Why do some wrestling fans (me) continue to watch WWE every week if it disappoints them (me)?
Why, when their (my) desired payoff never actually comes, do wrestling fans (me) continue to invest their time an energy into this?
My guess is that these fans (me) continue to watch WWE because it is such a fascinating niche product.
And that the wrestling fan (me) wants to be a part of something bigger than themselves.
Something that they (me) can know a lot about. Something that they (me) can be an expert at. Something that they (me) can share with other like-minded weirdos.
And when the wrestling emerges from its downswing, as it usually does, their (my) investment in it pays off.
It feels nice.
RAW (6/4/18)
Do you hear that? Can you feel it? The NEGATIVITY and the CYNICISM is seeping into my veins. Damn you, WWF! Damn you.
This was a show where I was glad I owned a cell phone in which I could do whatever bullshit I could on it because while the show had the occasional neat moment (Elias, tacos, Braun) it overall completely sucked.
Elias was a good start and the show kind of peaked at him. He’s a guy with such a command of who exactly he is, one of the only guys in wrestling that is better because he is not over-the-top but understated. His timing, his delivery, his simultaneous likability and dislikability – guy is a superstar.
The Reigns & Rollins vs. Elias & Jinder tag won’t change lives but there are a lot worse ways to kill TV time, and given the state of WWE tag team wrestling, the very much over Reigns & Rollins are basically the best tag team on the roster. Reigns was doing incredible corner work and the setup for his beatdown with Sunil pulling Jinder away from the Drive-By followed by Elias’ knee to the back was sweet.
I don’t know who pitched the idea of Curt Hawkins fighting for not just his first win in 200 matches but tacos for the crowd, I don’t know who pitched the idea of Baron Corbin robbing the crowd of tacos, but I want to meet this person and shake their hand. If RAW is going to suck then at least make it fun.
Why is the Lone Wolf now Stephanie McMahon’s Constable? What is going on?
I kinda liked Nattie trying to take down Nia with headlocks. Otherwise, it was a bad match. Awkward post-match angle with Nattie’s leg injury too, though the ROUSEY STARE is over.
Braun Strowman vs. Bobby Roode was some stuff to get to Braun smashing a ladder in half. And that was cool. The match? It was bad.
The best part of the Tag Team Battle Royal was JoJo awkwardly running down the rules after everybody had started wrestling, and Drew McIntyre deciding to just stand on the apron and show off his chest to Vince McMahon on the hard cam. Otherwise – Battle Royals are usually stupid but kind of fun, and this one wasn’t even fun. I like The B-Team, but there is no charm in a push for jobbers if everybody else in their division is also a jobber.
The Sami Zayn/Lashley promo made me wonder why I even liked wrestling in the first place.
The Sasha/Ember/Alexa Then Bayley vs. Riott Squad 6-man was solid stuff. Logan’s pop-up headbutt was awesome. The Bayley angle and match getting overturned by Constable Corbin and all that stuff would’ve come off better on a better show. As it was, it was just awkward.
Sometimes, awkward can be good though. Case in point: Big Show doing the Finn Balor pose.
Sometimes I reflect on how cool it is Balor and Owens are main eventing RAW, and sometimes I think about how shit the RAW was before it. They had an alright match that was a little lifeless. They ran through their stuff and I’m not sure anybody got very invested. I sure didn’t. Owens working armbars as opposed to headlocks was at least new.
Finn Balor jumped off a high place at the end of this show. Me too, buddy. Me too.
SMACKDOWN (6/5/18)
This was a solid show, but nothing must-see (even with the most must-see man on television, The Miz). Unfortunately, a solid show is a huge step up from RAW which actively set half their roster back. This was just a bunch of talented folks humming along on a decent two hours of wrestling. Asuka wanting to fuck up two ladies at once, Charlotte vs. Becky, Samoa Joe’s promo, AJ’s slap to Nakamura, and the 6-man main event were all a good time.
The Carmella/Asuka stuff and Asuka vs. Mandy/Deville wasn’t the most compelling 15 minutes of wrestling but it had good bits. It was a good deal for Asuka – demanding a Handicap Match cause she’s a badass, then winning the Handicap Match cause she’s a badass. And really needed a good deal. Carmella was also great on commentary, so perfectly annoying and clearly having a blast with her character.
Karl Anderson vs. Harper was like 45 seconds long.
Jimmy Uso & Naomi vs. Aiden English & Lana had Aiden selling his throat which was neat and Jimmy Uso offense which was neat but it also had Lana awkwardly working over Naomi. The people want to cheer Rusev Day but we are still here.
I dug the old school sit-down table interview of the AJ Styles/Nakamura contract signing, though it wasn’t exactly Hogan vs. Andre. AJ threw a STIFF slap, baby.
They might work on TV like once every 4 months but Charlotte and Becky Lynch tore it up together. It was like 5 minutes long but so much fun while it lasted. The counter of the Figure-8 into the Disarmer was tremendous too. Now can you imagine if they actually do something with Becky Lynch!? Oh man.
Samoa Joe had himself another strong promo, big surprise. He’s clearly the most logical pick for Money in the Bank and a guy ready, at least character-wise, for a run on top. So that means it’s probably not happening.
Here’s the thing – Big Cass is not a bad promo, but of all the things to get some time on this show – they went with this? Cut this down a couple minutes and give me more Becky/Charlotte, give me more Karl/Harper, give me Samoa Joe just longform reciting the U.S. Constitution.
Sidenote: the Daniel Bryan WWE.com promo was probably more effective than anything on WWE TV this week.
ALMAS/CARA NEXT WEEK YAAAASSSS!!!
The New Day vs. Miz/Joe/Rusev had some good action but was definitely a match that led to a spot where The Miz threw pancakes at his partners by mistake. I am into New Day getting some love, but this match would’ve come off a lot better on if anyone really came off as a superstar right now.
Also – where is Jeff Hardy?
205 LIVE (6/5/18)
Like most 205 Live’s lately, a show with a couple OK things that may or may not lead somewhere and a kickass main event. Could be worse. Could be way better.
Brian Kendrick vs. Lince Dorado was very OK. You can tell these guys all want this to work but Lucha House Party’s annoyingness (noisemakers = the worst) negates all the neat flying. And though I can respect Kendrick’s Generic Bad Guy shtick, no crowd ever seems to buy into it. I did like the finish with Kendrick colliding with the corner and stumbling into the Golden Rewind.
TJP doing a promo during his squash match is probably something that should have happened over a year ago when he first turned heel. Right here, right now, it was pretty cool, but not still not positive it goes anywhere beyond a match with Cedric that won’t get over. “As for this guy – it’s tapout time” – NICE.
Look – Lio Rush is a shockingly good promo.
Mustafa Ali vs. Buddy Murphy was a good match with some incredible spots. I wish Buddy Murphy came off as more of a wrestling superstar, but he is one of the only guys in WWE who’s matches are must-see, mostly because he wrestles like such a Big Match Wrestler – intense strikes, jaw-dropping spots, and takes 2-3 moves per match right on his head. I don’t necessarily want to promote landing on your head, but if the guy is doing it safe then kudos to him, because it’s flipping me out. There might be a larger point to be made that one of the only guys who appears to be great at wrestling in WWE these days is a guy who lands on his head, and maybe I will write something about that one day.
Great match though. There was solid stuff around the big spots with Buddy working over Ali, but this was absolutely about the big spots. Buddy taking the reverse rana and apron X-Factor on his head was wild, as was the roll-through X-Factor being countered with a Buddy knee. Ali’s tilt-a-whirl DDT to the floor was an amazing amazing amazing amazing amazing thing too.
And then Hideo Itami interfered.
Well OK then.
NXT (6/6/18)
NXT isn’t completely dialed in but it’s the best weekly show WWE is producing right now by a mile.
I like Shayna Baszler. I like Nikki Cross. I liked their opening promo. Shayna isn’t great doing a longform promo but she has a command of her character, and Nikki’s DO IT DO IT DO IT and not being afraid of Shayna was great.
I liked the The Mighty squash, not due to anything they did, but there were two cool things: 1) Jobber Hughley took a classic sloppy jobber bump to the floor when his leg clipped the rope and 2) Mauro was selling The Mighty’s average strikes like they were DEATH.
Dug Lars Sullivan just wrecking poor Performance Center trainees.
Roderick Strong vs. Danny Burch was a fine 5 minutes of tight work and backbreakers but it was all about Pete Dunne’s staredown and attack of Roddy post-match – there’s your money.
“The difference between The King and a Prince… the King WAS good, but the Prince knows there’s a bigger crown” – nice work, Velveteen Dream.
Kairi Sane vs. Lacey Evans didn’t quite catch lightning in a bottle like last time but that’s why it’s called lightning in a bottle. It was still a good match. Sane is an excellent underdog and Evans’ strikes are great – there is an awesome knee that Sane runs directly into, at one point she just punches Sane right in the stomach. Lacey’s double-jump moonsault was tremendous too.
Sweet Ciampa promo, sweet show-closer brawl with Johnny Badass. And they got COLOR, baby. Establishing happy-go-lucky Johnny Wrestling as an asskicker is cool to see and will also be very rewarding for him as he moves forward.
MAIN EVENT (6/6/18)
No Way Jose vs. Mike Kanellis was the most basic-ass crowd-pleasing wonderful Main Event match of all time. At no point did anything hit even first gear and at the same time I guarantee them fans in the crowd had a great time watching Jose’s hips shake in those bright green pants.
I wish there was more to Gulak/Tozawa – it was a fun little match but that’s it. Loved Gulak just trapping Tozawa’s ass in the sleeper for the finish.
WWE TV Match of the Week: Mustafa Ali vs. Buddy Murphy
WWE TV MVP of the Week: Elias
The journey to Money in the Bank continues to suck, though SmackDown had a few highlights and the journey to NXT TakeOver: Chicago has been excellent.
RAW: 2/10
SmackDown: 5/10
205 Live: 6/10
NXT: 7/10
