Is it just me or are they pacing the Kickoff Show’s better lately? There are a lot more appearances from the talent and it keeps things moving. Although, fast-forwarding Peter Rosenberg remains a highlight.
Good to have Booker T back.
“It is now officially time to put some fists to some faces.”
0. Luke Gallows & Karl Anderson vs. The Miztourage
This was a tag team match in which professional wrestling maneuvers were performed until one team was victorious. It felt even less energetic and pointless than a Main Event match. That Karl Hi-ya kick missed by a mile too. I liked Gallows’ nerd chant, Karl’s bump outside to setup the beatdown, and Axel’s “oh my god did you see that!?” after his dropkick. *1/4
WHAT WAS THAT REVIVAL PROMO? First Mike Rome starts off about to call them Gallows & Anderson, then Cole just starts talking and they CUT IT OFF. What is going on here!?
Corey Graves is starting to give me Milo vibes – take a step back, man.
Had a hearty laugh at Michael Cole repeating the “Sasha Banks is nervous” story from the Kickoff, as if he was re-telling a joke word for word and didn’t realize the audience already heard that bullshit.
1. Elimination Chamber – RAW Women’s Title: Alexa Bliss [c] vs. Sasha Banks vs. Bayley vs. Mickie James vs. Mandy Rose vs. Sonya Deville
This was a good big crazy-ass gimmick match – had a few dead spots but was a real good time with every big moment hitting well.
Alexa Bliss got herself a Road Warrior pop. I like that it actually kind of feels special every time she wrestles because she never ever does. Her “I shouldn’t be here” faces as she entered were great too.
There was a LOT of fun stuff: The pod staredowns. Absolution’s matching white gear. Mandy Rose’s glee as she entered when it was Bayley vs. Sonya. Sonya’s insane spear on Bayley. Sonya bumping like a nut any time she got the chance. Sasha’s entry into the match with her just throwing rapid fire hands and WRECKING Mandy on the pod. Alexa climbing away to escape from Sasha and Bayley. SASHA KICKING BAYLEY OFF THE GOD DAMN POD, an epic moment performed beautifully.
Cool eliminations too: Mandy’s selling of the Bank Statement and Bayley just throwing her whole body at Sonya to block the save was cool. Mickie’s big pod dive onto Sonya was cool. The Sasha and Bayley double team on Mickie was cool.
Now, there was bad too: Five minutes of Bayley vs. Sonya Deville to start was not well thought-out. A lot of the in-ring was very much vaguely OK. Absolution did not lay in a very credible beatdown on Bayley. Bayley waiting for the Alexa cradle after the top rope Bayley to Belly was WEAK.
Overall, there was a ton of “yay” reaction from the crowd but very little actual genuine reaction to most of what they were doing.
Still though, match was a great time. Sasha Banks looked head and shoulders above everybody in this match – her entry brought the energy, and once everybody got out of the way she and Alexa brought the house down.
The finish was awesome, with Alexa and Sasha going all Misawa vs. Kobashi on each other. The Twisted Bliss off the pod was INCREDIBLE, what a spot. Loved the simple finish too with Alexa pushing Sasha’s face into the pod and DDT’ing her off the top. Great stuff. ***3/4
Alexa Bliss crushed her post-match promo, going full over-the-top babyface with YOU DESERVE IT chants and lines like “So dare to dream and dream big…” before she obliterated the crowd’s soul with “I’m looking out here at all of you and… the reality of it is none of you will ever accomplish any of your dreams.” This woman is on her way to WRESTLEMANIA.
2. RAW Tag Team Title: Cesaro & Sheamus [c] vs. Apollo & Titus O’Neil w/ Dana Brooke
A Solid Tag Match. Cole proving Coach wrong on game plan not being one word might have been the best part. They built some heat on Apollo but not sure it ever got heated. I did like how old school the Apollo reaching for Titus spot was, and there was some neat stuff as they headed towards the end. Cesaro bumping around for Hot Tag Titus was great, and I liked the sequence with Sheamus flubbing his climb up top, reacting to it, getting caught in a Clash with the Titus leading to a hot save by Cesaro and finally a dive over the top with Apollo. **3/4
3. If Nia Jax Wins, She Enters the WrestleMania RAW Women’s Title Match: Asuka vs. Nia Jax
Asuka is a queen. What an entrance. And what a wrestling match. Asuka the Destroyer is great, Asuka the Underdog is something better than that. I was so in love with everything that was Asuka ducking and diving Nia and not able to get any momentum, and everything feeling just a little bit stiffer and reckless than normal – it is SUCH a great dynamic.
They packed in so much goodness around that dynamic too – Nia catching the butt bump in the ropes and just snatching Asuka’s hair, Asuka trying to hook big Nia in a kneebar, the deadlift vertical suplex that turned into a Jackhammer, Nia screaming at Asuka before taking a third kick, Asuka going up top and Nia just smacking her, the BANZAI DROP, Asuka just running full force into Nia and going down, Nia’s deadlift out of the cross armbreaker, and finally Asuka just catching Nia with a rana and cradle to end it. SO good. ****
And they gave Nia and Asuka a barricade spot post-match! That’s when you know you are made.
4. Woken Matt Hardy vs. Bray Wyatt
This had a few fun parts, I guess. Matt keeps increasing the campiness. Bray’s turn-around clothesline on the outside was nice. But ultimately it was a fine wrestling match that lost me for a little while. **
Ronda Rousey Contract Signing
Ronda Rousey on the mic was scary bad, but this got pretty great. You had Triple H’s subtle “shut up, don’t say anything” as Ronda prepared to sign the contract, Angle’s hilarious “HEY RONDA GUESS WHAT THEY’RE SCREWING YOU OVER” cut-in, the “3 years in the making and now we own this bitch” line. Ronda’s reactions to Angle’s reveals were so much better than her on the mic. And then Triple H took a table bump! And Steph slapped Ronda! And the crowd chanted YOU FUCKED UP!!! It was all a little telegraphed, but this was good quality sports entertainment.
“We are in Vegas, so I’m sure you’re used to seeing someone you love behind bars” – WOWWWW ELIAS IS THE GREATEST.
5. Elimination Chamber – Winner Faces Brock Lesnar for the WWE Universal Title at WrestleMania: John Cena vs. Roman Reigns vs. Seth Rollins vs. Braun Strowman vs. Finn Balor vs. The Miz vs. Elias
These big gimmick matches are all about the moments and keeping the fun going in between those moments and this delivered on that, even if it took a while to get moving. Everybody in this match is really talented and they delivered everything well, but it took a while to get moving beyond “delivered everything well.”
Those moments, though: Braun scaring Miz from the pod, Miz putting up a Too Sweet, the Rollins/John staredown, John laughing at Seth like a supervillain, the Quadruple Shield Bomb.
Oh – and all-time great BRAUN STROWMAN IS STRONG stuff. I was flipping out for some of this – the kickout at ONE on the AA, the kickout – PERIOD – of the Spear, Braun just running through The Miz and Elias and JOHN CENA. Braun just pinned Cena’s ass CLEAN, man! With a POWERSLAM. I liked Finn’s run against him too, made for a great dynamic. Finn got the hands, Seth got the hands, everybody went down to BRAUN.
GREAT finish, too: Reigns, exhausted, goes through the Greatest Hits with Braun. He DIVES OVER THE TOP ROPE. Braun runs at Reigns and crashes through a pod! Reigns goes for a spear, Braun counters with the powerslam that has ended everybody, but Reigns gets out and runs at Braun and manages a Superman punch, then a SPEAR which Braun STANDS UP FOR only to be downed for good by a second spear.
You know, one of my favorite parts of that match was during the spot where Elias tried to pin everybody, Reigns had the best 2.9 kickout by far to the point where for a split-second I bought that the Big Dog was going down to Elias. That’s The Guy. Go get ’em, Roman. ****
Braun lays out Roman to end the show, which is awesome, but WTF is this guy doing at Mania???
Depressed John Cena on RAW Talk was transcendent, by the way. Must watch.
The RAW brand bats pretty well these days and this was no exception, a really fun show. Everything outside of the Kickoff and Wyatt/Matt matches was good, with Asuka vs. Nia Jax and both Chamber matches being especially good. 7/10
