Solid but uneven match. ***1/4
Kenny Omega vs. Tomohiro Ishii – G1 Climax (Block B)
There was so much content to process in this match that I had to watch it twice in a row to fully grasp what the fuck I had just seen. I’m the kind of wrestling nerd that will always prefer classic story-telling over head-drop heavy spectacle, but as far as ‘’holy shit what am I even witnessing’’ matches go, this was right up there. Kenny tried to slap Ishii around like a little bitch, paid a hefty price for committing such a sin and then things escalated into all-out nuclear warfare. There wasn’t much of a story beyond two guys going back and forth trying to kill each other, but the level of execution and intensity was so impressive that I stayed glued to my computer screen for the entire thing, only moving from time to time to pick up my own jaw off the floor.
One of the keys to enjoying this match is accepting that IWGP Champion Kenny Omega is kind of overpowered. If he was a character in one of his beloved Street Fighter games, Capcom would have to nerf the shit out of him. They couldn’t be more different wrestlers, but Kenny and Minoru Suzuki both wrestle with this kind of mind-set. They’re constantly one step ahead of their opponents and playing with crowd expectations at every turn. This match was filled to the brim with these kinds of shockers: Ishii defying the odds and seemingly charging up for a big triumphant comeback only to have his face crushed by a V-Trigger out of nowhere.
Meanwhile, Ishii is the perfect guy to take on the self-proclaimed best wrestler in the world and smash his hyperbole into pieces. Not only does he have the unrivaled underdog charisma to draw the crowd into these epic showdowns, but he’s also a real-life tough son of a bitch that adds a certain credibility to all the kickouts and delayed selling. Because yes, this is a match where guys go right back on offense after taking the nastiest head drop suplexes you’ve ever seen, but it’s done in a frenzied and impactful way that makes it easy to suspend disbelief and put down the Wrestling Analysist notepad for a minute. Plus, they were careful to add in some double KO sequences where both guys would finally put over all of these freaking bombs.
The secret weapon of match was Milano Collection AT on commentary. This man is nothing less than a national treasure. He added so much excitement to this thing by freaking out over the big spots and screaming his head off like he was witnessing a 90’s All Japan match. His ‘’HOLY SHIT’’ reaction to the apron foot stomp was an all-time great moment. Pure shock. And him losing his god damn mind was truly essential to the picture Kenny and Ishii were painting in the last minutes of the match. Both guys firing off their final desperation strikes: Kenny with one last V-Trigger, Ishii responding with an enzuigiri. Blood flying off both wrestlers. Ishii finally being able to grab Kenny with the Brainbuster for a massive Osaka pop. An incredible moment to end a true mind-melter of a match. ****3/4
Tetsuya Naito vs. Kota Ibushi – G1 Climax (Block B)
The Anti-Naito Osaka crowd is a special thing. They can make or break a match depending on who Naito’s facing. For me, it really hurt the Jericho match and completely fucked the heel/face dynamic they were going for. Here, against angelic moonsaulting babyface anime hero Kota Ibushi, it was perfect. And Naito played with it wonderfully, just like he did in that great Dominion match with Tanahashi last year. Constantly giving the crowd these haughty looks of contempt while being a complete dick to Ibushi with the incessant spitting and slapping. Full Heel Naito truly is the best Naito. Don’t need no shades of grey.
Before I keep gushing about this match, let’s get one thing out of the way. People need to stop trying to have leg-work matches with Kota Ibushi. Kota’s great at lots of things, but limb selling is not one of them. And I’m not the kind of professional wrestling reviewer that demands Toshiaki Kawada-level selling out of every wrestler, but I do like when limb attacks are at least minimally acknowledged. Grab your leg in pain once or twice, I don’t care if the acting isn’t 100% consistent – as long as you try to do something with it. Ibushi just full-on ignores this stuff when he goes back on offense, and in a match with the kind of wickedly smart leg work Naito was delivering, it’s kind of a bummer.
Back to the good stuff: in my notes for this match, there are 3 separate occasions where I wrote ‘’this is the craziest bump I have ever seen’’. In this dark and uncertain post Hiromu/Dragon Lee-era of wrestling that we live in, I don’t know if Naito taking Ibushi’s springboard German suplex full force on his neck is the smartest thing to do, but it sure was mesmerizing. The one thing that both guys did a lot better here than in their G1 match last year is that they took the time to build up to this crazy stuff. The aforementioned Naito death bump actually felt important because they kept teasing it earlier in the match. I also dug how they worked around that top-rope Piledriver from last year but never actually went through with it. Same thing with Ibushi flipping out of the reverse Frankensteiner – more interesting than them actually hitting the move.
As I was losing my shit for Naito countering the Kamigoye with the most fluid Destino I have ever seen in my life, I realized that there are very few guys that can actually make all of Naito’s offense look good. The Destino is a super rad move in theory, but it looks like crap roughly 50% of the time because it’s way too hard to take properly. Ibushi is one of the select few that can make Naito’s offense reaaaaally pop (I would also put Kenny and Okada in this category). And you better believe that things were popping in these last few minutes: Naito’s reverse piledriver as a revenge for the Kenny loss/callback to their old NJC match and Ibushi responding in kind with the WILDEST reverse brainbuster counter to the Destino were two things that blew my mind to bits.
We have now reached the point where this review is way too long. So here is the short version: Kota Ibushi is terrible at selling limbs but everything else about this match was amazing. Love both of these fellas, flaws and all. ****1/2
